I’m writing this poem for a couple reasons, once and foremost, suicide. No, I’m not here to tell you that you’re beautiful or perfect the way you are. You’re only as perfect as you make yourself. If you think that you are the most ugly and disgusting thing in the world, then you’re going to be. If you think that you have so many imperfections that you can never be perfect, then you never will be. Once you focus on the bad things they are all you think about, and the bad things start to take over, and you feel like you can’t get away from said bad things. The truth is that it is almost impossible to get away from them. You may need help, you may not. But either way it ***** It takes you forever to get back to the person that you used to be. But maybe you don’t want to go back to that person. And I can tell you now, it’s up to you. But if you want to, you have to work for it to get back the things that made you who you were, the possessions, the people, and the feelings. Then let go, let go of all that’s holding you back.
Apr 5, 2013
Apr 5, 2013 at 3:30 PM UTC
My reflection in the mirror is something I don’t want to see
Something I don’t like to see
If I see it I stare in till I find every little think that is wrong with me, every little imperfection
When I find all the things wrong with me I focus on them and can’t let them go
I’ll hold on to them to the grave
And I will obsess
Obsess on things people say don’t matter
Well they do matter, they matter to me
I wish they didn’t but they do, and I can get over them.
These little imperfections are what **** me the most…
Mar 12, 2013
Mar 12, 2013 at 12:06 AM UTC
I keep cutting.
I know I should shop.
But my eyes only follow the clock.
Hoping time will end, I cut deeper and deeper.
Then tic toc tic
…The End…
Mar 12, 2013
Mar 12, 2013 at 12:03 AM UTC
Does it ever end?
This feeling I never win. I try to live day to day.
But it’s getting harder and all I can do is pray.
Pray it won’t hurt one day.
Mar 12, 2013
Mar 12, 2013 at 12:01 AM UTC
This world needs to experience true pain.
It is too safe, sheltered by hate
Mar 11, 2013
Mar 11, 2013 at 11:59 PM UTC
The storm went on for hours an endless night. The pain and sorrow poured out of the ominous clouds, covering this dying worlds. The hate for the people who have ruined this world, voiced by the roaring thunder. This is my life, the grayness taking over. Beautiful life ripped from its roots. I let out a silent cry for the damages done.
Mar 11, 2013
Mar 11, 2013 at 11:57 PM UTC
The cruel words you’re spiting at me make me wince and wonder what I’ve done wrong. Like poison it sinks into my veins, burning and decomposing as it goes. My tears start to fall like rain, you start up again, word harsh words coming. Ugly, useless, fat, stupid. They whip me as they sling out of your mouth. You’re finally done and you yell at me to get out of your sight. I let my leaded feet take me to my barren room. Nothing significant, just white. Like an insane asylum cell. I grab my blanket off the floor and wrap myself in it and just let the tears flow. I curl up, screaming my heart out. It all goes blank. Just lying there, Quiet, finally I open my eyes and look at the door and slowly walk to my bathroom, I turn on the hot water. I limply shed each article of clothing and walk sluggishly to the awaiting bath tub. I fall into it and just sit. Thinking of everything that has happened. I stare down at the secluded razor at the corner of my tub. I gaze at it longingly and then grab it. I tare in to the skin of my left arm. I watch as the blood flows freely. I laugh at the thought of you finding my lifeless body.
Mar 11, 2013
Mar 11, 2013 at 11:43 PM UTC
My love why have you left me?
I cannot breathe any more
Everything I do hurts
You’re promised that you wouldn’t leave, that you’d love me forever
But you lied.
You lied to me.
You’re not here, not anymore
I sit in cry in my dark room
Feelings brood around me and I don’t know what to do
I’m wondering what I have done wrong
I glace at my bathroom door
I get up and let myself walk to that door
I start the water and rest in it
But it’s not helping, just making my tears flow more, so much more
I think of this warmth, warmth that used to be provide by you
But now it’s just cold, cold and lonely
I look to my side where a lonely piece of metal sits
I grab it and clutch it to my now erratic chest
I let it slide across my skin, everywhere I can reach.
I see the bath water turn red and I silently sigh
I let go
Mar 11, 2013
Mar 11, 2013 at 11:11 PM UTC
Tears fall down my face
Roll down my cheek
The pain I feel is nothing compared to anything I’ve felt before
It hurts so much, excruciating pain
Make it stop
Please.
It’s unbearable
Tears falling so care free
I don’t want to feel this
Just let me be numb
Mar 10, 2013
Mar 10, 2013 at 7:13 PM UTC
Love is painful
Yet you never run away from it
You welcome it, with open arms
Naive to the pain that you will suffer
Naive to the hurt you will face
You want it to feel like it did when you first fell in love. But it will never feel like that, trust me
Never again
Mar 10, 2013
Mar 10, 2013 at 7:06 PM UTC