amber-r-smith-dc - Hello Poetry

Strong and tall as a brick wall she stands. alone and scared no one ever cared she cried inside. a child left all ears around deaf no one could hear. winds whistled, rain poured, lighting crashed, tornados landed. still standing tall she won’t ever fall she is more she is better than those who left her ten years from now she will be better than the products of her past.

0

Feb 25, 2014

Feb 25, 2014 at 12:00 PM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

It rained, it poured, she's there (written 2004)

Strong and tall as a brick wall she stands. alone and scared no one ever cared she cried inside. a child left all ears around deaf no one could hear. winds whistled, rain poured, lighting crashed, tornados landed. still standing tall she won’t ever fall she is more she is better than those who left her ten years from now she will be better than the products of her past.

24

It seemed like any other night, light run in pink shorts and sports bra sweat dripping from the natural sauna called Texas heat. Feeling a connection to the earth, to God. Pure bliss at the beauty of the deer gracefully crossing the street, The birds singing and kids laughter. In a matter of minutes dark clouds shifted over me, over my mind, my heart. Shifted the reality of running to A darkness of emotions and fear. A whirl wind spinning in circles strong winds, Strong thoughts rain whipping sideways piercing fire emotions pouring, tears pouring, Niagara Falls. The challenges of being the boss of running a clinic Taking risks in life and in love Having a broken heart, not knowing how to mend it Fear of insecurities and doubts on abilities Can I handle this vision, this clear vision God has Put on my heart. Emotions overcome. Doubt sets in. Fear becomes reality. Am I enough? Did I get the right vision? God are you sure it’s me your Sending this to? Why the doubts on something so perfect, Something that fell into my life so easily, All the right people have appeared, The perfect team to complete and tackle another clinic, more patient’s, more responsibility. But I long for something else, something deeper, Still and yet with success and passion, A missing piece to my life, no words can explain, Only a longing for something unknown. A person? A thing? A connection? A friend? An accomplishment? At this point the storm rages on as I sit alone tonight. As I sit and write, my main outlet in the world.

0

Feb 20, 2014

Feb 20, 2014 at 6:18 PM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Atypical evening run

It seemed like any other night, light run in pink shorts and sports bra sweat dripping from the natural sauna called Texas heat. Feeling a connection to the earth, to God. Pure bliss at the beauty of the deer gracefully crossing the street, The birds singing and kids laughter. In a matter of minutes dark clouds shifted over me, over my mind, my heart. Shifted the reality of running to A darkness of emotions and fear. A whirl wind spinning in circles strong winds, Strong thoughts rain whipping sideways piercing fire emotions pouring, tears pouring, Niagara Falls. The challenges of being the boss of running a clinic Taking risks in life and in love Having a broken heart, not knowing how to mend it Fear of insecurities and doubts on abilities Can I handle this vision, this clear vision God has Put on my heart. Emotions overcome. Doubt sets in. Fear becomes reality. Am I enough? Did I get the right vision? God are you sure it’s me your Sending this to? Why the doubts on something so perfect, Something that fell into my life so easily, All the right people have appeared, The perfect team to complete and tackle another clinic, more patient’s, more responsibility. But I long for something else, something deeper, Still and yet with success and passion, A missing piece to my life, no words can explain, Only a longing for something unknown. A person? A thing? A connection? A friend? An accomplishment? At this point the storm rages on as I sit alone tonight. As I sit and write, my main outlet in the world.

46

A simple look across a crowded group those eyes like magnets locked on One look was all it took my mind now plays in twisted loops Visions of sugar plums and dancing fairies, floating in the clouds up high above the heavens Lounging, floating feeding each other berries, and feeling like a dream never foreseen Back to reality her hand touches mine small bumps cover my entire body Chills of excitement and confusion Could this be so divine? Skins soft as satin Beauty far reaching Eyes of tender love Warm glow of light from above As her body moves closer to mine My heart starts to race Palms start to sweat My stomach tied in knots Her touch I’ve longed for For so many years The sudden feeling of completeness and that emptiness now full Star gazing said to be for dreamers Real love said to be a mystery A good woman said to be extinct Does my heart and eyes deceive me? I believe in the world of negativity In the world of heartache There is still true love There is still the fairy tale ending Can you find yours?

0

Feb 20, 2014

Feb 20, 2014 at 6:08 PM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Fairy Tale

A simple look across a crowded group those eyes like magnets locked on One look was all it took my mind now plays in twisted loops Visions of sugar plums and dancing fairies, floating in the clouds up high above the heavens Lounging, floating feeding each other berries, and feeling like a dream never foreseen Back to reality her hand touches mine small bumps cover my entire body Chills of excitement and confusion Could this be so divine? Skins soft as satin Beauty far reaching Eyes of tender love Warm glow of light from above As her body moves closer to mine My heart starts to race Palms start to sweat My stomach tied in knots Her touch I’ve longed for For so many years The sudden feeling of completeness and that emptiness now full Star gazing said to be for dreamers Real love said to be a mystery A good woman said to be extinct Does my heart and eyes deceive me? I believe in the world of negativity In the world of heartache There is still true love There is still the fairy tale ending Can you find yours?

33

Finger tips frolic freely, Skin to skin stimulates, Thoughts of touching, feeling your lips on mine, The warmth of your body, Like a fire in the deep winter months, Staring into your eyes Brightly shinning sensitivity Alone in my method of transportation Radio flipped on, speakers blaring, Nickleback songs take me away, On a flying rug overlooking downtown Houston, Watching, wasting… Even way up over this town, I feel you My separate spirit You’re separate spirit Above the cycling city I pull you, toward me My hands hold My breath, it blows on your ears My lips caress your neck, slow to move forward Drum roles sound in the distance, A violinist appears He begins to serenade with a sinful sonnet Softly the bow rubs each string The world, at that moment, stopped all movement Lip to Lip Arm in Arm When tiny tingles cover our bodies Fireworks explode, as if it was the 4th of july, In the middle of December. Day or night, naughty thoughts Flustered or flattered, emotions create it Regrets no more Fear no more Back down to earth, now I am, I drive you, my destiny.

0

Feb 20, 2014

Feb 20, 2014 at 11:50 AM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Miraculous

Finger tips frolic freely, Skin to skin stimulates, Thoughts of touching, feeling your lips on mine, The warmth of your body, Like a fire in the deep winter months, Staring into your eyes Brightly shinning sensitivity Alone in my method of transportation Radio flipped on, speakers blaring, Nickleback songs take me away, On a flying rug overlooking downtown Houston, Watching, wasting… Even way up over this town, I feel you My separate spirit You’re separate spirit Above the cycling city I pull you, toward me My hands hold My breath, it blows on your ears My lips caress your neck, slow to move forward Drum roles sound in the distance, A violinist appears He begins to serenade with a sinful sonnet Softly the bow rubs each string The world, at that moment, stopped all movement Lip to Lip Arm in Arm When tiny tingles cover our bodies Fireworks explode, as if it was the 4th of july, In the middle of December. Day or night, naughty thoughts Flustered or flattered, emotions create it Regrets no more Fear no more Back down to earth, now I am, I drive you, my destiny.

34

Sitting down amongst the plush green grass Bare feet creeping, towards the shoreline toes of bright pink dancing, exactly with the rhythm in my head The sun slowly creeping down orange and red fills, the space between the clouds Quite peaceful bliss angels crying a slight mist for the sun will be missed, as stars soon overtake the sky Leaning forward in the pond, I peak at what the water’s Ripples have to say To my surprise the reflection startles my soul and questions my existence For is this the one I have become? So many times with struggles and the hard times I have seen I feel so weak and fragile, Unworthy and afraid, of everything even my own shadow The tribulations of childhood tears and abuse The times my heart has Been torn from my chest, and left to die Loved ones I have lost, my grandma I loved so much Each of these things left scars, each lesson took a piece of me For sure with all of this all of life The scars would show, for everyone to see Yet and still as I reflect at this pond the person that I see so clearly now Looks so strong and independent I see no scars of pain or abuse I see no reason for this image The image I’ve carried for so long All these years I’ve tried to hide behind this mask of pain of fear of regret Yet and still this whole time, these years, these hours, these minutes no need to hide Naked here in nature I confess to the pond the trees the grass I proclaim and reclaim This life of mine This life as I am without the mask.

0

Feb 20, 2014

Feb 20, 2014 at 10:58 AM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Reflections of the pond

Sitting down amongst the plush green grass Bare feet creeping, towards the shoreline toes of bright pink dancing, exactly with the rhythm in my head The sun slowly creeping down orange and red fills, the space between the clouds Quite peaceful bliss angels crying a slight mist for the sun will be missed, as stars soon overtake the sky Leaning forward in the pond, I peak at what the water’s Ripples have to say To my surprise the reflection startles my soul and questions my existence For is this the one I have become? So many times with struggles and the hard times I have seen I feel so weak and fragile, Unworthy and afraid, of everything even my own shadow The tribulations of childhood tears and abuse The times my heart has Been torn from my chest, and left to die Loved ones I have lost, my grandma I loved so much Each of these things left scars, each lesson took a piece of me For sure with all of this all of life The scars would show, for everyone to see Yet and still as I reflect at this pond the person that I see so clearly now Looks so strong and independent I see no scars of pain or abuse I see no reason for this image The image I’ve carried for so long All these years I’ve tried to hide behind this mask of pain of fear of regret Yet and still this whole time, these years, these hours, these minutes no need to hide Naked here in nature I confess to the pond the trees the grass I proclaim and reclaim This life of mine This life as I am without the mask.

63

Words strike down, thunder bolts of destruction Rejection set in so quick I feel like a **** clown What world have I been living in What rose colored glasses have I had on Obviously living in a dream world With flying pigs and cows jumping over the moon and every other fairy tale dancing in my head The truth be spoken as it should but stings like acid rain, splashing, burning I start screaming out loud, but no one hears it falls on deaf ears so I sit alone in fear, staring at the wall seeing reality and creating a restless mind Sometimes we see things as we want but not as they are And the vision is so strong, it overcomes our rational mind Disguises in the bushes with camouflage And even tricks our heart and taints our emotions With a secret witches potion And then like a rock to a glass window, all the walls fall down And it shatters into a million pieces, pieces that will never be put back together No matter how hard, this glass is now broken No matter the rock cannot be taken back Nor the past changed So the only choice is to accept this broken heart To accept reality and stop living in a dream world Wake up and smell the coffee Move on, pack up for life moves too fast.

0

Feb 20, 2014

Feb 20, 2014 at 10:52 AM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Rose Colored glasses

Words strike down, thunder bolts of destruction Rejection set in so quick I feel like a **** clown What world have I been living in What rose colored glasses have I had on Obviously living in a dream world With flying pigs and cows jumping over the moon and every other fairy tale dancing in my head The truth be spoken as it should but stings like acid rain, splashing, burning I start screaming out loud, but no one hears it falls on deaf ears so I sit alone in fear, staring at the wall seeing reality and creating a restless mind Sometimes we see things as we want but not as they are And the vision is so strong, it overcomes our rational mind Disguises in the bushes with camouflage And even tricks our heart and taints our emotions With a secret witches potion And then like a rock to a glass window, all the walls fall down And it shatters into a million pieces, pieces that will never be put back together No matter how hard, this glass is now broken No matter the rock cannot be taken back Nor the past changed So the only choice is to accept this broken heart To accept reality and stop living in a dream world Wake up and smell the coffee Move on, pack up for life moves too fast.

33

Human Heart, Thick layers, Exodermis, Dermis, Endodermis, all make up the outward, appearance of the human body. hair follicles, finger nails, eye lashes, eye color tiny details unique to each. Four chambers, two ventricles two atriums Pumping fluids, of LIFE to make up the inward, appearance of the human Body. Up top the Cerebrum the cerebellum for balance some right side thinkers some left side thinkers tiny details unique to each. Systems of the body: basic namable items exact terminology can define the human body. Life time’s full of exploration, Still no true explanation, For the puzzle behind, who the human heart will love.

0

Feb 18, 2014

Feb 18, 2014 at 11:56 AM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Human Heart........

Human Heart, Thick layers, Exodermis, Dermis, Endodermis, all make up the outward, appearance of the human body. hair follicles, finger nails, eye lashes, eye color tiny details unique to each. Four chambers, two ventricles two atriums Pumping fluids, of LIFE to make up the inward, appearance of the human Body. Up top the Cerebrum the cerebellum for balance some right side thinkers some left side thinkers tiny details unique to each. Systems of the body: basic namable items exact terminology can define the human body. Life time’s full of exploration, Still no true explanation, For the puzzle behind, who the human heart will love.

39

Finger tip’s gripping tightly but ever so lightly Cut and scraped still holding as pieces of the orange rock cliff crash down below bit by bit Echos of the crumbles, foreshadowing fate hitting rock bottom, shattering is it too late? Drops of ruby red creep out from the torn skin even through the calluses of life So many times I’ve found myself at the edge of this very same cliff with no imagined way out No thoughts on a trick to get out of the thick Desperate to be saved as if it was the only way Crying and asking why must I be left basking in this place The cliff of heartbreak The cliff of distrust The cliff of fear The cliff of misconception The cliff of my minds illusions Still hanging on for dear life, something changes inside A sudden 180 of my thoughts, reality flipped upside down My passion for this life suddenly kicks in high gear and becomes greater than my fear of falling with overcoming the fear my biceps begin to bulge All of the sudden I dig down deep inside inside myself to find a hidden strength Straight from the heavens muscle fibers that were there the whole time All the suffering and poor pitiful me in vain As I lift my own self up from the edge with inner strength I thought was dead Battered by the almost fall Feeling weak and dehydrated From the canyon’s heat My heart beats strong and always did I just wasn’t listening and trusting in myself Hanging on by the edge and feeling dead So close to hitting rock bottom Forced me to look inside for answers The answer we can all learn from We are stronger than we know But we will never know until we are tested.

0

Feb 18, 2014

Feb 18, 2014 at 11:03 AM UTC

amber-r-smith-dc

Barely Hanging on...........

Finger tip’s gripping tightly but ever so lightly Cut and scraped still holding as pieces of the orange rock cliff crash down below bit by bit Echos of the crumbles, foreshadowing fate hitting rock bottom, shattering is it too late? Drops of ruby red creep out from the torn skin even through the calluses of life So many times I’ve found myself at the edge of this very same cliff with no imagined way out No thoughts on a trick to get out of the thick Desperate to be saved as if it was the only way Crying and asking why must I be left basking in this place The cliff of heartbreak The cliff of distrust The cliff of fear The cliff of misconception The cliff of my minds illusions Still hanging on for dear life, something changes inside A sudden 180 of my thoughts, reality flipped upside down My passion for this life suddenly kicks in high gear and becomes greater than my fear of falling with overcoming the fear my biceps begin to bulge All of the sudden I dig down deep inside inside myself to find a hidden strength Straight from the heavens muscle fibers that were there the whole time All the suffering and poor pitiful me in vain As I lift my own self up from the edge with inner strength I thought was dead Battered by the almost fall Feeling weak and dehydrated From the canyon’s heat My heart beats strong and always did I just wasn’t listening and trusting in myself Hanging on by the edge and feeling dead So close to hitting rock bottom Forced me to look inside for answers The answer we can all learn from We are stronger than we know But we will never know until we are tested.

42