Lately I've been trying to forget who you are. Did you know that every seven years the human body replaces each and every cell. I think that's lovely. How invigorating is the thought that I will soon have a body that you have never loved, that you have never touched. However, I've still got years to go and tonight you're the only thing pulsing through my veins. ***** and ***** and ***** is the only thing I can feel. I'm trying to forget you but it seems like the only thing I'm forgetting is my name and how to walk. It's so hard to keep going when you're the only thing on my mind, sober or drunk.
Jul 17, 2014
Jul 17, 2014 at 2:43 AM UTC
A deep ache fuels in my heart and spreads to the ends of my fingers and the tips of my toes.
Everything hurts when I think of you.
I recall the way you laughed with so much force that your shoulders shook with happiness and the way your eyes glinted underneath the Florida stars.
It hurts to know that I won't be able to experience those moments again.
We will never drop everything and run to the beach at 3 AM or drive endlessly with an unknowable destination.
I know that things happen for a reason and pain is inevitable.
We are only living in temporary infinities.
You were never mine to love for a lifetime but in the time I had you, I loved you so **** much.
I'm wishing on these Florida stars tonight. As the waves crash down and the water kisses the shore, I think of you and wish you well in all that you are doing.
You're an unforgettable sliver of my soul.
Jul 16, 2014
Jul 16, 2014 at 4:08 AM UTC
Do you know how deeply it hurts to miss someone even when they are sitting right next to you. I've been on a sadness lately that's uncurable. My chest feels empty and hallow and everything is dark. The dark can be peaceful and soothing but when you're missing someone like hell and feeling alone, it's a suffocating atmosphere. Sometimes I just want to grip you by the shoulders and yell out that I miss you, I miss you terribly. You make me happy and lately the sky's have all been a saddening blue.
Jul 16, 2014
Jul 16, 2014 at 4:06 AM UTC
There isn't a day that goes by where you don't cross my mind. There isn't a night where i don't find myself hankering to call you mine again. When you left, i fell to pieces and those pieces scattered everywhere. I have the habit of looking for you at the bottom of a ***** bottle. Im drowning and my bloods slowly but surely turning to alcohol and before i know it I'm not gonna be able to find those scattered pieces to put myself back together again.
Jul 12, 2014
Jul 12, 2014 at 8:19 PM UTC
I know I hit rock bottom when you looked me in the eyes and told me that I couldn't be what you needed anymore. You used up all my passion on your artwork and all my love for your heart and all my intelligence for your brain. I wasn't cutting it. But she was. She was overflowing with strokes of paint to create a masterpiece and lust filled eyes and she was sharp on her wit which you knew you could use. It was nothing for you to get up and go, to walk away from anything I ever was. I'm not angry and I'm not upset. She was beautiful and still is. Her beautiful heart will hopefully be able to soothe the cracks in yours and let you see that the whole **** world doesn't revolve around your needs. Because **** I needed you but you just left. You left and I'm fine with that because one day I'll be leaving to. Off into the world unknown, where you are unknown to me.
Jul 12, 2014
Jul 12, 2014 at 12:25 AM UTC
thinking of him instantly brought me into a bawling fest & my throat started to choke and i started weasing with tears drowning my face and all i could think about was how our love felt like a fairy tale & now i come to realize that me trying to not miss him only makes me miss him a thousand times more and then my mask falls off, the real me comes out, and it hits me that im so broken and i dont know how much longer i can hide it.
Jul 11, 2014
Jul 11, 2014 at 4:23 AM UTC
"why would you spend your time writing about the things you are trying to forget"
which is what im trying to figure out;
if im actually trying,
or just going through the
motions of "trying."
every thought of you consumes me
and the smell that lingers on your body still hangs around between the sheets where you laid,
unwelcomed.
all i can think about is your ******* fingertips and how you touched my cheek before you left,
telling me it was okay,
when in reality, it never was,
nor will it ever be.
oh but how i loved your sweet lies of
"one day..."
"one day it will be better"
though it seemed as if better
went on a vacation and
never planned on returning home.
Jul 11, 2014
Jul 11, 2014 at 1:07 AM UTC
with someone who's
comfortable with your silence.
someone who doesn't need words
to understand, or the sound of
your voice to hear you.
someone who admires
your makeupless face and
skinny fingers, along with every
bump and scar that has made your body their home, too.
someone who doesn't see all
your flaws as imperfections,
but simply as more to adore.
someone who doesn't need
your words of permission to
know when to kiss you,
or require your arms stretched
open to know when to hold you.
be with someone who grows you
and allows you to spread
your wings to fly, always trusting
that you will come home.
someone that appreciates who
you are and never lets you give
up on that, pushing you to
succeed in your future even if
they aren't any part of it.
someone who makes even the
toughest of times seem hopeful,
and the problems of the world vanish with just a hold of your hand.
*fall in love with someone
who doesn't just kiss your lips,
but your soul.*
Jul 11, 2014
Jul 11, 2014 at 1:00 AM UTC
i can't hold you responsible
for kissing my soul when our lips touched, nor for my fall that followed.
i was the one who let you in, even under the circumstances we were in.
but one day i hope you see flowers, look up at the stars, and are reminded of me. i hope you continue to write on pieces of paper you find, and never doubt yourself. i hope one day you are inspired to write about our first hello and last goodbye. write about the marks we faintly left upon each other with every touch, sinning in the most beautiful way. write how at one time you fell too, and did not try to stand up. write how you tried to love me, how i wanted to love you, but we never could.
Jul 11, 2014
Jul 11, 2014 at 12:53 AM UTC
It's so easy to write about pain
but why write about a dark room
when you have a candle and a match
Jul 11, 2014
Jul 11, 2014 at 12:48 AM UTC