amber
American
My poems are my heart. They may not be perfect, but they are me. / / I joined this site about a month ago under the name "J." If you read my poems and think they sound familiar, it is because they are listed as "J's" poem's as well. It just so happens that "J" forgot her password, so I decided to sign in as myself!
Stubborn and strong
He walked through the world
often misunderstood
For there was always a smile, a smirk
under that serious exterior of his
A heart
full of love
A passion
for the simple things in life
As though it were yesterday
I recall
walking on the boardwalk
trolling across the glassy bay
driving for hours
on our way to nowhere
in seach of ourselves
I hear his voice in my mind
Mighty and deep, yet cracked by life and time
Jokes and stories, reassurance and advice
I search for them there
When I need to smile
When I need to be brave
When I search for answers
I can't find on my own
And now as I write
A tear makes its way down my cheek
Though he's so far away
He's so close in my heart
Freed from a life that ended in sickness and pain
He's so alive withiin me
it's been years since his obnoxious snore awakened the whole house
it's been years since his laughter filled the room
It's been years since he held my tiny hand
And made my world seem alright
I am who I am
Becasue of who he taught me to be.
Feb 19, 2011
Feb 19, 2011 at 7:02 PM UTC
I used to have a perfect friend
Who was special in every way
Someone to share my dreams with
Someone to tell my secrets to
Someone to fill my mind with ease
As I drifted to sleep at night
Someone who shared my sorrow
And had sorrow of their own
Someone I could be vulnerable with
Who had insecurities of their own
But my special friend has gone
I'm not sure what he's become
Someone who is angry
Someone who is bitter
Someone who could be so much more
If only he'd give it a try
Someone who had my friendship
And tossed it to the side
But...
We're working on it.
Feb 4, 2011
Feb 4, 2011 at 7:26 AM UTC
What are you
Five years old?
I surpassed your games long ago.
You sit in your lonely room
Hundreds of pretend friends
but really it's only you.
I walk through the woods
I smell the salty air
I feel the moisture of the water enveloped by my pores
The earth is a part of me
I share all of me with the many
who love me.
Who do you have?
No one.
Your keyboard.
Your webcam.
Your cat.
No one.
Grow the hell up.
I'll be living my life
while you dwell in your darkness.
Jan 4, 2011
Jan 4, 2011 at 5:53 PM UTC
I met someone today
Someone I've known forever, yet never really known
she was a beautiful girl, yet she wrapped
herself in a blanket of insecurity
She was a determined girl, yet dependant on
everyone but herself
She was an affectionate girl, yet gave love to all but
those who were derserving
She was an eloquent girl, yet she impressed
for all the wrong reasons
I stood in the mirror, staring at her, staring at me
And all I thought was how very little I envied her
How self-concious and plain and naive she was
I looked at her and decided
We'd never meet again.
Dec 8, 2010
Dec 8, 2010 at 7:33 PM UTC
I could lose myself
in her soft green eyes
in her dimples when she smiles
in the little hints of baby that are still clinging
to her face.
I could lose myself
in her infectious laugh
in her deep, giggly voice
in the scent of her hair that smells like shampoo,
and sweat, and ketchup
I could lose myself
in her dreams of glitter and princes
in her songs that make no sense
in her stories that go on, and on,
and on
I could lose myself
in thoughts of who she'll be one day
in thoughts of her hopes and dreams
in thoughts of the boy
who will steal her heart.
I watch her as she sleeps
her breath even and slow
her face so soft and serious
I lay here next to her,
and I get lost.
Oct 21, 2010
Oct 21, 2010 at 9:17 AM UTC
Isn't it insane,
this suffering, this pain?
Some live truly to live
Others want only to die
People who long to take
from others who will cry
There is no one to blame
Life is just a game
Humans are tiny chess pieces
scattered about a board
Separate, yet intertwined
They never last forever
Have you ever lied
to get what you want?
Do you live in regret
of life's many wrongs?
We cheat, we steal
We wound, we heal
We're gone just as fast as we got here
Where will we be one hundred years from now?
Dead, gone, forgotten
No one will be remembered
No one at all
Old ancient pictures lost
in old dusty drawers.
Oct 15, 2010
Oct 15, 2010 at 1:19 PM UTC
Like water through the pores
of the land
I run through you
Like a worker on and endless
line
I am constant
Like blood pulsing through the veins
of your body
I am life
Oct 15, 2010
Oct 15, 2010 at 1:19 PM UTC
Old paneled walls, worn and weathered
Infinite grains of sand littering my wood floors
The mud that dirties my pant legs on a rainy day
Slimy, soggy, mold-ridden bananas
Rot, Rotten, Rotted
All lead to the essence of brown.
Oct 15, 2010
Oct 15, 2010 at 1:17 PM UTC
Who are you?
Peeking out from behind
Those dark daring eyes
Waiting
Hoping
Knowing
Life will soon begin
Something new, different
Away from the dullness
That surrounds you
Who are you?
Behind that face of gold
Your heart pounding
Desires reaching out
Waiting
Hoping
Knowing
Something new will overcome
Changing that golden tone
Shedding light on what remains
Oct 15, 2010
Oct 15, 2010 at 1:16 PM UTC
Chameleon blue eyes
that transform to the shade of my mood
cesspools of dark that long for sleep
Lips plain and pink
tight with dryness
crying to be clothed with chap-stick
A nose that screams for attention
large and proud
awkwardly placed on a small face
Skin that reminds me of
Amber
Oct 15, 2010
Oct 15, 2010 at 1:10 PM UTC