abigail-ward - Hello Poetry

today its self-hatred tomorrow its love maybe I feel overweight or fall back into old habits of destruction. sad nights where I lie and wait for something other than numb, good nights where I lay with friends laughing over something dumb Even though the happy emotions come they do not keep the darkness from creeping up behind me and whispering in my ear the old morbid thoughts I always used to hear. then the dark clouds fade away into the brightest day where nothing could ever go wrong until instantly and randomly my moods change. I'm sick of laughing till I cry and crying till I laugh. this illness thinks my life is a game but there's nothing I can do to fight back.

0

Apr 26, 2019

Apr 26, 2019 at 1:50 AM UTC

living with bipolar disorder

today its self-hatred tomorrow its love maybe I feel overweight or fall back into old habits of destruction. sad nights where I lie and wait for something other than numb, good nights where I lay with friends laughing over something dumb Even though the happy emotions come they do not keep the darkness from creeping up behind me and whispering in my ear the old morbid thoughts I always used to hear. then the dark clouds fade away into the brightest day where nothing could ever go wrong until instantly and randomly my moods change. I'm sick of laughing till I cry and crying till I laugh. this illness thinks my life is a game but there's nothing I can do to fight back.

8

Even when we are miles away I will still have the comfort of looking up at the stars knowing that wherever you are we are looking up at the same sky.

0

Jan 12, 2019

Jan 12, 2019 at 10:15 PM UTC

distance

Even when we are miles away I will still have the comfort of looking up at the stars knowing that wherever you are we are looking up at the same sky.

1

you pushed yourself onto me after school in a hallway your breathe smelled like like **** you stroked my hair and asked if i was single while calling me baby girl but I didn't have the power to lie and say no instead a lifeless yes was forced out of my mouth you an eighteen year old stranger taking advantage of me a fifteen year old. I was only 15 when I was ruined by you. A fifteen year old girl already struggling, a girl who only wanted to go home and cry when you pushed yourself onto me kissing my head, my neck I was paralyzed you pushed me up against those lockers as I pushed back my tears.

0

Jan 4, 2018

Jan 4, 2018 at 12:07 AM UTC

800 Hall

you pushed yourself onto me after school in a hallway your breathe smelled like like **** you stroked my hair and asked if i was single while calling me baby girl but I didn't have the power to lie and say no instead a lifeless yes was forced out of my mouth you an eighteen year old stranger taking advantage of me a fifteen year old. I was only 15 when I was ruined by you. A fifteen year old girl already struggling, a girl who only wanted to go home and cry when you pushed yourself onto me kissing my head, my neck I was paralyzed you pushed me up against those lockers as I pushed back my tears.

4

Take another sip see what happens to your family, your friends Because while you drown in ***** they are drowning in sorrow and when you remove your lips from that bottle you do not find peace, tranquility, happiness instead you find regret, anger, and sadness So tell me why Why are we addicted to the things that will **** us and pain the outside world

0

Nov 14, 2017

Nov 14, 2017 at 12:18 AM UTC

Poison

Take another sip see what happens to your family, your friends Because while you drown in ***** they are drowning in sorrow and when you remove your lips from that bottle you do not find peace, tranquility, happiness instead you find regret, anger, and sadness So tell me why Why are we addicted to the things that will **** us and pain the outside world

12

I made a sharp blade dull for him I tried to continue doing what I was told for him Until the sharp blade turned dull And then that sharp blade turned red he stopped playing video games and turned his head his next request write words on my leg then the sharp blade turned dull and he left he wasn't there to clean up the blood he wasn't there to bandage the wound he wasn't there to pick me up off the cold ground he wasn't there when I did it again.

0

Nov 12, 2017

Nov 12, 2017 at 11:17 PM UTC

Yet I Loved Him

I made a sharp blade dull for him I tried to continue doing what I was told for him Until the sharp blade turned dull And then that sharp blade turned red he stopped playing video games and turned his head his next request write words on my leg then the sharp blade turned dull and he left he wasn't there to clean up the blood he wasn't there to bandage the wound he wasn't there to pick me up off the cold ground he wasn't there when I did it again.

11