It hurts
Even after all this time
After telling myself I'm fine
It still hurts
I still feel it in my heart
Emotions out of my control
Tearing my apart
Taking its toll
Why do I still feel this way?
Why do I still care?
Maybe I need more apathy
Maybe this isn't fair
Nov 25, 2017
Nov 25, 2017 at 2:41 AM UTC
I enter my room
And close the door
And start screaming
"Everything is gonna be okay"
No....
"Everything is okay"
"Every....thing... is... okay..."
As my tears starts flowing
"E..ve...ry... thing.... is....o..kay..."
I keep saying that to myself
But why?
Why is it so hard to lie to myself?
Nov 21, 2017
Nov 21, 2017 at 1:55 PM UTC
Go away
(Don't go)
I don't want you
(I need you)
I hate you
(I love you)
I'm fine
(I'm broken)
I'm strong
(I'm weak)
Don't worry about me
(Please care about me)
I don't want your help
(I need your help)
Nov 19, 2017
Nov 19, 2017 at 9:08 PM UTC
How long have I been broken for
Can I even be fixed?
When did this all start
Or have I always been this?
Nov 19, 2017
Nov 19, 2017 at 11:26 AM UTC
Still here, still alive
Still not happy
Still can't cry
Still here, still alive
Still no meaning
Still can't try
Still here, still alive
Still dead inside
But still can't die
Nov 19, 2017
Nov 19, 2017 at 11:26 AM UTC
Finding a reason to live is hard
When the weight of it all can leave you scarred
Happiness is often just a dream
One that some people can't quite gleam
Life may have its ups and downs
Sometimes it feels like we're going to drown
But through it all, we must carry on
As time passes, we'll find a new dawn
Nov 18, 2017
Nov 18, 2017 at 11:21 PM UTC
On Monday, I was 10 minutes early
No one noticed
No one cared
On Tuesday, I was 5 minutes early
No one noticed
No one cared
On Wednesday, I was just on time
No one noticed
No one cared
Today I was 5 minutes late
No one noticed
No one cared
Tomorrow, I won't even go
Will anyone notice?
Will anyone care?
Nov 18, 2017
Nov 18, 2017 at 4:43 AM UTC
I am but a fool
My heart, your play tool
But I'm not going to cry
No need to apologize
Should've kept my heart more closely guarded
Instead of letting it be bombarded
With emotions I cant control
I should have closed my heart and soul
As time passes on I will understand
And I hope we can carry on as friends
Nov 9, 2017
Nov 9, 2017 at 2:56 AM UTC
I don't know how to express myself
Is this love or something else?
Its hard to tell how I feel about you
Or know how you feel about me too
My heart is so easily fooled
Been burned before, played like a tool
Maybe I'm just being stupid and obsessive
The things I feel are a little excessive
My day's a little brighter whenever you're near
But to break my heart again is my biggest fear
Whatever this is, I'll keep coming back
Even if it makes my heart turn black
Nov 6, 2017
Nov 6, 2017 at 10:57 PM UTC
What if I told you I wanted to die?
To end my life early by my own hand
What if I told you that when everyone who cares about me
Passes away or forgets about me
I would simply fade away
Is it wrong of me to think this? Selfish?
Perhaps I only say this as an excuse to not try in life
To not attempt to make something of myself
I know that I could, but...
I continuously use the excuse that it doesn't matter...
What if, for once, I wasn't afraid to try?
Nov 3, 2017
Nov 3, 2017 at 11:45 PM UTC