My mind is stuck between the everlasting feelings of admiration and the cold wonder of hesitation
What is going on with me?
The feelings that I used to trust so much have become nothing but mere suggestions and a hunch
What is going on with me?
It should just be so simple
To recognize and act on every symbol
But the fact is that it is not always so simple
And the feelings that once were my closest friend have become a stranger in a familiar place
I shouldn’t have to reintroduce myself to my feelings
What will I even say?
As I glaze up at the ceiling I sit and ponder
Will I ever come up with a solution for this worry and wonder
I run on heart alone
Because my brain deceives me
But as cracked and weathered as an old stone
My heart is beginning to be
I need to restore it
Give it new light
Bring it to a place where it can restore
And give it something to see
I need to turn this stone heart into a flourishing plant
Never to be killed because the light will never disappear
But that future doesn’t appear to be near
So for now I will just sit, waiting, wondering, over here.
Oct 31, 2016
Oct 31, 2016 at 2:33 PM UTC
A friend I once thought to be true
Turned out to be unreliable and crude
Someone who provided a sense of false hope
But ended up taking me on a downhill slop
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised
Most people are taken on a ride
And we’re told a false right
When we’re losing what makes us bright
It’s part of life
It occurs every day until we see that final light
And some people will cover the windows and make you think it’s night
And they will make you believe they are right
Ultimately we are forced to find out who is a true friend
One who will be there until the end
Ones who will help our broken hearts mend
And be there, despite our disagreements, to hold our hands.
Jan 26, 2016
Jan 26, 2016 at 8:42 PM UTC
I am coming to the end of a road many have travelled upon
Hardly beginning to fathom the magnitude of what’s to come
It feels like I’m waking up at the brink of dawn
Unsure of the day which has yet to arrive.
The final semester of a twelve-year journey
I remember a time when I didn’t want to think of the future
But now with the future close enough to see
I realize that my confidence is not as pure
It’s easy to think of what you’re going to do when you graduate
Talking is easy
What about when it actually happens?
Most people like to talk about being a daredevil, but hardly ever do it.
Graduation is like my daredevil moment
It’s like I’m jumping out of a plane without a parachute
And I don’t know where I’m going to land or what I’m going to do when I land
And all I have to guide me is my head and my own two hands.
I’ve always had a plan in life
I’ve always known what I wanted to be
But why is it when the opportunity is in my face
That I am cowering under the idea?
Why is it that the boldness I once had
Has turned into fear?
Why is it that the person I wanted to be come
No longer feels achievable in my head?
Maybe I’m just in shock
Graduation is nearly here
All I can do now is watch the clock
As the time grows near.
Jan 3, 2016
Jan 3, 2016 at 12:54 AM UTC
A broken soul
As cold as coal
Someone's striking at the hull
The boat's beginning to stall.
Lost at sea
With nothing to see
Feeling all alone
Without any sense of hope.
No sense of comfort
Unsure of how to triumph
This growing cold
That afflicts this poor soul
But alas,
A ship comes at last
Filled with souls of the same past
They arrive in such a mass.
"We're here to help," they say
But the soul will not leave today
The soul is scared
Unwilling to give a chance fair.
"Don't be scared," they say.
"You're not alone," they say.
Do they know the pain?
Do they know the way?
Do they take the poor soul
Into a world unknown?
Do they trick the poor soul
To going to another ship alone?
"We will protect you," they say.
"We promise," they seem to know the way.
But seeming and knowing are two different things
Are they to be trusted?
They look like the souls who abandoned the poor soul before
But they act with sincerity
They are unbeknownst to the poor soul
Yet they come with a sort of protection.
"I'll come with you," the poor soul says.
"But I am scared."
"Do not fear," they reply.
"We are here."
As the poor soul grabs the accompanying hand
The sun begins to rise
"Maybe," she says,
"My world doesn't have to be so dark after all."
Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 2:50 PM UTC
Forever we sit
Above an eternal pit
On a trembling floor
That one day will break in a fit
The floor is unstable
It comes with no label
It is simply known as “life”
And it’s too much to handle
At the point which it caves in
We begin to fall
I don’t know what will happen then
But I know that we can’t grab the wall.
Life has a way of surprising us
We think it’s stable and that’s when it’s the most weak
It crumbles when our happiness has reached a peak
Your balance you’re forced to keep.
So stand on this ground
Stand while you can
For when it finally collapses
You should not regret standing on your feet.
Mar 31, 2015
Mar 31, 2015 at 12:20 PM UTC
Atlas is missing
The sky is falling
The world is crumbling
My heart is breaking
Rivers form from my eyes
Sniffles emanate from my nose
It won’t get better
Not much can help
A feeling unlike any previously experienced
How does one handle it?
When someone who you love dearly
Will soon be up above?
Someday I’ll be okay
But it is not this day
For now I lie in bed
And hate the waiting.
Mar 26, 2015
Mar 26, 2015 at 12:14 PM UTC
The world we live in
No matter what it continues to spin
Not enough time to wonder what could have been
If one has no time to live, what then?
We are on a thin line
Able to perish by even a small pine
Sometimes we like to feel divine
But we all reach an end to our time.
We must learn to cherish it
Not by laying back and taking a hit
Not by living your life like a skit
But by using your wit.
We are promised no second
We must live as if we have no second
Learn what we can
And not be reckless.
Enjoy life
It is the only one we have
It all can end so fast
Don’t let one dumb mistake be your last.
Mar 13, 2015
Mar 13, 2015 at 12:02 PM UTC
At this time we cry
We cry right along with the sky
Why the sky cries, we don’t know why
But I think I know what it’s caused by.
He’s up there
Sad because he knows where
Watching over his loved ones
And friends lacking a bright sun
The clouds are grey
Nobody knows what to say
Nobody knows how to express in any way
But to lose a tear and forget about their day
His tears come in the form of rain
He sees our pain
The amount of response is insane
His fate has brought together a community
Those who are unfamiliar of his name
Still lower their head in the rain
Those who don’t know his name
Still run tears down their face
However, there is always light in the dark
While right now seems impossible
There has been some good to come out of it
Together a community has come, bonding and strong.
So let us all put our hands together
Cherish each other
Enjoy life
For at one second, it could all be gone.
Mar 13, 2015
Mar 13, 2015 at 12:00 PM UTC
day after day
i rumble on
bags under eyes
getting bigger and bigger
i cant think
i cant sleep
my body deprived
of its comforting sleep
during the day i dream
about what its like
to rest my head
on a soft cool pillow
and dreasm of
sweet dreams
during countless
sleepless nights
Mar 10, 2015
Mar 10, 2015 at 12:08 PM UTC
The day is dark
The people with their heads down
The future has no spark
The circumstances cause a frown
We are promised no second
Spared no consequence
Anything can happen
And it could happen tomorrow
A friend who I hardly knew
Yet a friend still
Now rests in the clouds
Leaving his friends with their heads down
There’s not a lot someone can say
At least not today
We all have a lease,
And for him, rest in peace.
Mar 10, 2015
Mar 10, 2015 at 12:07 PM UTC