Tossing and turning,
she dreams about her time in her hometown
her time with /him/
and the promises that had been severed.
Only when she awakens,
eyes brimming with tears
does she realize that the hand outstretched
towards the other had been gripping
onto the fabric of her sheets.
-- Ｔｈｅ Ｅｘｉｌｅ
Jun 6, 2018
Jun 6, 2018 at 9:29 PM UTC
"And I'll be holding onto you" -- Tшεптч ∅пε Pıʟøтƨ
Whether you allow me to hold on to you,
I will not let go.
All this pain, let me in.. it could be just us two.
You are allowing for this pain to **** you slow.
It hurts to see you suffering like this.
I'm here on the edge of a cliff,
my hand gripping onto yours tightly.
I'm trying to pull you up, but you're so stiff.
Please, let me see,
let me see your face..
Don't look away, hold on.
I'll stay here as long as it takes.
You're not gone,
not because of some silly mistake.
She's gone, she's no longer a part of you.
I'll keep holding onto the thing that matters to me the most.
That thing, is you...open your eyes.
I'm right in front of you, I'm not a ghost.
I'm human, my cries...
they are real.
I'm real.
I'm the person that's holding your hand from slipping off the cliff.
Aug 11, 2015
Aug 11, 2015 at 2:23 PM UTC
I fell in love with a boy I knew, could never be mine.
At some point, I thought it was fine.
I didn't want my heart on the line.
For I knew that it was a sign.
What chance did he have of coming inside these walls of mine?
After everything that he has done because of his last "mistake",
how can I allow him to come back into my life?
Her words were enough to finally make him break,
it made him realize that he stabbed my back with a knife.
I gave him my trust, my life...
He wanted to make things right, so.. just this once, I let him try.
As expected, he found me cold and distant.
I wanted to ask him...why?
My feelings at this point, were non-existent.
To what extent, is he willing to go?
As time passed by, he began to tear at my walls.
Was I ready to let him inside...
Inside these stonewalls,
the deeper he went, the more I wanted him outside.
He was close to reaching the wall I no longer allowed anyone inside.
But no matter how hard I tried to make him stop,
he allowed himself inside without any problem.
My world came tumbling into a flop.
The feeling of being numb,
it's gone... Replaced with an actual heart.
My walls were tore down,
I thought my castle would be safe and he would protect me himself.
He did the opposite and let me drown,
a dragon, a problem...manifested itself.
I knew I was on my own.
He was too scared to face it head on,
face these feelings he had going on in his heart.
He was so far gone.
It tore him apart,
and caused him to recreate his own walls.
Disappointed, the girl began to cry.
How was it fair to him to do such a thing?
Leave her to die,
that was probably the best thing for his heart contained no meaning...
No meaning to the relationship they began to grow.
So now she's the one fighting for him,
fighting to tear down the walls he built up.
This was grim,
she was upon the last wall.
A wall similar to hers, the one she did not allow anyone in.
The best way to get rid of this wall was to wait,
because within time, the rock hard wall would sound erode.
This was her sealed fate,
it was too late to go down another road.
She knew where her heart was and she was willing to wait for her chance.
But yet...
There is another part...
No matter how much I tried to deny these feelings,
they're there.
He refuses to have any feelings now because it stings...
There's a pain in my chest that I find hard to bear.
The walls for me are becoming higher and harder than before.
Aug 11, 2015
Aug 11, 2015 at 11:06 AM UTC
Narcissism - extreme selfishness, with a grandiose view of one's own talents and a craving for admiration, as characterizing a personality type.
...
So, it means someone who's focused on themselves?
Not even caring about those around them?
Reading the information from the books on the shelves,
so does that mean, our relationship was to be condemned?
Apparently to you, it was already broken from the beginning.
I poured everything out to you,
my past scars and secrets...
And then out of the blue,
you unveil a weakness.
A weakness that you knew was an illness.
Three days was all it took,
for you to already destroy my heart once more.
You promised you wouldn't, you crook.
But you thought I was a bore,
because you would crave change.
At first I thought, your narcissism was cute...
I didn't see a problem at all.
You were as sweet as fruit,
but then I realized they were empty words,
and I began to bawl.
You have taught me something,
and that is to never trust a narcissist.
Because in the end it was for nothing,
for they are artists.
Able to persuade you into believing something is real.
When in reality, you were just a target for them.
May 16, 2015
May 16, 2015 at 12:18 PM UTC
'Cause you're such a pretty face,
but you turned into a pretty big waste
of my time...
Your kind,
it's just the worst and lowest type.
Changing everyone for your benefit.
I hope your pretty face and yourself falls into a pit.
One filled with darkness,
so your so called "kindness"
becomes jaded with the pit's starkness.
Your pretty face,
one that brings disgrace.
One with...hazel colored eyes...
It led to my demise.
After so long, I can't help but to cry.
It's the same face, that I used to kiss.
Those lips, I dearly miss.
Why did it have to be like this.
Us, not even talking,
it's now just walking...
Further and further away.
I still remember the day,
I met your pretty face.
One that could be easily replaced.
Your pretty face, I would love to do nothing more than spray you with mace. (:
Feb 27, 2015
Feb 27, 2015 at 7:15 PM UTC