I've been holding on to this for way too long.
My hearts aching and my eyes are filled with tears but i try my best to keep them in.
To avoid all the questions and the assumptions.
I cant bare it any longer i just want to scream,cry and do nothing all at the same time.
You ever feel empty? I guess you don't , because there is nothing worse then feeling empty.
You feel nothing and everything all at once ,your completely numb and are unable to do anything but to lay in the dark all alone in your room tears falling from your eyes beyond your control ,feeling sorry for yourself .
I always find myself feeling tired, even after i wake up, this isn't a normal kind of tired that a nap solves. It's being tired of being drained emotionally and mentally from everything and everyone.
Sometime i find myself feeling empty and tired all at once and i should feeling those too at once is a different kind of pain.
Jan 7, 2020
Jan 7, 2020 at 11:15 AM UTC
Sitting in front of
The people I love
Hiding from them
My feelings in a cove
The sadness seeps
Up from my broken heart
To my eyes as they search
For a place to start
A place to start
With a knife in my hand
The thin lines as the pierce
The blood pooling in the sand
You hide them the next day
The cuts along your arms
To make sure no one sees them
You raise your alarm
Not a day goes by
That you don't see the scars
From so many years ago
Straight lines across your arms
Years later you know
How the cuts didn't help
All they did was curse you
With the pain that you felt
Each day a reminder
Of the way you made
Made yourself feel better
By giving yourself pain
Scarred for life
Both mentally and physically
You now know why you should never
Never show your vulnerability
Apr 16, 2019
Apr 16, 2019 at 1:50 AM UTC
You think that one day
Your heart might stop
Sometimes you can be scared
And sometimes you’re not
Sometimes you want to die
Sometimes you don’t
It depends on who you’re with
And what’s going on
Being depressed
Or bipolar isn’t easy
It isn’t fun either
Always ruining moments
You want to know why
You’re life’s upside down
But you can never find out
Because you can’t slow down
Know you’re not alone
There are others like you
Who want to be happy
But have no reason to
Apr 16, 2019
Apr 16, 2019 at 1:50 AM UTC
One day when I'm no more.
You will wonder where it all went wrong
With out you knowing you were the cause
You all are the reason why I came to be the way i am
I may smile but that doesn't mean that I'm happy
I may laugh but that doesn't mean it's funny
We all do things without knowing why we do the things we do
But eventually we catch on to what it may seem to be
But when we catch on its evidently late and we keep on thinking of different ways we could have Done with the situation but it won't change a thing
Then we are left with could haves, should haves and would haves
Aug 16, 2018
Aug 16, 2018 at 11:30 PM UTC
I've forgotten to love
It seems way to hard
Without you here
I can't seem to bare
I feel your touch
I smell your scent
I hear you whisper
Before you disappear
As you leave
You take my heart
Leaving a whole inside my chest
And now I'm on a quest
To find what I lost and forgot
Aug 16, 2018
Aug 16, 2018 at 11:18 PM UTC
My love for you flows like a river
Than my heart seems to quiver
I have no clue
If this may be true
But i know for a fact
This is not an act
Aug 16, 2018
Aug 16, 2018 at 11:11 PM UTC
I've known for awhile
But I chose not to speak
The promises you made
Sounded so great
I believed you then
And I still believe you now
But everytime you let me down
A piece of my heart breaks
You said you loved me
But you never proved it
That left me to wonder
If all this pain is worth it
The thought never crossed my mind
Until today ,I have decided
That's it's time to speak
And you will hear all that I have to say
About that night it happened
What it did to me
And how it made me feel
Aug 16, 2018
Aug 16, 2018 at 11:11 PM UTC