Alone, cold,
Misunderstood.
Fighting a battle that began before our conception.
Cursed. The physical manifestation of ones fathers mistake.
Emotions removed, confiscated. No longer relevant.
Useless.
Sympathy lost when love failed us.
Patience is the only retribution.
The endangered struggling black father.
On the verge of self destruction.
Restricted from the love of his own life force.
With no direction. No support.
Intense emotions personified by a series of precise phrases representing static progress and consistent negligence.
Our efforts are never enough.
Our words mean nothing.
Our concerns, suppressed.
Our worries, neglected.
Our respect, vaporized.
Our life. Devalued.
The endangered species
The struggling black father...
Jan 22, 2021
Jan 22, 2021 at 12:49 AM UTC
We often use depression as A form of expression,
A cry from deep inside when you know you’re not accepted
U just wanna fix your wrongs, change some things you live regretting
But u gotta move forward, remember to forget things
Checking my position, google maps for the heading,
Rest In Peace to my second child, we gone meet in heaven,
From the way I lost my family, I really learned a lesson
You cannot be a leader if they always see you stressing
I’m looking for my family **** I miss their presence,
From picking out a tree, baking cookies wrapping presents
Spending time taking walks, just connecting,
I Spend my hours in the mirror just reflecting...
Sep 14, 2019
Sep 14, 2019 at 10:24 PM UTC
From the outside in. You would bet his life was perfect
Deep deeds low enough to crush a man surface
But the reason isn’t valid and his efforts weren’t worth it
He tried to **** himself on snap and hoped that she’d record it
Had a feeling that his family wouldn’t care.
He tried to tell them all but they probably didn’t hear
He tried to hit the gas with the reaper on his rear
Crashed right into depression it was standing like a deer...
Jun 11, 2019
Jun 11, 2019 at 5:29 AM UTC
The Love I lost is fear I found
Face to face, with devils round
Angels falls while demons rise
Countless truths disguised as lies
My thoughts they sink beneath my soul
Bottomless Pitt or a ******* hole
Sins they feel like trucks on shoulders
My life is ****** no **** bent over
Karma flashed before ur eyes,
You felt her squirting on ur thigh
******* cheat with “random” guys
Ppl **** we don’t know why
Conversations minimized
While revenge is televised
I’m sorry Lord I’m falling but
You know my heart was meant to fly
I look my demons in the face
And told them ***** ****** try,
They told me that they in my head
They let me know don’t even cry
The actions that you thought was sane
Is causing everybody pain
Now ur time suffer right on the track just like a speeding train
Now I got a loaded gun
but my demons didn’t run
They said ***** ***** shoot, to **** us all you just need one”
Trust I was tempted dogg,
To squeeze the trig and end it all
They say they don’t understand
I leave my brains all on the wall
No u see inside my mind
Don’t forget the piece outside
The warnings that I tried to give
Was treated ill and tossed aside
Now you see the joke the was real
I’m bleeding yet I’m fighting still
Now I see that I’m still alive
**** it dog I’m gone survive
Staggered to my broken feet
Look my demons in the eye
Told that ***** ***** “look I
Know u dead but time to die
Light is dead and darkness thrives
Jun 8, 2019
Jun 8, 2019 at 3:26 AM UTC
My life been ****** even though I got my luck up,
Karma on my neck leeching like a bloodsucker,
******* at my chest, ppl ask if imma **** her,
I just go and tell him naw look around and drop a rubber
But the way that I was raised, by some gangstas and some saints,
When I tried to change the channel i was some how in the paint,
Fighting every ******* day,
To keep my demons all astray
pray to God I go above when I confess on Judgment Day
I ask the Lord to gimme hell so it don’t fall all on Renee
That’s my daughter and her mother so u know i got them K
If **** don’t work out God forbid we separate
I hope they let you know that I’m a finger dial away
For all the **** that i done did I already know that imma pay.
I just pray I make it right before the day my casket lay
All the women i done tried and all the bricks that I done weighed
Insecurities and pride paranoia jealous rage,
I ask the Lord to make me better for my family and my sake
And when I go I need a pound of dro and gin all in my wake,
Lemon pepper at my funeral, the macaroni baked,
A couple gallons of some Kream
Cuz u know I don’t eat cake
See the moral of the story is learn to live with faith
So it’ll paint a better picture on the canvas everyday
Learn to love the ones you got cause the Lord will let them stray
Cause you’ll be living with regret while you smoke your life away
Sep 4, 2018
Sep 4, 2018 at 6:36 PM UTC
My words exist behind the screen.
Just letters to you, I lost my purpose
I pray you be blessed with King and no stress
actions misjudged, solemn enough
Upon the sunrise, I pray the light finds its way into my soul...
Goodbye...
Sep 4, 2018
Sep 4, 2018 at 1:27 PM UTC
I’m in Love and regret
It’s a new retrospect
So much sorrow and gloom
As life lessons they bloom
In Love when upset
You forgive and forget
While regret makes no sense
You just cry in contempt
My soul it bleeds sadness
while pain heals the wound
The nightmares of death
Came to play all to soon
The pain that I felt only you understand
A void that is gone was not part of my plan
I have yet to cease weeping
My heart grated to shreds
As the guilt cuts me up
Like Katanas in hand
I look in the mirror
with no one to blame
Not a spark in my pupil
My eyes filled with shame
Yah tells us no lies when you feel what I feel
A Love that’s worth fighting for
A Love that is Real.
Pensai...
Sep 2, 2018
Sep 2, 2018 at 10:25 PM UTC
As time moves things pass
The turmoils of today grows constant
Light shines where dark thrives
I no longer feel relevant
A loud cry often overheard
Mistaken for a violent surge
I’m overheard never Understood
I’ve come face to face with my demons once again.
Stronger than ever.
Gnawing away at my soul. I can feel their teeth on my emotions.
Yet I refuse to fold.
Aug 25, 2018
Aug 25, 2018 at 7:30 PM UTC
The sound is painful
Like nails on a green blackboard
The key of heartbreak...
Aug 12, 2018
Aug 12, 2018 at 8:39 PM UTC
Love me hard, yet touch me soft
Grip me tight, and don’t get off
When mountains rise, and rivers clash
Land will slide, like rain on glass
Diamond thrive, where pressure rise
I see my future, in your eyes.
Love me hard, yet touch me soft
Our bond is mocked and often scoffed,
Public fears , are dreams come true
We both shed tears. As our love grew
Our battles won, are worth the telling
A Timeless tale, a happy ending..
Love me Hard, Yet touch me soft,
Penthouse Dreams, amid a loft
He knows our hearts, we cannot lie
We’re proud of love, but yet so shy
Love me Hard, yet touch me soft,
Love me hard, yet touch me soft.
“Pensai”
Aug 4, 2018
Aug 4, 2018 at 8:28 PM UTC