I know where that goes but I don’t know where to put it.
May 31, 2025
May 31, 2025 at 4:33 PM UTC
You used to be the place
Where I’d unravel all my sins
Now I don’t know where to start
Because I don’t know where you end
May 31, 2025
May 31, 2025 at 4:07 PM UTC
Another and another, stripped flat.
The whispering world behind the scenes longing for what they could say of the broken
The names openly spoken and swept from mouth to mouth
More than gravity unknown
It stopped her heart
He would’ve answered
He plucked the brightest star and drowned it.
May 22, 2025
May 22, 2025 at 9:35 PM UTC
I like to see the cup half full,
Even when it’s full of ****
Apr 24, 2025
Apr 24, 2025 at 10:10 PM UTC
I feel like I’m being ripped apart from the inside
I’ve buried these feelings but they won’t be denied
It started with a burning deep in my lungs
From breaths held waiting
Hiding eyes tear stung
Rationality outran by fear
When it comes to him I can’t see clear
Sleepless nights tossing, turning
In my mind, always yearning
Bring me peace or quick relief
Quiet, give me something that feels true
I am no longer who I was to you
Apr 23, 2025
Apr 23, 2025 at 8:59 AM UTC
for she
<>
"I choose to love you in silence, for in silence I find no rejection.
I choose to love you in loneliness, for in loneliness no one owns you but me.
I choose to adore you from a distance, for distance will shield me from pain.
I chose to kiss you in the wind, for the wind is gentler than my lips.
I choose to hold you in my dreams, for in my dreams you have no end"
Rumi
<>
writ in a time, for when
there is never enough,
and yet,
always, waves of too much,
needy for
filling feeling fulfilling
We must learn,
be self taught to:
"Leave a tender moment alone
You got to leave a tender moment alone
Leave a tender moment alone
Leave a tender moment"
ah the tender time is nonetheless
rightly and wrongly
rightly now,
for I have stumbled,
overheated, sweaty, from the night bed,
at 4.30am into another darkened toom,
and I have smacked~stumbled into
Rumi
and his
into our paths continuously intersecting,
in the same but
in different cities, continents,
and yet,
diffident, differing,
we silently choose
never to close those lady~last few miles
and tie the knot of
eyes, skin, lips
the instruments
that transmit thousands of
neuronal explosions that
seal the deal
so we write in poetry,
in silence broken by the gentility
of fingertips soundlessly
and yet,
boundlessly rocking,
explosively soundings of
tap tap tapping
my music mocks me,
it is definitively god interfering,
advising, conspiring,
wiring into my brain
better lyrics,
idealized notions,
exactly appropriate
and appreciated
with the lyrics urging me on,
and that we must be
self taught to:
"Leave a tender moment alone
You got to leave a tender moment alone
Leave a tender moment alone
Leave a tender moment"
but my heart trembly refuses,
insightful informing
that now,
now! is
the moment to exchange
vows of words,
though un spoke,
they require
written completion
through
& though
apart, alone,
to finally out loud confess
what has always been known, only to each other,
to be
so real
and yet,
we will never exchange
these sentiments
in out loud words
but though this be lacking,
it will never
diminish
their ultimate
intimate
truthfulness
and I ask,
is this a poem?
surely
it is that, and
so much more,
an essay, a letter on
invisible NML stationary,
a heart carving in
an oaken barrelling of
ancient vintagery
and that interloper,
Him again,
eavesdropping
on this private communication,
insists that I draw deep
from her favorite
singer~songwriter,
words that say it better,
that for real seal the deal,
in the saddened perfection
of total, enwrapped,
silence:
"Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence"
and
it is time
to finish this task,
it is exactly one hour,
no time at all,
to complete a love poem that
is/was complete,
even before its
composition
and yet,
is never to be be familiar with
the finality of
completion
<>
postscript:
I taste your private shed tears,
hear the howling sigh,
but most of all,
'tis the explosion of
a deep smiling creasing
your lips,
spreading in all directions
saying and stating:
at last, at last!
a lasting, a confessional to you god,
though,
a through and through
silent
jubilation
nml
April 8, 2025
530am
New York City
Apr 20, 2025
Apr 20, 2025 at 6:44 AM UTC
Have you ever had a dream so real it broke your reality?
I mean, it absolutely shatters the way you look at a person. Of course, it wasn't real. But how easily it could be. Your brain catches all of your fears and weaves them into a web of insecurity that plays every time you close your eyes.
If I could sleep forever, would I know that I'm dreaming? Would it end the deep, or would I wake up screaming?
All I see are his eyes plunging through the dark, falling further away from me.
His fingers curled round my face in a traitorous touch. His lips on my lips as he turns into dust. He is nothing but sand on the cliff side scattered in the breeze. And I am nothing but weakness trembling on my knees.
Why did I push him?
Feb 8, 2025
Feb 8, 2025 at 3:02 PM UTC
He's like a fever dream I woke from and can barely remember
On the edge of my memory
The tiniest sliver
It's been a few months
He got lost in the blur
All I can recall are his horrendous last words
'Hey, do me a favor. If you ever feel like reaching out, don't. I'll make you hang yourself on your feelings and have you look stupid.'
That broke something so deep seeded in me
Ripped out all the good I ever thought I seen
Three and a half years deleted from my brain
Everything fading until you've been completely erased.
Jul 6, 2024
Jul 6, 2024 at 12:23 PM UTC