Sixteen years i have waited
and Sixteen more i shall wait
Oct 9, 2016
Oct 9, 2016 at 1:19 PM UTC
It is heartbreaking, my gut twists with pain
I'm nobody without somebody
May 19, 2016
May 19, 2016 at 7:49 PM UTC
I hide away all my feelings
To see who would care
I won't show my discomfort
Or the joy that i should share
Because at the end of the day
No one will be there
I'm all alone again
Real friends, i know not where
May 17, 2016
May 17, 2016 at 10:30 PM UTC
One second your there
Then you're gone
Thats why i prefer
To be alone
May 17, 2016
May 17, 2016 at 10:28 PM UTC
Today I feel alone
But I know that
I am alone everyday
But on good days
I seem to forget
May 17, 2016
May 17, 2016 at 10:27 PM UTC
It happened while listening to a song
An old song i used to hear when
She was around
It happened while somewhere far
Away
The purple blossoms began to die and fall from the tree
And somewhere further she lied next
To another man
Feeling that same howling loneliness
She felt with me
That old song put me right back into
That dim room
Lying next to her
Feeling full
Full of love fear joy and
That underlying loneliness
I am always running from
I listened to the song and began to
Tear up
I haven't cried in two years
I haven't cried because I haven't
Loved since then
I tried to shake it off and
Focus on the boxing match I was
Watching
But that ********* song kept
******* me back into that dim room
We used to lay around lifeless,jobless,
Starving
Eating a box of Bisquick and each other's souls all day and night
I thought I was missing her
But no, it wasn't that
It was never really love
We were just two wounded spiders
Trying to devour one another
I missed feeling full.
I missed the days without this
Immense burning
I missed the days without death die
Destroy
I missed living *********
The song ended
The tears never fell
But I came pretty ****** close
Then I felt that ugly humongous
Mountain
Crawl off my chest
I felt the drowning rats climb out of my gut
I walked outside
And watched the purple blossoms
Die from the tree
And the air tasted sweet
And my body felt light
The war is over. The war is over.
My god. I hope my war is over.
May 14, 2016
May 14, 2016 at 12:50 AM UTC
I want to smile and laugh
I close my eyes and sleep
I hear you laugh
Nothing's ever made me so sad than when I see you smile
Your happiness cuts through my skin
Sinking in like black ink
Your simple life
Is everything I want
The need to have what you have
Is so strong
I would **** for it
That black ink is what keeps me going
You are what keeps me going.
May 14, 2016
May 14, 2016 at 12:43 AM UTC
I can hear your voice
And in my head you are so far away
You stare steadily at me
But not in hate
I know you are just waiting
For me to finally say
That I am ready
to wholeheartedly accept your stay
I wish to say yes
Yet I know I won't today
The truth is that I do want you
But today is not the day
The loving look in your eyes
Tell me you will wait
May 3, 2016
May 3, 2016 at 9:20 PM UTC
Well ****
I wrote something.
Something long and great about who inspires me
The people who have encouraged me through this life time
And I asked. . . . at the end of what I wrote
Who inspires you?
Now I'm not much of a religious person,
but I know a sign when I see one.
I went to add the (Poem)
And somehow pressed something that sent me back to my homepage
Imagine that.
I was so ****** because It was so long and I hadn't written it down
So I didn't bother trying to write it again because obviously HP didn't want me to
I'm laughing just thinking about that.
Life finds little ways to ***** you over
Or to let know when you're being stupid.
Maybe both.
Whether or not you decide to take notice is your choice
But anyways
I just wanted you to know it was a great poem
Well I thought so(not)
Maybe send a little prayer to heaven about it later.
(Im just kidding)
Seriously,
Those who can find happiness In the darkest times
People who can fall to hell and then climb back, are inspiring to me.
They're stronger then most and an inspiration to many.
What about you?
Who do you find inspiring?
Nov 29, 2015
Nov 29, 2015 at 12:03 PM UTC
you have to be able to love her while she's still, stagnant -
to be able to love her once she starts moving
Aug 30, 2015
Aug 30, 2015 at 11:07 AM UTC