I've fallen into an empty void.
I have the will to pull myself out,
But I'm not sure I want to.
I don't feel overwhelmed,
I don't get hurt,
And I'm done crying.
Apr 1, 2019
Apr 1, 2019 at 2:36 PM UTC
i am
a confusing person.
i may
love things
that i hate;
i may
hate things
that i love.
sometimes
i adore the sun setting
and i close my eyes
as the sun drapes itself
with dust and memories.
then
i despise the way
the sun rises
with false anticipation
for children chasing them,
desiring to touch
even a glint of gold
and sunlight.
but i try not to love
the way your crooked smile
makes everything look
endearing.
because
i am afraid
that i will soon learn
to hate it.
Dec 28, 2017
Dec 28, 2017 at 9:00 AM UTC
I wish it would
well rain harder
I wish that
the sky water would be salty
like my tears.
this way both could slide down my face unidentifiable
I wish the thunder was louder
just to help save me from my thoughts
I love how
well simply how
I'm walking to the beat,
crunching gravel to meet the sound
of my favorite song
even though it's no longer playing
I love that
the rain is blurring my vision
eventhough I couldn't see anyway
I love that with every step
I'm taking a shower
the rain provides me with good cleansing
I'm slowly scrubbing away every
remark, laugh, judge, scar and stain
and as my jeans, blouse, and shoes get wet,
I'm washing away some of this too
hidden deep within the seams
and yet some people wonder
why
why does she like the rain
well
It's not just rain
it's a friend
that I can talk to and actually leave with
a cleansed soul.
May 13, 2017
May 13, 2017 at 8:51 AM UTC
Can you feel the ache in my chest?
Can you touch the cracks in my heart?
Can you tell where my soul begins,
And where it's been torn all apart?
I'm made of sharp edges and pieces fit with super glue
Can you feel it?
I'm a heartless enigma and a soulless slice of truth
Can you feel it?
Enemies make the best friends and now I hate you
Can you feel it?
Lies are like a bullet to my heart, filling me with holes
A feeling of emptiness overwhelms me, a space too bold
Trying to hold on tight to a tangle too tied to unfold
Lost in a web of pain too damaged to be controlled
I'm made of broken glass, chipped and shattered
Can you feel it?
I'm an empty shell of something that once mattered
Can you feel it?
Pieces are falling, a love now bruised and battered
Can you feel it?
The harmony of injustice is ringing in my ears
A lullaby of sweet nothings and my childhood fears
A common trend unfolds, a chorus of chants and tears
A pain ripples through my body and the monster finally appears
Can you feel it?
Apr 15, 2017
Apr 15, 2017 at 1:47 PM UTC
I come from a place
Where reality's a dream
We sleepwalk awake
Silent are the screams
Uncertainty is certain
Lies are absolute
Destruction just creates
The vital and minute
Consciously unaware
Of our intended mistakes
Reminded to forget
That giving only takes
I come from a place
Where eyes never see
Through the mists of illusion
Surrounding you and me
Jan 11, 2017
Jan 11, 2017 at 9:37 AM UTC
When I look back at the things I had
The things that now are gone
I was planting seeds of division
But the trees grew tall and strong
I used to see for miles around
But now the forest grows
Beneath the shade of branches
Are secrets no one knows
At first it was a place to hide
An oasis on barren lands
But holding on to a past that's gone
Was just leaving time on my hands
For years I must have wandered
Abandoning all that was good
I thought I knew my way out
But now I'm lost in the woods
Jan 11, 2017
Jan 11, 2017 at 9:37 AM UTC
Turbulence in my mind
Peace I cannot find
Thoughts I cannot park
Silence screams in the dark
Demented shadow rejoices
Deafening loud noises
Exhausting persistent voices
Debating impossible choices
Don't need anyone to blame
Just Need to numb my brain
Does anyone share this pain?
Does anyone feel the same?
Nov 22, 2016
Nov 22, 2016 at 3:26 PM UTC
this is not poetry
but my god, i wish it was
poetry is easy
it's crisp, it's clean
it makes me feel better after i write it
it fits into this box
i shut it and set it on a shelf
my feelings go away
and i just don't think about it.
this definitely isn't poetry
it isn't romanticized
or overly depressing
or absolutely elated
i get it that not everyone's poetry is any of those
but mine is.
and you,
are definitely not poetry.
you are not easy.
you don't make sense
i can't just not think about you
you make me feel confused
and livid and loving and terrified.
sometimes, you make me feel nothing at all
and sometimes, i feel everything at once.
i can't write you down
and box you up
and put you away.
you're not poetry
but my god, i wish you were
Nov 15, 2016
Nov 15, 2016 at 1:07 PM UTC
I said I'd wait a thousand years
A thousand years I've waited
The fragile seeds of hope I've hewn
Have blossomed forth-
And faded.
The span of time, the falling sand
That journeys down the glass
Has shivered down to rest against
The last wish of the past
Words I've writ of you by night
Have lightened now by day
Would that I could read them now
I'd not hear what they say.
Truthfully, the beauty of a newly conjured flame
Undeniably must end
When met with winter rain.
Oct 14, 2016
Oct 14, 2016 at 3:36 PM UTC