I long for the shore yet she always pushes me away
Constantly being moved by the moon
Sometimes I hold great saudade
But then I listen for the selcouth music of the mermaids
and radiate from the beauty of life gliding and dancing through my tides
I gaze up at the night and am mesmerized by the stars
Knowing this world is a miracle
and I hold so much magic and beauty
I crave for the touch of God's creations never getting enough
Knowing my purpose, I am recherche
Holding dreams and wishes, hopes and fears
Secrets I hold in my deepest trenches
I know I am loved for even the sun desires my presence
I am sempiternal
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 2:45 PM UTC
From the saltwater kissing my skin as i sit with a bud light in hand
to the late night windows down drives blasting florida-georgia line
remnants of banana boat sun tan oil still tickling my nose
The crickets humming to the constellations on them backroads
Free as an eagle frolicing the night away
Wonderful miracles circle the air reminding us of earlier that day
The waves hugging the shore always returning without hesitation
feeling like a mermaid gliding through the tides of tomorrow
sand hiding between my toes and the salty air playing with my long hair
trucks line the beach as the guys throw the ball
Dancing to Luke Bryan while our responsibilities remain on the dunes
Watermelon exciting my mouth in the utmost wonderful way
Oh the rope by the river as we all swing into the water letting it all fly away
Driving the big bear was always a challenge riding through the puddles
Sun brushing my skin in the most elysian way
Forever in this moment of grace and serenity
A serendipity truly, Fate knocked i answered
Sempiternal memories remain
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 2:42 PM UTC
A magical place where the heart beats on strength
The Boardwalk guides souls together
My roots blossomed on those 127 miles of Garden State shores
Days spent at Seaside Heights, dancing to Bruce Springsteen
The Boardwalk guides souls together
Down on the shore I found myself
Days spent at Seaside Heights, dancing to Bruce Springsteen
Nights gathering at the 24/7 Diner
Down on the shore I found myself
A land where anything is possible
Nights gathering at the 24/7 Diner
Recollecting to cheese fries and plain pie
A land where anything is possible
Where we don’t pump our gas, we pump our fists
Recollecting to cheese fries and plain pie\
An ez pass saves 20 minutes on the turnpike
Where we don’t pump our gas, we pump our fists
A Wawa on every corner and no left turns
An ez pass saves 20 minutes on the turnpike
65 miles per hour means 80
A Wawa on every corner and no left turns
The East Coast, My home sweet home
65 miles per hour means 80
Us Jersey girls are fast paced, beautiful chaos
The East Coast, My home sweet home
A magical place where the heart beats on strength
Us Jersey girls are fast paced beautiful chaos
My roots blossomed on those 127 miles of Garden State shores
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 2:35 PM UTC
I didn't want us to be an ephemera,
I wanted us to be sempiternal.
Sipping on the rose tinted wine of eternity
While our hearts danced to the waltz.
Though our love was magic,
I always found myself in sciamachy,
doubting and fighting my feelings.
We used to sit on the front porch
watching the sun rest on the horizon
of tomorrow. We’d pass time
laughing and spilling our dreams
into the intertwining lust forming.
The world hushed to the sweet
anchor of togetherness
we were imprinting like fossil fuels,
wanting to freeze time like a photo booth,
each night was spontaneous captions
of greatness we fancied
until we slumbered off at the matutine hour.
I miss that now.
The benthic intensity now tucked away
in the shoebox collecting dust,
holding dandelion seeds of yesterday's love.
Looking back, we were us,
but now I am I. No longer in dozakh,
we are left strolling to life’s tour guide
of imagination and mystery.
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:18 AM UTC
What if the earth sat in the palm of my hand?
Like a baseball on opening day
Flashing pictures on a white screen
Like a kaleidoscope I played with when I was six
Octagons of different lives intertwining as I spin the slide
Watching souls collide like dominos
Each time a greater butterfly effect awakens
Seas becoming hurricanes
And Countries becoming combat zones
Projections of the young girl camouflaged in sarcasm
And caked on black eyeliner
To the “perfect wife” caressing the neighbor
In her husband’s study
To the college girl following the stars barefoot
After a dazed night that fractured her soul
Spinning to find a fragment of perfection
like the teacups at Disney world
Dissecting each cup of life
Becoming vertiginous with disappointment
Looking down at the world clenched in my hand
Tears streams down my cheek
Causing tsunamis in my palms
Oh how wonderful I thought it would be
If the world sat in the palm of my hand
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:15 AM UTC
Behind the disguise of a smile
Fear quivers in the shadows
Adrift from society
Numbness takes over- allowing all to shut down
No-one is life-boated from the cloak covering her
The disguise hiding the drowning girl she is
Hurricanes of confusion prevent from air
Weights tying down, sinking, unable to breathe
All pouring in until there is no more her
Rip Currents of emotions dragging her under
Poseidon's wrath begins to take over inside
The sirens poisonous song leads her to false hope
Standing in the shadows of hypocrisy and Judgement
Her body blindly shading to numb blue
Yet her mask distracts
from her gasps for air
Suffocating on overwhelming anger, sadness, joy,
Feeling with every inch of her bones
Constantly at war, one second swimming
Suddenly the tsunamis of her lows ****** her under
Then Slowly the pace begins to tame
Slowing, slowing, until inevitably stopping before time
Helplessness fills her lungs
Not even CPR can save her now
Finally the storms stand at ease
Free at last as the last breath is exhaled
Leaving behind the omission to mourn
Heavens wings will soon explain
The Treaty of Peace is signed
ropes of emotion now unraveled
None will understand
at last the numbness fades
The mask falls off
Left floating on the tides of tomorrow
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:14 AM UTC
You were my entire book.
Binded in sweet sun-kissed leather,
every page, all 913 days, made my heart skip.
Even if I never even left a chapter
in your table of contents in life.
My Chapter One-
Mini golf and Rocky Road Ice cream on the tip of your nose.
Walking in the sand along the immensity of the world.
Wine and chemistry kept us warm and fuzzy
like the socks hospitals give the ill.
The moon guided us to turn the page.
Chapter Three-
Lust bonded our heards
by the quilt of the heavens
blanketing the dirt road lit up by the constellations.
Each fabric square a new dream for the future,
Libraries and Burgundy kitchens.
You kissed my third eye,
paralyzing me to the rhythm of your soul.
Chapter Five-
“I love you”
You whispered in my ear
to the background of Gary Allan's “Your Man”.
Swaying with the crowd,
Budweiser flowing through our veins,
I let the world shut down.
Fast forward: Chapter Twelve-
“Marry me?”
You knelt down and asked
Holding the little black box as if you held the Universe in your palm.
“You’re my blessing”,
floated in thick smog in my head.
I loved you with all 206 bones in my body.
Every muscle tingled towards “Yes”
but nothing came out.
Eighteen is too young to say forever.
Chapter Fifteen-
Broke me, stomped on my heart, stabbed me to nothing.
“It didn’t mean anything”, “I’m sorry”, “Forgive me”,
vomited from your lying lips.
Eighteen years of collaboration.
Eighteen years of sharing.
Eighteen years of providing.
A lifetime bond formed in a tiny vessel.
Yet forgiveness masked my crumbling heart.
Chapter Seventeen-
Broken in between the pages of sorrow,
navigating on the false love squeezing me dry.
You became obsessive, overprotective, overly guilty.
Blue and red lights lite up that night like something from a sad movie.
Never meant to contain this content, wish it could be unprinted.
Jail- Jobless- Homeless, Sticking around gave me paper cuts.
But the wounds were never enough to shut the book.
Chapter Nineteen-
Addiction.
Abuse.
Infidelity.
Each page screamed “Help!”
But the words hide between the lines of your lies.
Chapter Thirty-
Became the final chapter of us,
I had to say “The end”
Goodbye was hard but so was continuing this destructive nightmare.
The final pages are not regret
but understanding and forgiveness.
Acceptance in the ending,
preparation for a new book,
one without you painting the pages.
The final chapter closed the door of forever for us,
But always a memory of Once Upon A Time.
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:10 AM UTC
We were sailing on an odyssey of serendipity;
[a varary]
as life inhaled blossoming dreams;
Our souls
sipped on caffeinated guarantees of forever.
Dancing
to the susurrant aroma of our anoesis love;
My demons
silenced as your lightning strikes my spirit.
Except-
We were dry ice
[burning]
mistaking the coldhearted as fire,
passion,
held together by slumbered intertwining secrets.
Breathing,
to the yonderly rhythm of your existence:
Your demons
danced in my head to the drums of insecurities.
And yet-
We were a shipwreck of magnetic hearts
[catastrophic]
You said I lingered on the needle of your compass navigating your soul;
Cardiac Glycoside-
poisoned by the gravitational pull of our hurricane hearts.
Desire
connects our souls becoming an electric sun- an eclipse of beautiful destruction, ignites;
Our demons
dressed in lust, now sing a sweet mellifluous lullaby.
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:08 AM UTC