You don't understand what you've done
You think this is funny
till it really happens hunny
You are calling me all these names
thinking its a joke, till you choke
Killing yourself isn't something to be proud of
so don't be joking about it to someone who is unavowed
It's to the point where I'm barely holding together
wanting to pull the trigger since all I'm in is cold weather
Your 14, skinny, perfect, and smart,
as you're over here calling me words,
that shouldn't be heard.
She thinks its all fun and games
till I actually aim,
lives are changing so you won't be able to claim
... claim my life you're trying to tame.
Aug 12, 2018
Aug 12, 2018 at 2:02 PM UTC
I got you back
not sure if how long I'll have you back
but for now, I have you
For the last two months, you've had me on that blocked list
It's broken me
I use to love you
I use to say it all the time to you,
but now when you say it to me I don't know what to think
because yes I love you
but I can't get hurt again
You make me crazy,
I am so crazy about you its not funny.
I can't get you off my mind,
you've been there for me for the last two years.
I'm pretty sure that over the two years
I have learned so much about you,
I know more than your own sister does
you have bipolar,
you have girlfriend issues,
you have fighting issues,
so many issues that I know about that I'm not scared of.
I'm not scared of you
I am in love with you and nothing
absolutely nothing will change the love I have for you
I have written you so many paragraphs
I have told you several times I hate you,
You have called me several names and still,
nothing will change the amount of love I have for you.
You've stolen me from several guys,
telling them lies about me
because you need me
you love me
and you deny it every time
but honestly, that's okay
because I know deep down you are in love with me,
and I am in love with you,
and I won't deny it
Isaiah Micheal,
I am in love with you,
and you don't love me at all.
It's March 26, 2018, and I am just publishing this,
two days ago you blocked me,
two days ago I lost you again,
two days ago it all went downhill again.
Mar 26, 2018
Mar 26, 2018 at 11:35 AM UTC
On this day back in January
I was scrolling through Instagram,
and I found this girl,
this very pretty girl.
I started following her
and then I added her on snapchat
She and I then started talking, hitting it off,
that's when we became Internet Best Friends.
This specific girl tells me a lot
I talk to her a lot,
we talk almost every single day for the last 8 weeks
since January 19th to be exact.
This girl lives 1,515 miles away,
22 hours and 28 minutes.
This specific girl I'm talking about is my best friend,
My Internet Best Friend to be exact.
June 30, 2019
I'm going to leave my house,
drive three days,
the 1,515 miles,
and many states
just to meet my Internet Best Friend.
Mar 22, 2018
Mar 22, 2018 at 11:53 AM UTC
Months ago, I felt crazy about you.
but you suddenly left me.
You called me names,
said you never cared,
said you never wanted anything to do with me,
but deep down I knew you did.
We've stopped talking,
completely.
I'm not sure why,
but it's crushed me.
I was crazy about you,
but it all went downhill,
fast, and scary.
There have been several months,
where I haven't spoken a word to you.
As the months go on
I haven't been thinking about you like I use to,
but I still do because I can't get you out of my head.
I use to call you
Babe, Baby, Handsome, Cutie, Mine, and B.
You use to call me
Cutie, Babe, Baby, Beautiful, Gorgeous, Cutie, BB, and Babygirl.
We use to say "I love you"
but everything has gone downhill
I can't love you anymore,
I can't text you,
I can't call you,
I can't talk to you.
I thought everything would change for the good,
but it hasn't.
Everything changed for the worse.
I lost you completely
Mar 9, 2018
Mar 9, 2018 at 12:13 PM UTC
Some nights I go down memory lane
Where I don't like to be,
I go there because flashbacks come back,
To the point where I'm in tears
I don't like to cry,
But I can't help it.
When I do end up crying,
It's too late.
On a cold January day,
I was abused
Bad
In school,
In the bathroom,
In the handicap stall,
I was left there to cry,
When I told the police,
It was too late,
Way too late.
They couldn't do anything because it was way too late.
Since then,
The last 2 years,
I've been bullied,
Harassed,
Physically and online
Not to the point where I wanted to do self-harm
But I've thought about it,
Several times.
Feb 27, 2018
Feb 27, 2018 at 6:31 PM UTC
I've been broken
I've been hurt
I feel like I won't repair
But I know I will
But I doubt it will be anytime soon
But if it is
It'll be a miracle
Because I am a mess
I am depressed
and shaking
and clearly not myself
I don't know when I'll be myself either
I have been broken
For a long time
Don't think I'll heal quickly
Because I don't think I will.
Feb 24, 2018
Feb 24, 2018 at 8:30 PM UTC