1. I made him leave because sleeping next to someone that smells differently than you would be a nightmare in itself.
2. I'm more lonely every second you ignore me than I was every year I spent alone
3. I don't know which is worse, the death I've felt since you left or the death I wish I had before you had the chance to leave.
4. How am I supposed to move forward with my life when my future was supposed to be with you?
5. An hour shouldn't feel like a galaxy away.
6. I watched it eat away every beautiful piece of you.
7. You were a volcano and after your irruption I don't know where to begin rebuilding my city.
Mar 26, 2015
Mar 26, 2015 at 3:30 AM UTC
have you ever believed
in something so blindly
so genuinely
that the moment you realize
it isn't true, something inside you
changes forever?
i wanna tell you a story, see
seldom do i ever
go swimming in drinks
deep enough to drown in
but when i do
i speak in tongues
about things that none
of my memories
are allowed to talk about
like that christmas
at the isthmus
where my girlfriend
plucked a conch shell
whiter than gods teeth
out of the sand
held it to her ear
and stopped time
that day she was a shade of blue
the could've made the ocean sick
see, she loved to play jokes
when she held
the sea shell to her ear
she gasped, called my name
and said "i want you to hear this"
i said "yeah, right, everybody knows it's just the same old sea"
she replied "no. not this one. this one is special. listen. theres music in this one"
she handed me the shell
like a promise she couldn't keep
and i held it to my ear
with all the potential
of seeing shore
after being stranded
at sea for years
only to hear
a tired dirge of silence
spill from its emptiness
i guess she didn't know
how desperately
i wanted to hear it too
because ever since
something inside me snapped
now sand pours out
of every post card i open
i hear seagulls
in telephone static
sometimes i have dreams
where i bury my hands
in every beach
i've ever been on
and exhume this graveyard of noise
every time i try to sleep
i spit up fishhooks
and i guess i'm obsessed
but maybe
if i hold my ear
to enough vacant things
then i could have back
the time stolen from me
since it happened
maybe they would get it
if they knew what i wanted
when i blow out birthday candles
maybe they'll find me
face down in a wishing well
i watch eternal sunshine
of the spotless mind every day
pretending i can forget too
because this sea sickness
has followed me for years
because yesterday
i walked into a music shop
and all the pianos broke
but the only thing
i can think to say is
*do you know how bad
a memory has to be
that you fantasize
about forgetting it?*
Feb 3, 2015
Feb 3, 2015 at 1:40 PM UTC
You introduced me to parts of myself that depression buried long before I had the chance to meet them.
Feb 3, 2015
Feb 3, 2015 at 1:39 PM UTC
If he calls you pretty
Cut him off
You are far too exquisite for degrading words such as those
If he says he is different
Do not return his call
Those words light a flame of false hope that burns down every wall you've built up
If he does not try to understand
Slam the door in his face
You have no need for a coward
Jan 28, 2015
Jan 28, 2015 at 1:25 AM UTC
You asked me why I traced the lines on your face,
I couldn't bear to tell you that I wanted your skin to burn my fingertips until we met again.
I found myself staring while you were sleeping, memorizing your every feature.
I don’t want to forget even the tiniest freckle.
I could paint every square inch of your room with utmost detail.
I memorized it while you were dreaming of all the places you'd rather be, and I was awake from the horrors of the nightmare that is your departure.
Maybe if I don't forget the view from my side of the bed, I'll be able to close my eyes and still imagine things haven't changed.
Dec 22, 2014
Dec 22, 2014 at 12:43 AM UTC