I need an answer.
I need to hear your voice.
I need to feel the warmth of your hug
and the bliss of your lips.
I need to know,
does she give you what you need?
Does she make you feel more than I ever could?
Does she hold you while you cry?
Is she everything you couldn’t find in my eyes?
I want an answer,
knowing the need is not necessary;
knowing the response will break me
more than I broke your self esteem.
Time passes,
two years to be exact.
But I need to know,
Does she sleep with my blanket,
the one I gave you?
Does she hold your hand as you drive?
Does she run her hands through your hair,
that you used to melt over?
Does she sit for hours with your mom,
laughing through the childhood memories she shares?
Is she everything you couldn’t find in my eyes?
I need an answer.
I want an answer.
A list of questions,
that could continue for pages,
but all I truly want to know;
Does she love you like I loved you?
Jun 20, 2019
Jun 20, 2019 at 10:20 AM UTC
Forced visitations
weren't your determination.
Heartache
and mistakes.
Tore us down
like we weren't even your own.
You shut us down,
made us feel all alone.
The day you raised your hand,
I will never understand.
You lost all trust,
leaving us in disgust.
You never cared from the beginning,
how silly of me to thank you,
but as I grew
I pushed through.
I wouldn't want to be the person
I knew of you.
You taught me one thing
and that one thing is
not who to be
and who not to love.
May 23, 2019
May 23, 2019 at 12:28 PM UTC
I fell for your smile
I fell for your eyes
and your laugh,
oh how it lights up the night
The butterflies that flutter
every time I see your face
But I will never understand
what keeps holding me back
May 23, 2019
May 23, 2019 at 12:23 PM UTC
craving the taste of your lips,
the warmth of your chest pressed against mine,
the heat radiating off of our bodies;
craving you.
May 23, 2019
May 23, 2019 at 12:19 PM UTC
You should never have to apologize for being in love
Apr 17, 2019
Apr 17, 2019 at 12:22 AM UTC
As I laid there once more with your arms
wrapped around my waist, head wresting in my chest,
I whispered,
"something keeps leading me back to you, if only I knew."
You lifted your head, smiled and asked what I said.
I never repeated what I said but
you still grasped a little tighter and said,
"it's always been you, there's something about you."
At that very moment; same thought we had in mind,
I realized its not a "something," but a "someone"
and that someone is happily you--
Until an hour later after you held me,
you held another and that
'happily,' turned quickly to 'sadly.'
--Left to question why; question how,
but simply replied,
"I'm used to it, too many to count."
Apr 17, 2019
Apr 17, 2019 at 12:15 AM UTC
Letting go of you took two years;
two long dreadful years.
Downed a few beers,
holding back all tears.
Here I am,
happier than I’ve ever been,
laughing at the thought of you
and all your lies.
Moving on from the broken and bruised;
bettering health and well being.
Sitting back breaking out in laughter
as you destroy the next me.
I would warn her
I do want to
but the fact she sat back with you
and betrayed me
you can destroy her too.
Mar 15, 2019
Mar 15, 2019 at 10:46 PM UTC
I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.
Now read from bottom to top.
Feb 8, 2019
Feb 8, 2019 at 2:18 AM UTC
If I could turn back time
I would hit Backspace all day,
Id put on Caps Lock
and SHOUT what I say.
I'd use the whole Alphabet
To tell you hello,
Press seven Numbers
Til you picked up the phone.
I'd Tab through the comments
I didn't want to hear,
And use the Arrow Keys
To drag your body near.
I would Delete the harsh words
I didn't mean to speak,
And Insert the "I love yous"
I before couldn't leak.
I would use Ctrl to
Keep reigns over my heart,
And I would Escape lies
That tore us apart.
I'd Print out your photo
And kiss it goodnight,
Use the Calculator
To check that we were right.
I'd Paint you a picture
of us, you and me,
Then I'd hit Enter
Just so you would see.
Those are the things
I would do in my strife,
If only Backspace
worked in real life.
Feb 8, 2019
Feb 8, 2019 at 2:13 AM UTC
My name is Erin
and i was *****
at the age of 7
it has taken me
14 years of my life
for those 13 words to escape
my hollow mouth
the only questions i come to now
is why
why lock me in that room
why take everything from me
my innocence
my purity
my childhood
in that room
where my family trusted you
where i trusted you
the night terrors i have to this day
still haunt my mind
like a never ending
drive in movie that plays
over
and
over
only the moon in the night sky
isnt made to be found here
there is no light in these terrors
i cant sleep this time of year
because every time i do
its you
in that room
locking the door
shutting the windows
********** me
yelling at me
every single night
i close my eyes
it has taken me 14 years
to accept the fact that i was taken by you
i have been numb ever since
left in the dust
rotting away at the core
thinking i was nothing
thinking i deserved nothing
because you took everything
but not anymore
i will recover from this
i am strong enough
i believe in myself
i believe in my own happiness
and i promsie
that when i have children one day
i will never ever let them rot at the core
i will find happiness
the darkness will not take over this time
Jan 30, 2019
Jan 30, 2019 at 11:05 PM UTC