I open my eyes in a daze,
I see the world in a haze.
I think, How much I dont want to get out of bed,
But I also know, I need to escape my head.
Im spiraling further down this black hole,
My mind is racing,
My chest heavy,
My heart aches.
I see blue, tears forming as they please.
I feel red, fists clench tight as can be.
I wish for black, Make all of this pain dissipate.
Fight.
Hide.
Dont cry.
Smile.
Daily things I need to say to myself.
Maybe today will be the best day of your life.
Tomorrow is a new day when that day fails to bring me joy.
Separation from reality sinks in.
Disassociation begins its nasty progress.
Mania takes over.
Memories slip, as I forget minutes,
lead by hours,
days,
sometimes even weeks.
I need to escape my head.
Before I can leave this bed.
Sep 4, 2020
Sep 4, 2020 at 11:32 AM UTC
There was a girl
So full of doom
So hurt by life
Tears ****** dry
Heart so shattered
Body so tired
Mind so fried.
She woke up by morning wondering why
She fell asleep every evening hoping for the last
Pain
Sorrow
Hatred
Sadness
Defeated by life
But life knew why
She walks into a room and sees a light.
The kind that lit her whole world
The darkness faded
The smiles grew
The laughs weren’t forced
The light grew brighter
As she grew closer
She knew at first sight
This was her why.
This light was why she woke up
Why she suffered
Why she cried
And why she hurt.
So when why shined
She could live
And smile
Her why became thank you in the morning
Her hopes became blessings by night
She found her why
her light
Her reason.
Aug 22, 2020
Aug 22, 2020 at 12:47 AM UTC
Depression isn’t always crying
Depression isn’t always suicidal tendencies
Depression isn’t always sad music
Depression isn’t always black clothes
Depression isn’t always sleeping
Depression isn’t always over eating
Depression is sometimes built up laundry
Depression is sometimes fake smiles
Depression is sometimes forced laughter
Depression is sometimes ***** dishes
Depression is sometimes that little extra make
Depression is sometimes the little black dress
Depression is sometimes an overflowing trash can
Depression is sometimes in places you’d never guess it to be.
Aug 22, 2020
Aug 22, 2020 at 12:32 AM UTC
The ugliest moments are your strongest beauty.
The most beautiful moment can tell a thousand words.
The ugliest moments can bring pain and sorrow.
That pain and sorrow cant be covered up with lies
but only through telling your story.
A picture is worth a thousand words?
Well look into my eyes and see a whole novel of worth.
Aug 2, 2020
Aug 2, 2020 at 12:48 PM UTC
Never let society know how anixious you truly are, what a wreck your soul is or what you’re truly thinking, they’ll only tear you down more. Just stand up and act as if you’re ok and pray that you actually will be. 🙏🏼
Aug 2, 2020
Aug 2, 2020 at 12:44 PM UTC
Love is dead
Love so black
Love is hateful
Love so full of hurt
Love is pain
Love so full of regrets
Love is full of tears
Aug 2, 2020
Aug 2, 2020 at 12:17 PM UTC
And
Forever I want to spend wrapped in each other's arms
and
forever I want to spend kissing each other's lips
And
forever I wish to spend in each other's hearts.
Aug 2, 2020
Aug 2, 2020 at 12:16 PM UTC
As you sleep peacefully next to me
I silently hold in the tears
I lightly shake my foot
And my heart painfully breaks.
To be so lonely
When only inches away
You lay.
As our souls die
In the bed we lie
Our hearts break
And no longer we can take.
Our paths separate
Our love fades
Though it didn’t last long
The pain will linger for decades
You are my first true
I thought you were the one
But now I must let you fly
Like the Dove
You are my love.
Until we meet once more.
Feb 22, 2020
Feb 22, 2020 at 12:25 PM UTC
I never had no one that I could count on
I’d been let down so many times
I was tired of hurting
so tired of searching till
you walked into my life
it was a feeling I’d never known
for the first time I’d never felt alone. 💋❤️
Feb 22, 2020
Feb 22, 2020 at 12:23 PM UTC