put your pride down love it’s okay,
watch all your dreams and goals float away ,
does it get easier to say,
that your better alone anyway.
I seem to be losing a grip on it,
there’s nothing to do on your behalf of this,
we just grew apart , have to deal with it,
have the memories of broken bliss .
imagine losing yourself,
wishing you were somebody else,
*** they don’t want you to tell,
what you mean in this world, but hell.
stay true to you,
*** that’s what your meant to do,
if they question you,
say **** them too.
Oct 4, 2019
Oct 4, 2019 at 3:43 PM UTC
I’ve been knocking for like 20 minutes
I’m getting skittish I can’t stop thinking
I’ve been drinking I’ve been stinkin
wasting time with *******
I use to love this one chick well I thought I did
I fall through the cracks and landed on my back
I just really miss it can’t describe the feeling
Now my love resembles a empty skillet no fillin
They’ers nothing left to fill it now I gotta get it
It was all a lesson I’ve been counting all my blessings
I can be me when I’m all alone and nones knows
Who I am what I doo where I’m at how I move
Who are you? How ya do? This is my truth
I gotta keep it solid cause I’m getting nauseous
Getting sick of nonsense worlds a crazy concept
But I hear em voices talking and they keep on calling
I can’t stop i gotta rock it came with empty pockets
Oct 4, 2019
Oct 4, 2019 at 3:42 PM UTC
I will wait by the river
In the light of the moon
At the edge of this world
I will wait for you
No i cant wait forever
Someday ill be dead and gone
And i wont be forgiven
For what ive done
I will wait by the river
I will cry out to heaven
As it rains down on me
I will beg for forgiveness
Get down on my knees
If i cant change the weather
Maybe i can change your mind
If we cant be togather
Whats the point of life
I will wait by the river
Baby i didnt mean the things i said
I didnt honestly wish you were dead
Im a fool im just a man
If only i could hold you again
And the stars fill the river
As it flows into the sky
And the mind leaves the body
As it flows higher and higher
If we cant be togather
I will leave this world behind
If i cant touch your body
Can i touch the sky
I will wait by the river
Oct 4, 2019
Oct 4, 2019 at 3:40 PM UTC
you said that i was dumb
that im not fooling anyone
my words are sweet but my intentions are sour
I should just go to sleep, wake up in about an hour.
When my party’s done everyone left, you’re still here.
Telling me that i should just dissapear
Oct 4, 2019
Oct 4, 2019 at 3:39 PM UTC
Im so tired of living in pain-
I just want my head in the grave-
And pray to god im sent towards his heavenly ways-
With open arms to embrace-
And release the pain that i hate-
Cause im finished with living this way-
I made to many mistakes-
So i hope he forgives me today-
They say depression make you sicker each day-
I can see the symptoms within me eating away-
Now at a point in my life i cant turn back an change-
Mentally unstable to stay-
And i cant fix the trouble i made-
To be free of the burden i take-
I feel all alone in a world that is fake-
Why love got to hurt and treat me so great-
My mind over working the brain burning the breaks-
Dealing with hell when i let the creature escape-
And im just to tired to even relate-
got no spirit to give for what it takes-
With my feelings broken for to long-
Then i guess its just to late-
Oct 4, 2019
Oct 4, 2019 at 3:29 PM UTC
They laugh and I smile
I haven't felt this good about myself in awhile
I love making people laugh
It seems to be my craft
I can make everyone feel good with a quick bite of my tongue
...not everyone
I don't make you laugh anymore
I used to make us both laugh till we were sore
I don't think I'll ever make you laugh again
That's because you aren't my lover anymore and you aren't my friend
I'm actually sure you hate me now
It's strange how life can turn out
I saw you in a restaurant and you wouldn't even look at me
It makes me sad to remember how happy we used to be
I miss the sound of your laughter
I miss the conversations we would have after
Now, you probably laugh for someone else
But overthinking is bad for my health
Everyone else will laugh with me tonight
And I'll go home alone and be alright
But I'll try not to cry as I think about you
And all the laughing we used to do.
Aug 28, 2019
Aug 28, 2019 at 10:59 PM UTC
Like an old friend inviting you to come inside.
Familiar. Comforting.
It will grasp you in its arms and hold you close;
And when you're ready to leave, it wont let you go.
You will beg and plead to be happy,
and it will put up a fight.
It will make you think that the only way to escape it is to take your own life.
If you are lucky, you can break free;
and it will sit and watch you from afar.
Calling your name.
Welcoming you back into it's arms.
It will intrude your thoughts.
Make you think you are worthless.
That you're better off dead.
Just keep telling yourself that it's all in your head.
Keep moving. You will get far.
Depression is not who you are.
Aug 28, 2019
Aug 28, 2019 at 10:57 PM UTC
See this smile?
Isnt it perfect?
Isnt it beautiful?
I spent so long perfecting this hand crafted mask
and Everyone loves it
I mean it looks nice
It looks so..
Real
I like how it looks too
Though its not how i feel
I still like looking the role im supposed to play
Always happy
Always someones Ray of sunshine
I love it so much that i hate taking it off anymore
I dont want to have people concerned about me
I dont want anyone worrying about me and my insecurities
Its such a waste of valuable life
This mask has saved me and otheres so much
Its only ever failed me twice or so
I just
love it
Its hid the real me from the world
And
I know thats for the best
Of others
The people i love
And
Maybe even me
One day
I might convince myself i am happy
That i am loved
not for this perfect mask
But maybe loved for Who i really Am
If the world could even take that
Aug 28, 2019
Aug 28, 2019 at 10:56 PM UTC
Depression doesn’t just involve tears
Sometimes it’s feeling irrational fears.
Thinking I’m not good enough to do certain things
And when I try to do something, that doubt sings.
Other times, I could be tired
Unable to do things I once desired.
Throughout the day, I’m zoning out
And when I wake up, I just want to shout.
Depression doesn’t just involve tears.
I sit down in class, trying my best to ignore the stares.
As I look down at my feet, unable to feel
Sometimes I doubt my sadness is real.
Throughout the day, I find myself not caring.
About work or teachers or even those that are swearing.
And even when I get home, I still can’t place
Why life feels like such a race.
Depression doesn’t just involve tears.
Sometimes I’m just wondering whether anyone cares.
Most times I'm lying aimlessly in my bed.
Full of wordless thoughts in my head.
But I know, at least when I’m with her.
I’ll forget what all these feelings were.
With her by my side, I know I can experience that certain feeling
And then we can both start the process of healing.
Aug 28, 2019
Aug 28, 2019 at 10:55 PM UTC