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DulThaPoet
DulThaPoet
I'm not that complicated, i don't believe you can ever be someone else / I am my writing
I Don't Lack Confidence And I Don't Feel Like I Am Better Then Anybody Who Does But How Are You Suppose To Seek Opportunity If You're Against Your Own Potential Like Are You Really Going To Make That Decision To Go (Your Whole Life) Worried About What Everybody Else Thinks? What ***** Me Up Is Its Literally People Who Have Already Made That Choice Which 1 Is Not My Problem But 2 Their Going Through The Worst Form Of Suffering In Their Life Right Now. So When I'm Over Here Expressing Myself By Writing Statuses About Positive Sensitive Subjects Or Just Being Open And People Judge Me I Really Don't Feel Bad For Myself I Actually Feel Bad For Them Cause While Their Goal Is To Make Me Look Bad For A Couple Minutes Or How Ever Long. My Goal Is To Become A Better And Healthier Me Because I'm Not Going To Look Bad For The Rest Of My Life. I'm Just Not Gone Do It, This Is Why I Say Life Becomes Complicated When It Really Shouldn't Be If You Just Find A Way To Figure Out What Your True Intentions Are You'll Be Okay! These Walls That People Build Up And Say It's To Protect Themselves To Be Honest Your Not Protecting Yourself Your Caging Yourself In And I Totally Understand That Your Just Trying To Save The Best Part Of Yourself But It's To The Extent Your Trapping Your Own Self. Like It's Serious Because You Can't Even Encourage Yourself To Fight For Whatever It Is You Want And How Are You Going To Have Your Own Back When You Can't Even See Yourself? The Simplest Example I Can Give Is Like How We Are All Scared Of Rejection And We See The Most Fearless People Randomly Reaching Success Or Becoming Lucky In Life Regardless If It's With An Attempt Made To Get A Job Or Going Up To A Stranger To See If Something Can Spark Between The Two. It's Just Your True Intentions And Your Approach Simple As That, It's Like The First Step Of A Plan You Gotta Have It In Your Mind That With Anything You Do It's Not Good To Go In With High Exceptions Especially Dealing With A Person. It Can Be A Hit Or Miss And If You Miss You Could Of Still Did Everything Right It's Just The Wrong Time Or You Could Of Got Rejected And Your Approach Could Of Been Close To Perfect But The Person Or Job You Approach Wasn't Meant For You! And If You Hit! Meaning If Score And Get The Job Or The Person Being Fearless And Just Making The Attempt Could Change Your Life Forever. So You Don't Really Win Or Lose It's Just Sometimes You Miss And Sometimes You Don't.
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Mar 15, 2016
Mar 15, 2016 at 1:55 PM UTC
Perception #1
I Don't Lack Confidence And I Don't Feel Like I Am Better Then Anybody Who Does But How Are You Suppose To Seek Opportunity If You're Against Your Own Potential Like Are You Really Going To Make That Decision To Go (Your Whole Life) Worried About What Everybody Else Thinks? What ***** Me Up Is Its Literally People Who Have Already Made That Choice Which 1 Is Not My Problem But 2 Their Going Through The Worst Form Of Suffering In Their Life Right Now. So When I'm Over Here Expressing Myself By Writing Statuses About Positive Sensitive Subjects Or Just Being Open And People Judge Me I Really Don't Feel Bad For Myself I Actually Feel Bad For Them Cause While Their Goal Is To Make Me Look Bad For A Couple Minutes Or How Ever Long. My Goal Is To Become A Better And Healthier Me Because I'm Not Going To Look Bad For The Rest Of My Life. I'm Just Not Gone Do It, This Is Why I Say Life Becomes Complicated When It Really Shouldn't Be If You Just Find A Way To Figure Out What Your True Intentions Are You'll Be Okay! These Walls That People Build Up And Say It's To Protect Themselves To Be Honest Your Not Protecting Yourself Your Caging Yourself In And I Totally Understand That Your Just Trying To Save The Best Part Of Yourself But It's To The Extent Your Trapping Your Own Self. Like It's Serious Because You Can't Even Encourage Yourself To Fight For Whatever It Is You Want And How Are You Going To Have Your Own Back When You Can't Even See Yourself? The Simplest Example I Can Give Is Like How We Are All Scared Of Rejection And We See The Most Fearless People Randomly Reaching Success Or Becoming Lucky In Life Regardless If It's With An Attempt Made To Get A Job Or Going Up To A Stranger To See If Something Can Spark Between The Two. It's Just Your True Intentions And Your Approach Simple As That, It's Like The First Step Of A Plan You Gotta Have It In Your Mind That With Anything You Do It's Not Good To Go In With High Exceptions Especially Dealing With A Person. It Can Be A Hit Or Miss And If You Miss You Could Of Still Did Everything Right It's Just The Wrong Time Or You Could Of Got Rejected And Your Approach Could Of Been Close To Perfect But The Person Or Job You Approach Wasn't Meant For You! And If You Hit! Meaning If Score And Get The Job Or The Person Being Fearless And Just Making The Attempt Could Change Your Life Forever. So You Don't Really Win Or Lose It's Just Sometimes You Miss And Sometimes You Don't.
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1
I Feel Like The More You Try To Figure Life Out The More Confused You Become. I Can Literally Break My Perspective Down To Where It's Either You See It As Simple Or Confusing. For Example, When You Meet Someone That You Feel Is Better Then You Are Which Isn't True But That's Where Your Insecurities Come To Surface, What You Tell Yourself Becomes Your Reality. Instead Of Trying To Learn Or Find Out What Areas In Your Crazy *** Life Could Use Some Clean Up You Rather Waste Time Trying To Become Equal. Why? I Don't Understand, We Literally See People Who Have No Type Of Stability But Have The Best Attitudes About Surviving And Still Hold Themselves Highly. Why Don't You Examine Yourself When You Come Across That Type Of Person? When You Meet Somebody That Is Not As Good As You From Whatever Are Your Values Does That Make You Feel Good? Do You Actually Talk Yourself Up Because Someone Else Is Down! That's Confusing To Me I Can't Understand From A Low Level Of Perception, All I Can Come Up With Is That It's An Identity Constructed With A Combination Of ******** Sometimes You're Ahead And Sometimes You're Behind When Did That Become A Issue? People Struggling To Find A Grind But Them The Same People Who Remain Cool Under All Circumstances.I Respect Those People Because It's Not A Copy And Paste Mentality, That's A Pure Mind That These Comparing Hypocrites Are Trying Find.
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Mar 15, 2016
Mar 15, 2016 at 1:54 PM UTC
Perception #2
I Admire Watching The Little Kids Use All Their Energy In What They Do. I Admire How They Stand Up For What They Believe In Even Though Its A Super Hero From A TV Show Or Santa Clause Or Whatever It Is It's Like They're Prepared To Go To War For A Character Who's Just A Mental Inspiration And Hell Yeah They Can Be A Handful But You Watch Them Live For Moments That You Know They'll Never Get Back. Sad Thing Is They Don't Know That. Honestly It's Not For Them To Know Well At Least For Right Now It's Not. Because As You Get Older You Find That Life Begins To Wear You Down. It Doesn't Matter Who You Are Or How Good You Got It, It Just Happens. Experience, Time & Certain Events Really Conspire Against You To Steal Your Happiness Away And Corrupt Your Conscience & Confidence. Some People Call It Growing Up Which It Is But You Start To Question Every Single Thing You Would Never Have Given A Second Thought To When You Were Younger. The Worse Part Is You Don't See Yourself Fading Until You Wake Up One Day And You Don't Have That Fire In You Anymore, Like You've Been Defeated But You Wasn't Even Aware You Was In A Battle. All I'm Saying Is Be There For Your Kids And Let Them Know You're In There Corner Cause They Don't Know Whats Ahead And Its Your Job When The Time Comes For Them To Really Be Out Here Making Decisions To Not Just Know But Understand That In Life You Can Not Be Blind. You Have See More Then What Your Eyes Allow You To.
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Mar 15, 2016
Mar 15, 2016 at 1:51 PM UTC
Growing & Going
Your Eyes Reveal What Your Face Always Tries To Hide Which Is The Pain I'm Afraid For You The Inhale Exhale Routine Isn't Made For You You Go Days Without A Laugh & Weeks Without A Smile You Even Wake Up Screaming Without Fully Being Asleep You're Losing Control Your Anxiety Seems To Be Higher Then All Consumable Drugs Put Together What Hurts The Most, I Been There I Been Lost Without Wanting To Be Found I Became Addicted To Abusing Drugs I Been Left When I Needed To Be With Somebody At That Time Of My Life The Most What Do I Have To Do For You To Let Me In? Scream It, I'm Not Sure That Would Be Enough So What Is More Then Enough To Balance Out Not Enough At All? What Do I Have To Do For You To Let Me In? Physical I'm Here! Emotionally I'm Here If Your Eyes Can't See It I'll Pay A Visit To The House Of God And Ask Him To Allow Your Heart To See What Your Eyes Cant I'm Here
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Mar 15, 2016
Mar 15, 2016 at 1:49 PM UTC
Here
I'm Not Going To Discuss How Much Of My Time I Invested In You Because That Time Is Gone Regardless Of How I Feel At This Very Moment I'm Never Getting That Back We Share That Time Together Equally Two Complete Opposite People Who Tolerated Each Others Flaws Learning To Love Each Other Is What I Would Call That Time Went By We Started Hurting Each-Other I Realized That I Couldn't Be Hurt Without You You Became My Drug A Long Time Ago I Never Asked You To Give Me Anything That I Haven't Already Worked For I'm Not Sure If You Telling Me To Be Something I Already Am Which Is A Man With Something A Lot Of Men Don't Have Potential ... My Sensitivities Is Mine And I Have To Own It Lets Forget About Right & Wrong For A Second After Every Morning Night, Month, Year Of A Combination Of Happy, Sad, Hurt, Confused, Deep, Weird Amount Of Time That We Shared Equally You Wanna Start Over? Okay Look I Look At It From A Wanting To Try Something New Point Of View How Many Times Are You Going To Waste Your Time Getting Let Down Hurt Just Cause You Want To Try Something New Venting Session This Is You Can't Just Say You Love Somebody Without Being Able To Show It It Will Never Be Real I'm Real & After All My Time I'm Really Still Here So It Can't Be Me No Matter How Many Times You Try & Play Victim We'll Both Know The Truth..
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Mar 4, 2016
Mar 4, 2016 at 7:02 PM UTC
Unedited Thoughts
I've Been Drinking Poison I'm Surprise That I Can Stand Every Other Cup I Realize How Trapped I Really Am Dying Inside Dear Lord I Need Healing From Within No Matter How Hard I Try How Much I Battle The Stress Positions Me For The Pin How Do You Reconcile When The Trust Is Broken How Can You Not Become Affected When The Wound Still Open We All Get Hurt At Some Point In Our Lives I Wonder Who Is Responsible For You Being This Cole Cause I'm Paying The Price When All I Did Was Love Your Soul I'm Stuck In Reverse You Drove Me To Crash The World Isn't Going To Stop For My Grief This Is The Mother Of Sad If I Can Go Back To The Day We Met I'd Tell You To Watch Out For Yourself Because In The Future I'm That Moment That You Let Slip Away You Should Be Ashamed Of Yourself
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Mar 4, 2016
Mar 4, 2016 at 7:00 PM UTC
Piece Of My Vent
I Want To Say Thank You Not Only To You But To God I Get It Now! He Specifically Chose You To Be The Perfect Lesson For My Life I Had A Hard Time Understanding I Prayed To Him Every Night That He'd Bring You Back Into My Life And You Came But It Was Never For Good Then I Realize The Reason You Never Stayed Is Because You Didn't Come Back As An Angel With Wings You Came Back As A Devil With Horns You Put A Line Between My Heart So Fast I Was Convinced You Was Some Sort Of Super Human Like The Flash Before You I Thought I Knew What A Heart Break Felt Like A Little Pain In Your Chest Here & There Weak Knees At Times & Ache Behind Your Eyes When Your Thinking Of That Person People Tell You No Matter How Much They Try And Explain Something To You'll Only Understand When You're Going Through It You Don't Know Love Until You Know Real Pain You Don't Know Love Until You Know That Things Will Never Be The Exact Same Again Lessons Teach You To See It Coming Basically Allows You To Begin Your Numbness
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Mar 4, 2016
Mar 4, 2016 at 6:58 PM UTC
After The Break
Can A Heart Ever Be Made Unbreakable? Is There An Actually Plan You Need To Come Up With To Get To That Point? All I Need To Know Is That Its Possible I'm Tired Of Feeling Like Chips In A Bag People Get Me Open Just To Get A Quick Bite Then Toss Me To The Side I'm Tired Of Having To Solve Things I Didn't Create By Myself I Don't Expect Anything Because I Know Nothing Is Guaranteed What's A Life? We Dying To Live The Good Ones Don't Live To Long, The Bad Ones Live A Little Longer Inspiration Is My Mother Honesty Is My Father The Day I Choose To Pick Up And Leave I Hope My Heart Is On The Next Plane After Me Because There's Nothing Here Worth Pursuing I Don't Think It Notices That Yet So I'm Stuck In A Power Struggle And It Absorbs Me For everything I Have I'm Getting Robbed By Something That Has No Physical Form You Can't Call The Cops For That! So I Guess I'm Crazy
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Mar 2, 2016
Mar 2, 2016 at 11:43 AM UTC
Closed
Once Upon A Time I Got Tired Of Having So Much To Say But No Way To Make Sense Of It. I Got Tired Of Not Knowing When The Right Time And Place Was To Show My Emotions. So You Know What I Did, I Treated My Feelings Like A Song, Words Became Lyrics And Emotions Became Music. I Started To Understand What It Is I Feel Just Like In A Song You Listen To The Lyrics To Understand What The Songs About. It Didn't Matter About The Time And Place No More. They Say Silence Speaks When Words Cant But Who's Hearing You If Your Not Even Open To Share For Them To Listen Regardless If You Believe It Or Not Your Worth Being Heard. I'm Not To Good To Be True, I'm Real! Physically I Can Be Touched Mentally I Can Be Challenged Emotionally I'm Expressive Because Unexpressed Emotions Never Die. The Moral Of This Is Its Just In My Nature To Bring Words To Life I'm Not A Cliche. Lets Say Your Life Was A Puzzle I'm Just A Piece Trying To Figure Out If There's A Place To Fit. Lets Say If The Only Way To Reach Your Heart Is By Getting Into An Ocean, I'm Afraid Of Drowning But I'm Going To Swim Because I Know If I Make It To Your Heart I Wont Be Coming Back To The Surface Alone. You The One That's Not Going To Get Away From Me Because I Love You And That's All I Got
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Mar 2, 2016
Mar 2, 2016 at 11:42 AM UTC
Luv
I Know You Trust Me I Know Somewhere Inside You There's A Part That Loves Me I Know He Made Mistakes I Know That Mentally You Wish The Memories Could Just Be Washed Away I Know That Your Past Isn't Baggage I Know That You Wish It Wasn't Your Heart That He Damaged I Know You Say You'll Be Okay But That Day Isn't Today I Know Your Favorite Phase Is ****** Ain't **** I Know When I Walked Into Your Life You Would Of Never Thought That I'll Be Him Who Is Him? The Guy That Takes Every Opportunity To Make You Smile The Guy That Understands Your Old Wounds Are Healing So For You To Fall Completely Would Be Awhile So His Mistakes Was My Opportunity Perfect Or Not You And Me Is All I Ever Wanted My Dream Girl In Physical Form God Delivered On His Promise I Don't Even Know When You Became So Important To Me But I Want You To Know Good Or Bad Your Past Is Your Past And Your Here At-least I Know It Was For A Reason
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Mar 2, 2016
Mar 2, 2016 at 11:39 AM UTC
His Mistakes