Did you notice as you were packing
I was too
Packing up things to give away
Shedding what we don’t need
Emptying the nest
Literally
And now the house is a mess
There are boxes all around
Books off their shelves
Things out of place
It’s not going to get better unless I take a stab
At cleaning
Organizing
Transitioning
Because the house is just a mess
Without you
Oct 2, 2018
Oct 2, 2018 at 1:53 PM UTC
The three phrases I was given
At a time I thought
I could not go on
I want to share with you
You did not cause it
You can not control it
You can not cure it
Someone who understood pain and loss
Shared these words with me
I did not cause it
I can not control it
I can not cure it
I repeated them during my morning runs
I put them on my to do list
I read them aloud everyday
It wasn’t until it became my mantra
That it sunk in
At first I fought against them
My mind taking over
As it often does
With overthinking
And inflicting painful thoughts
If I only I did it differently...
I did not cause it
If I only I do this now...
I can not control it
If only you would...
I can not cure it
I did not heal
Until I realized
I really did not cause it
I really can not control it
I really can not cure it
But I can chose to
... Cope
I can choose to survive
I can choose to love myself despite the reasons these words became important
In the first place
Now I give them to you
Sep 28, 2018
Sep 28, 2018 at 1:05 PM UTC
I really think if you told your mom
You would be surprised
I hope the surprise is that she’s there for you
And that she finds the right words
Because she’s your mom
And if the surprise is hurtful
Remember the words you told me once
She may be grieving
Not because she is disappointed
But because she didn’t know
Because she doesn’t really know what it all means
Because she couldn’t find the right words at the right time
But more importantly,
Because she was the last to know
Mothers don’t like to be the last to know
We were once the first to see everything
Then we were demoted
Yet we saw more then we got credit for
Now that our children are grown and gone
It’s different
We rely on tidbits, small talk, holiday visits, sibling rumors
Mothers are often the last to know
But no matter what
And no matter how we react
When we are finally told
Or if we are never told
Every secret
Every heartbreak
Every silly encounter
A mother’s love is so strong
Our love is forever
I really think if you told your mom
You would be surprised
Sep 15, 2018
Sep 15, 2018 at 11:08 AM UTC
he told his mom about me
and it just made me appreciate him even more than i already did
to know that someone is proud to have me
is a feeling that i am not yet used to
to know that there is no fear in his mind
when he reaches for my hand in public
because he wants to hold it
and he doesn't care what people think
and i just feel good
because i feel lucky to be with someone
who wanted to tell their mom about me
Sep 11, 2018
Sep 11, 2018 at 2:03 PM UTC
You say he is our favorite child
We say there are no favorites
He was just easier
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 10:43 AM UTC
by telling me you didn't like it when i dyed my hair, you were telling me that you didn't like me. maybe you didn't realize that, but i did and i'll never forget it.
Aug 3, 2018
Aug 3, 2018 at 2:46 PM UTC
i paint my nails yellow
because yellow is beautiful
and yellow makes me happy
and nothing bad can happen when the sun sets and gold streams through the windows in my house
i paint my nails yellow
because it's a reminder to smile
a reminder that there is good in this worls
so
i paint my nails yellow
Aug 3, 2018
Aug 3, 2018 at 2:42 PM UTC