I feel as though I have choked something up tonight,
As though my bones are creaking back to life.
I feel as thought the mist is thinning
my eyes are clearer
my head's not pounding
the chattering mouths have ceased around me.
I feel as though my lungs can breath,
It's not an action forced by me;
There's cherry trees, their blossoms bobbing
my racing, weeping heart's stopped throbbing
that's not my chest that I feel sobbing
don't let me muse don't let me think
and quickly pass another drink
Mar 3, 2018
Mar 3, 2018 at 10:19 PM UTC
I lean over the toaster,
Cig clinging to chapped lip skin,
Tip brushing electric wire,
A burst of smoke, aha!
(My Mam stole my lighter.)
Instead of lovely nicotine
My fringe burns in front of me.
And I wish this was
A witty metaphor
For my ****** life,
A humorous illustration,
But instead it is
Just a woeful addition.
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 11:55 AM UTC
There's little in taking or giving,
There's little in water or wine;
This living, this living, this living
Was never a project of mine.
Oh, hard is the struggle, and sparse is
The gain of the one at the top,
For art is a form of catharsis,
And love is a permanent flop,
And work is the province of cattle,
And rest's for a clam in a shell,
So I'm thinking of throwing the battle--
Would you kindly direct me to hell?
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 10:54 AM UTC
One query that I have today,
Is why do we look down to pray?
And when we wish, we raise our eyes
Heavenwards, beyond our skies?
This troubles me, and I'll explain:
Tis the principle that brings me pain.
In prayer, should we not face our Lord,
Positioned there to be adored?
And shouldn't shame lower our gaze
Towards the roaring souls ablaze,
Crushed beneath the Devil's dancing,
Should we not face him in fancy?
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 10:46 AM UTC
But I've been told otherwise!
Past and present, I protest,
And he sneers.
What makes me so,
I query?
And he relents but says instead I'm just
nothing special
And the harsh slap of mediocrity stings
My greatest fear
To be
That nothing person
Face in the crowd person
The deadly sea of in between
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 8:45 AM UTC
What is left to forget?
The searing trial of my regret
Softened its grip on my mind
With each passing glass of wine.
At fortunes mercy, alas
I'm compelled to fill my glass.
Come clairvoyant, read my palm?
To prevent the spilling of your yarn
I'll hand you a cup of ****
-My dear, what will come of this?
I'm saving your credibility
You'd be a fool not to see
That my futures tainted red,
As my kidneys slowly bled.
He at blame, he turned around
And told me that I should slow down.
Pray tell then dear, what should I do?
Live by the needle, just like you?
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 6:16 AM UTC
Hang me from the Heavens, tell
All pray God to save my soul
But half; for evil is not whole
And send the rest to Hell.
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 6:11 AM UTC
In winter, we went.
Clandestine, beneath the crispest sky,
Armed with carrier bags and clippers
Undisturbed by passers-by.
And frosty twigs cracked underfoot,
The trees around were starved of life.
A landscape drained of colour, and you alike,
As you looked at us, but saw your wife.
We strode through greying groups of bushes
Hems caught on outstretched arms of thorns.
I struggled; how could we three seem together
Yet underneath, I knew we'd torn.
We talked of life, and things before
Our time, we talked of war.
You grappled through the crunchy, ashen leaves
To find the perfect stick to whittle.
Kicking 'round carcasses of trees once grand
Now dusty gray, worn and brittle.
And there! In clusters, what we'd sought
Had ****** the life blood from the day
And would release a drop for nought
Trapped in bursting beads so gay.
Them voluptuous, glowing knots
Crowned by pointed varnished leaves
Would shine clipped to a lady's breast
But would do instead for our wreaths.
Jan 15, 2015
Jan 15, 2015 at 4:38 AM UTC
Hindsight, how you cruelly cast
Sour light upon my memories.
There's no one here left to please
-unfortunately, no one to share
The glowering of the devils glare.
They left, each one followed suit.
Who am I to point the finger,
Can't blame those who didn't linger,
Would I have done?
Can't say I would;
It's sad to watch a life be drained
To watch it be reduced to grain
And sadder still, with such potential,
Oh, it's such a waste they'll say!
I'm ruined further by high hopes,
If they hadn't said I could I wouldn't be
Torn between the life they chose to live through me.
It's not my own reality
I was told, I'd fulfil all dreams
Though not my own, so it seems.
Jan 14, 2015
Jan 14, 2015 at 6:40 AM UTC
To the girls who are secretly so broken
You WILL be alright
I know you have scars on your soul
Maybe your heart
Possibly your wrists
None of this is your fault
And even if you think it is
Let it go
Not that you can, that easily
But try
I know you are broken
I know you're not okay
Especially when people ask how you are and you answer "I'm fine"
When what you really mean is "I'm alive"
But what do you really care about your own survival anymore
Well I just want you to know
There is beauty in broken glass
And to me
There is immeasurable beauty
In broken girls
So don't you ever forget
You cannot be defined by pain
You're too beautiful for that
Stay strong, broken girl
Nothing is ever really broken
Jan 14, 2015
Jan 14, 2015 at 6:06 AM UTC