My crush?
She knows exactly who she is
To much?
Honestly no not at all
Because
I need the pain you put me through
No matter what
I'll always be here for you
And that pain only makes me stronger to do the things I couldn't before
So whenever monsters come clawing at your door
I can be by your side with a sword in my hands
These feelings have been bubbling inside me long before Destiny took a chance
I must admit when Destiny took you away it hurt
Pulling you away cut me deep
So deep I thought I couldn't heal
But I made painkillers
I made bandages
I made my own stiches
And I became a nurse
I did it all on my own and I nursed my broken heart back to health
So now it's pumping
But everything I do is off the beat
Syncopated
I've concentrated on my self
And I am the problem
I am the wrong notes
I stayed low on my bass clef
So I could avoid the treble
Because you are there
And your snare keeps up with the tempo
I know I'm lagging
No matter what I do
I find myself dagging my body back to you
Hoping to have a dream come true and to make a happy ending
But yes I know
I can't force you to love me
But now yea I must confess
I'm unstable and I can't take it
Honestly
I think I love you
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 11:29 PM UTC
Hold my hand
Guide me through the empty plane
Delight in your eye
I can see the happiness in the glass
Run with me through the Autumn breeze
Autumn leaves breaking beneath our feet
Cool winds whipping your cheeks turning pink
Our steps walking on narrow sidewalks
Naked trees
Faded greens orange and browns
Spread freely around us
Holding us as I hold your hand
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 6:24 AM UTC
In the distance I hear chanting
A song
Warning me
Calling out the inevitable truths that await
Death
A sea of souls surround my raft
Begging me to join them
As I drift upon wave after wave of those spirits
And toss and turn over tombstones
I am trapped in a purgatory awaiting rescue
Should I sink or swim?
Swim to a church pew
Live and die by the cross
Listen as he screams once more
Salvation and saliva flying from his lips
Although
I don't know which is more revolting
Or should I sink
Sink into the abyss in which I believe IS the afterlife
The cold darkness
The nothingness cradled in the heart of an atheist
Sometimes I wonder
Is a soul worth holding on to?
Because it's so much easier to tread water without it weighing me down
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 10:25 PM UTC
Pockets full of hopes and dreams
Draining away
Dying
Today my mind flows like a river
Connected to a waterfall
Splashing below drowning my memory of you and mixing them with others
The night reminds me of a piano
Hidden in the darkness
The sound of your voice echoing through my room
The sound of your laugh is music to my ears
I don't want it to end
I whisper to the shadows that surround me
Just stay away from her
Swallow me alive
**** me if you must
But stay away from her
Please leave her
I listen to her song
Completely at ease
My bed reminds me of fall leaves sailing to the ground
Kissing the earth and crushing against it
Relaxing
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 10:23 PM UTC
I remember walking into the school building
The hallways seemed to be more hurried then it was normally
The air dense but withstandable
I remember hearing words fly from the mouths of other students
Words I barely new the meaning of
Death
It was everywhere poisoning the hallways
The classrooms
It seemed to be stuck on the ceiling and walls like gas
But I woar a mask of doubt
It couldn't be true
It just couldn't
Rumors!
My mind screamed to me
Rumors terrible rumors!
Lies they lie to me!
I went into my classroom
Keeping calm
Then my teacher said it...
"I know you've all have heard of Alexandra's death. She drowned, counselors will be free all week, if anyone needs to talk..."
My mask was pulled off my face
I was now choking on all the gas that made up the reality around me
I searched for something to tell me this was a joke... a dream... anything but real
I began to cry
Tears not like a leaky pipe
But like a waterfall
Much like the one she drowned in
I began to drown
Although metaphorically
She drowned physically
Her body was pulled beneath waves of water and it took her life
And took her away from me
Those days I didn't understand completely
But a drastic change overtook me
I began to see death
He bagan to walk by my side
The sound of gurgling water filled my ears at night
The picture of her face and beneath the surface of the water blinded my eyes she screamed
She cried
But her tears were washed away by the current
And I stood on the side of the river
Watching her drown
I stood without out a sound
As the bubbles grew fewer and the struggling ceased
I stood sickened
Why couldn't it be me
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 9:53 PM UTC
I thought my body was a vault
That nothing could get into
But lately security's been low
And something slipped in
Sometimes sneaky
Something sly
Something blind to the human eyes
A disease that causes my head to hang
A virus that causes internal pain
A cold that makes me shallow my words
A sickness that lurks inside me
Cutting each breath short
Making each sentence incomplete
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 9:00 PM UTC