*For far too long, had I seen myself with their eyes
A meagre splash of color on a canvas so wide
A withered flower, though wrong it did seem
Conflicts there were though, with the inner me
Cocooned was I, in self loathing now & then*
**But then I broke free, pushing away from them
And now I see it, how wonderful He made me
I wish I hadn't whined away, in pointless self pity
Now don't you do it, the way I did it wrong
Blackout the world hon, you're a-okay to go !**
Jan 11, 2016
Jan 11, 2016 at 7:06 PM UTC
Are you okay?
I am breathing.
You should stop.
Why?
Why not?
Stop it, you're in my head.
Yes and it is a horrible place.
I know.
You should do something about it.
Like what?
Do you see that gun?
Jul 24, 2015
Jul 24, 2015 at 11:38 AM UTC
Thoughtless future commitments aiming only to make the present better.
Jul 23, 2015
Jul 23, 2015 at 5:46 AM UTC
one. I walked you to your car, and made sure that each part of you was safely seated before i closed the door. once i got in the passengers seat, i told you to buckle up, and when you didnt, i reached over the center console and kissed you as i carefully grabbed your seat belt and strapped you in. you rolled your eyes at me, told me you loved me and grabbed my hand and kissed it. i asked you to keep both hands on the wheel.
two. I put my hands up your shirt and rested my head on your chest when we were laying down, just so i could count your heartbeats. so i could feel your heartbeats and so my head would rise and fall with your ribcage. i ran my fingers through your hair, and whispered alive against your skin. i kissed your collarbone, your chest, your stretch marks. you asked me to stop, you told me you loved me but it tickled. i told you i adored your laugh.
three. I tried to be as close to you as i could. i asked you to come to a haunted house with me, and i let the sound of your laughter fill my ears. i know i get scared easily, that was the point. i gave you directions for the longest way possible so we could spend more time together. i turned on your favorite song, and watched your lips move. when the hum of your voice made its way to my ears, i closed my eyes and let my head lean back. i held your arm through the entire haunted house. i jumped closer to you whenever i heard a sound, i buried my face into the crook of your neck, even when i wasn't scared. you laughed at me for so long, pulling me into you each time you did and told me you loved me. i pressed my ear against your chest and listened to the way it resonated.
four. Sweet dreams
four. i care about you
four. how are you?
four. are you okay?
four. did you get home safe?
four.
five. I didnt yell back. I wiped your tears away when they escaped your eyes, as mine fell and shattered into my lap. i kissed your collarbone, and i pulled myself closer, even when i was shoved away. i squeezed my eyes shut, like if i closed them hard enough, i could unhear that this was my fault. i touched your neck, right under your hairline, and i told you i cared about you. you told me that you couldn't wait for me to say it anymore, that you didn't know if i loved you or not. i told you to drive safe, and i watched you walk away. i saw you put on your seatbelt and look at me. i watched you start the car with tears in your eyes.
Jul 21, 2015
Jul 21, 2015 at 3:14 PM UTC
i want someone to hold me.
and say "i love you"
to me.
im not desperate..
i just lack love in my life.
Jul 21, 2015
Jul 21, 2015 at 3:47 AM UTC
Fetching Your old loving self, won't be that difficult for me.
But I am very uninterested in a person who changes that fast.
Jul 18, 2015
Jul 18, 2015 at 8:51 AM UTC
***Eyeballs banging hard on the lids
Yet lashes entwine to keep them in
Frightened I am, for what they might see
My last breath, walking away with thee.***
Jul 17, 2015
Jul 17, 2015 at 10:39 PM UTC
I know i lost you when you stopped saying Goodnight
When the kisses that imprinted my lips felt empty
When i felt less alone when you were gone
I knew i lost you when i saw how you looked at her.
Jul 16, 2015
Jul 16, 2015 at 9:40 PM UTC
***I swear ! I had it right there !
Inside this Carcass O' Despair
Then when you came out of the blue
Maybe I lost it when I saw You ?***
Jul 16, 2015
Jul 16, 2015 at 7:40 PM UTC