I'm triggered
It feels like a bullet wound to my head
Like daggers to my chest
I'm stir crazy
I'm all alone
There's a breath on my neck
I'm not even safe at home
arms tighten at my throat and I can't breathe
I'm leaking from arousal
I don't want it but I can't speak
"You're so wet for me"
I don't want to be
I'm triggered
Nobody can love what is tainted
Aug 18, 2020
Aug 18, 2020 at 3:08 AM UTC
I used to want a lover
Like the boys in the books
Until I met you,
Now I want books with boys who are
Lovers like you
May 11, 2020
May 11, 2020 at 8:56 AM UTC
He is my vermilion
His cheeks adorned with the love of the sun
His scarlet hair caught in the gaps of my fingers
Burning passion into my lungs.
A reason to keep breathing
He is my vermilion
Before him I was all but a black hole, my life sinking into oblivion
Lifeless living until he- a mercuric sulfide gem had me falling head first
For him I paint the blue left of me, red
Every time his chest is where I lay my head
Pieces of him have fallen through the crevices of my broken heart
Now I hurt every time we have to part
I fell in love with him before I even knew
Now that I do
He is the colour of my love
He is the colour of my life
Feb 4, 2019
Feb 4, 2019 at 4:30 AM UTC
Zestful is his demeanor
Alluring is his mind
Young he is at heart
Noble he is on a whole
Omnipotent is his soul
Nurturing he is, most of all
And a letter of his name starts each line of this poem
Nov 19, 2018
Nov 19, 2018 at 7:03 AM UTC
I've been told never to let the Devil in
My 'no' had fallen upon deaf ears and he'd invited sin
My cries were blanketed by fear
As I sat in the loudest silence you'd ever hear
His hand held tight upon my thigh
Nobody would look me in my eye
Bruised and battered I couldn't cry for help
His fingers crawled deeper and I'd accepted the card I was dealt
I wanted to say something to somebody
But I couldn't bare the idea of being blamed by everybody
Healing is on the front porch
But I'm too weak to unlock the front door
"I told you not to wear that dress."
"Now look you're a ******* mess"
I can't fall asleep at night
I hear my mothers lack of sympathy
And I can't help but think that she was right
Sep 27, 2018
Sep 27, 2018 at 3:32 AM UTC
Silent
for months
Mute
with the inability to say much
Weakened
by the idea that healing had to be rushed
The soul is
Painted
with the idea that the heart was crushed
Bits and pieces of the muscle
Pierced
within itself
Lost
With no idea how to start a search
Tears
like acid
Set the body
Ablaze
like a Phoenix on fire
Feelings
It came out like ****
Oozing
from an infected wound
Plaster
Like super glue
Guarded
Like Cartier necklaces far too
Precious
to put at risk of hurt
Sep 20, 2018
Sep 20, 2018 at 3:12 AM UTC
i t s f u c k e d u p i s i t n o t ?
w e l a y h e r e p r e g n a n t w i t h t h i n g s w e d a r e n o t
s a y
b o t t l e i t u p u n i l i t g u s h e s o u t o f u s l i k e
w a t e r f r o m a f a u c e t
a n d t h e b o t t l e i s g l a s s s h a t t e r e d i n t o
s h a r d s o f g l a s s
p i e r e c i n g t h r o u g h m y l u n g s
m a k i n g i t j u s t a b o u t i m p o s s i b l e
t o b r e a t h e
Jun 4, 2018
Jun 4, 2018 at 9:46 AM UTC
Never good...
They're all heavy dreamers, spewing out promises like its a fvckin rap verse
and when it's time to pull through, excuses are their favourite hooks..
Struggling artists never wake up, they stay stuck and damage you with a glue gun in the process,
hard part is you always think that you're in love and you always go back, it's like abuse.
Jun 2, 2018
Jun 2, 2018 at 4:19 PM UTC
I miss her too you know?
The girl I used to be
She's been gone,
Hibernating from this ice cold earth
They don't deserve any of what she's worth
As frostbite teased the very tips of her heart,
in pain
Her only fear was that she may never feel again
As the tears traveled down my cheeks, with the inability to speak
I know that I have failed her
All that I had once felt has turned into the nothingness he felt
He'd judged her, for loving love
It is the shallow emptiness of the walls my fingers fill, desolate of emotion
It is not my own, but those of the people whose juices I thought would colour my world
Re inviting the old me in.
Unable I was to discover my old self
But still solace is found
For from fire She will return
As recent tears are dried before escaping the ducts
I am warm
Even at a distance from the winter sun
I am warm
Because a Phoenix Unconquered is the old me
May 23, 2018
May 23, 2018 at 2:46 AM UTC
Your eyes became the marble floors
Your smile the French doors
Your voice the welcoming tone
When your arms wrap around me
I feel at Home
Apr 9, 2018
Apr 9, 2018 at 2:55 AM UTC