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AutumnMarie
AutumnMarie
I gave you my all, and watched you choose better. I gave you my all, because you promised me forever. I gave you my all, while you went behind my back. Was it because she had what I lack? I gave you my all each time you wanted to leave, because I didn’t see I was being naive. I ranted and I quoted, “no he’s devoted”. Looking back, I feel I’m in the midst of a heart attack. I don’t know what to do, I’m simply lost without you. I gave you my all and ignored every warning, even when I knew; soon I’d be in mourning. Mourning the love you had for me, as I slowly watched it flea. Do you know what this has done to my insides? It divides my head from my heart. And that’s only the start. I’ve given you my all, and you’ve made me feel so breathtakingly small. Please I beg of you; tell me, why wasn’t I enough? Is it because I’m messed up? Or that my words come out a little rough? I’ve never experienced this amount of numbness pouring from my heart. It really is ripping me apart.
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Nov 9, 2018
Nov 9, 2018 at 4:46 AM UTC
I Gave You My All.
You broke and dismembered me, But of course I’ll never let you see.      Disregard that fake smile, I’ve been practicing it for quite a while. It falters behind my closed doors, For there is where I fight my wars.    I hate being in here anymore, I hate everything I used to adore. All the things I found comfort in, Now wrap me in an abundance of sin. My morning and late afternoon coffee, it now makes my eyes glossy. My warm blankets and soft bed,   I’m too afraid to rest my head.    You’ve taken every safe place,     because now they all remind me of your face.
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Mar 18, 2018
Mar 18, 2018 at 3:24 PM UTC
No safe places
I've seen them come I've seen them go. The aftermath of a heartless show. They're steps ahead while you're steps behind. Their echoing footsteps your peace of mind. Rewind, rewind, rewind, repeat. Eventually you're alone with defeat. Unless you change your way of thought. And learn self love is where love is taught.
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Mar 18, 2018
Mar 18, 2018 at 12:57 AM UTC
Self Love
Don't you dare look at me with those eyes You don't own my body anymore Not these freckles that litter my skin Or the bruises that ink my calves Your big blue eyes were never there to fall in love with me But rather to teach me a lesson The lesson being that before I fall in love with anyone else I must first fall in love with myself.
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Mar 18, 2018
Mar 18, 2018 at 12:56 AM UTC
Self love
You left, like everyone else. Excuses you spat, just to get away. Just like that. “Too thin” you said, but you never complained in bed. “Not healthy enough”, oh those words were rough. I begged your forgiveness, not caring who witnessed. “I’ll eat more, I promise.”, hoping my words would give you solace. My only desire was to keep you. But away you flew. Along with my sanity, where’s your humanity? You didn’t care that I was sick, oh no, now I know your trick. Just another guy thinking with his **** How could you, I was at my peak. I should’ve known, you only prey on the weak.
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Mar 18, 2018
Mar 18, 2018 at 12:43 AM UTC
Prey