Putting up Big Walls?
Yes! A cage? Yes!
Big walls! A Cage!
I was living, for years.
I was too shy to face those eyes,
too afraid to be judge,
to be unseen,
to be unworthy.
I am Scared.
Scared to do mistakes,
Scared to face a lot of people,
Scared to watch those judgmental acts,
eyes,
voice,
So for years,
I just decided
to stay in my cage.
I am just scared of the world.
Feb 16, 2020
Feb 16, 2020 at 2:04 AM UTC
It was a lonely night,
Hearing those rain drops at the roof,
As i decided to scroll a facebook page,
"Maria"
Going to her older post,
Older post
Older post
Till I reach this letter of her,
Dear Z,
Here's the line.
I'm drawing this 'cause I badly need one:
To remind me that you'll never be mine,
'Cause I fear that loving someone so much will destroy me.
For me to always remember how you give your time to me but you're texting with her simultaneously.
To mark my words, that I will leave this place, this city where I met you; and
To remember how I pictured you on your wedding day with her,
You couldn't just be happier.
Chasing you,
Maria.
Never I know,
That was an old letter of her
to my boyfriend.
May 10, 2019
May 10, 2019 at 1:28 AM UTC
Dear diary. May 12 . Friday.
"Gettin' up was the first mistake I made today
Maybe if I'd stayed in bed I wouldn't hurt this way
For now I'll have to face the world admit that we're all through
And begin my first day without you."
I wake up today with dry tears and punch of eyebags.
Scrolling my phone. And here again, i received a text from him saying "im tired" i cant help but burst tears again. So i decided to off my social media's. And to be brave to blocked him to avoid bursting my tears again. Cause i know, you will never come back again and i cant do anything but to see you walking away.
Diary, now, i have to fixed my things. Cause ill be leaving far away today with a heavy heart.
May 10, 2019
May 10, 2019 at 1:24 AM UTC
I.
There's a fear in my eyes when I see you
All tomorrows appear in a blink
Fearing there'd be day when I will awake
And I wouldn't find you near
There are days when the pasts seem to shadow
All the hope that you've gathered for me
But then the darkness fades and then I awake
And I feel love setting us free
Chorus:
And all at once, all fears disappear
Knowing that I have you here
Though lies may come, there's nothing I can't do.
For I see His promise when I look at you."
II.
So I thank you for all of your patience
For loving me even when I explode
Taking all of the pain but nothing else to gain
Just knowing I don't feel alone
Oh I promise that I'll always choose you
I will trust you wherever you lead
And when there are days when you'll feel afraid
I promise I won't walk away
Chorus:
Coz all at once my future is here
It's better than all of my dreams
Though storms may come, there's nothing I can't do
For He keeps His promise, and the promise is you
III.
So I stand here today with a promise
That together we'll run towards love
That I know there are days whether it shines or it rains
Together we'll lift up a praise
And when our time here has ended
And God asks me what I had been through
I would lay at His feet all our victories
And thank Him for giving me you
I'll always thank Him for giving me you
Chorus:
Through battles won, and fears overcome
I found a faithful one
Through highs and lows
You will never be alone
Forever and always
My forever and always
Forever and always
I love you, my home
Jan 15, 2019
Jan 15, 2019 at 6:47 AM UTC
Nasasaktan ko na siya,
Oo nasasaktan ko na siya,
Sa mga iniisip kung wala namang kabulaanan,
Sa bawat pagdududa ko na wala namang ebidensya,
Sa bawat hinahagip nang isip at puso ko na wala namang katuturan,
kasi pinaniwalaan ko ang katagang
"womens instinct is always right"
pero hindi,
hindi sa lahat ng oras tama tayo
hindi sa lahat ng araw mga hinala natin ay totoo,
bagkus, sa kalulunod sa ka kaiisip ko na may mali, ay nilulunod ko na pala ang "Siya" ang "Tayo" ang "Kami"
Hindi ko na namalayan,
na hinihila ko na sya papalayo,
na ang pundasyon ay unti unting winawasak ko
sa kaiisip na akoy niloloko pa rin,
Hindi ko namalayan,
na naging makasarili na pala ako,
pero hindi ko pa rin maiwasang mag isip,
pero nilalabanan ko
hanggang sa nakita ko nalang
ang "Siya" ang taong mahal ko
duguan ang puso, napapagod na ang katawan,
Napagtanto ko, Hindi ko lang sinasaktan ang Sarili ko
kundi NASASAKTAN KO NA RIN SYA PALA.
Dec 20, 2018
Dec 20, 2018 at 1:42 AM UTC
Last night, as 12 midnight striked, I talked to God about you ans prayed to bless you today, and always.
I know, God knows the best for you, for HE love you that much.
Yes! i love you but God love you even more as much as i do.
I surrendered everything to HIM, to take care of you, guide you and protect you, for i know HE has a great plan for you. According to this verse "Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." :)
We are not in a good terms, i dont pick up your calls this morning, i keep my distance to you, as i decided for the peacefulness of everybody, but hey ! you teach me too many lessons in life, you help me grow and motivate me to go out of my comfort zone. and now I wish you happiness, best life and success. I hope you have a blast and happy day as another year added on your age. GOD BLESS.
Happy Birthday BOSS,
I dont forget your special day,i just chose not to greet you but i prayed for you and i allow God to pass by my prayers to Him to You.
Please be Happy,
Love, -Your Master-
Aug 25, 2018
Aug 25, 2018 at 12:04 PM UTC
Bakit nga ba tayo yung pinipili
kung hindi naman talaga tayo
yung totoong minahal?
Jul 7, 2018
Jul 7, 2018 at 10:45 AM UTC
Pitong Bilyong Tao
Saan ka ba dito?
bakit ako napunta sa taong
manloloko?
Jul 7, 2018
Jul 7, 2018 at 10:30 AM UTC
Your presence could have been the cause of me loving again the stranger who was myself.
Somebody left then you came, made me more happier than I thought. ❤
Jun 5, 2018
Jun 5, 2018 at 2:58 AM UTC