Why can’t I do anything right?
Staring at the ceiling,
lying on my bed.
I could have just worked harder,
spent more time on school,
been a better friend,
daughter,
student.
But when I think I’m not enough,
I just need to remember.
Remember where I came from.
Remember the fight I fought with myself,
every day.
Remember the tears I shed when I thought I couldn’t get out of this hole anymore.
This dark,
cold,
black,
hole.
But I was there
for myself,
all the time.
I pushed myself up
each day,
I fought.
For the person I am
today.
So, I need to remember.
Remember the girl who fought for her life,
and remind myself
to give her some rest.
Jan 3
Jan 3, 2026 at 1:12 PM UTC
Look at yourself through the mirror
then,
look in your eyes.
What do you notice?
They didn’t change, right?
Those are the same eyes that saw beauty in everything,
not only the things you think you do wrong.
Those are the same eyes that cried when you weren’t allowed to have more sweets,
not the ones who shed tears because you’re starving in order to lose more weight.
Those are the same eyes that searched for the best hiding spot,
not for a way to hide the pain away.
Those are the same eyes that loved to open when the morning called,
not the ones that dreaded waking up.
Please just look at your eyes.
And,
let them remind you.
Remind you of the little girl inside you.
You don’t want her to be hurting like this,
do you?
Jan 2
Jan 2, 2026 at 3:49 PM UTC
The girl who laughs at everything,
is always positive and looks confident.
She seems to have it all,
a great life,
perfect body,
skin like glass
and even good grades.
Her life seems perfect
with a perfect family and lots of friends.
She is smiling,
she looks happy.
She seems to have it all.
But that is not how she feels.
Not at all.
Nobody sees her pain, her struggles.
Nobody knows what she’s been through.
Nobody knows she’s tired of everything.
That she can’t even get out of bed in the morning.
That brushing her teeth ***** all her energy away.
Nobody knows she stopped eating cause her stomach felt too big.
That the first thing she does when she wakes up is stepping on the scale.
That the only thing she thinks about are numbers.
Nobody knows she spent all her money,
on skincare and make up,
only for her to be comfortable enough to leave the house,
to see people.
Nobody sees the hours she spends learning for school,
learning to the point she can’t even stand on her feet anymore,
without shaking and almost fainting.
Nobody knows how alone she sometimes feels at home.
Nobody knows how she thinks that her friends don’t like her,
that she is too much.
That everyone hates her and thinks she’s a burden.
That she feels like she needs to drink herself numb in social situations to be confident enough.
Nobody knows there was a time where she was too scared to leave her room.
Nobody knows she is slowly fading away.
That’s the girl behind her smile.
That’s the girl that she tries to hide.
Cause what if everyone sees the real her?
What if nobody likes her the way she is?
What if she doesn’t look perfect?
What does she still have left then?
Then she is just a girl.
A girl with pain.
A girl that falls apart.
So,
she puts on her mask,
her shield
and laughs.
Dec 30, 2025
Dec 30, 2025 at 11:02 AM UTC
Sometimes I just want to put everything away in a box.
Pretend like nothing really happened.
All the thoughts.
All the pain.
Everything that bothers me.
Putting it all in a box
and store it under my bed.
I try to laugh,
all the time.
I’m positive,
most of the time.
I try to put every bad feeling away.
I try not to cry.
Not to let anybody know how I really feel.
Cause when you put everything away,
it isn’t there,
right?
But I can still feel it all sitting in my body.
Lost from the sight,
But for me it can’t hide.
It makes my blood feels like it’s clumping.
Like my brain is storming inside.
Even my heart feels like it’s a rock.
Like the sharp ends stick through my skin.
It feels like I’m a ticking timebomb.
A bomb that’s going to explode.
It could be any second from now.
I’m the box.
Here’s the thing about boxes.
If they’re full,
they can’t close anymore.
Nothing fits anymore.
You need to make space,
to let new items in.
So,
One day the box explodes.
You need to face the things you keep hiding,
you must sort it out.
So,
before the bomb explodes,
open that **** box.
face the things inside it.
cry.
Scream if you need to.
Talk about all the things,
The things you keep hiding.
The things that are bothering you.
Make space
For new things
Positive things.
Being vulnerable isn’t a bad thing.
It only shows your strength inside.
Because instead of hiding from your demons,
You face them.
You fight them.
You fight for your own happiness.
You choose what the box contains.
Dec 29, 2025
Dec 29, 2025 at 3:52 PM UTC
It's hard to look back.
It’s hard to remember.
Why did I have to go through all that pain.
Why did I have to deal with things others won’t even think about at my age.
Why did I have to show courage and strength, even though I was drained.
It’s hard to look back
It’s hard to remember
How I couldn’t see a point in life anymore
How I needed to survive the day,
just for another one to start over again
It’s hard to look back
It’s hard to remember
How I fell into a hole underground.
Dark.
Cold.
Death.
Seeing everyone around you,
passing by.
When you are stuck.
It’s hard to look back to the girl I was.
It’s hard to remember the things I went through.
But that doesn’t mean I’m not grateful.
Because the things I went through are the lessons I carry with me today.
I know my weaknesses and I know my strengths.
The things most of my age haven’t figured out yet.
But that doesn’t mean,
it’s not hard to look back,
Hard to remember.
But maybe that’s the point,
To know where you don’t want to go back to
To be grateful for the things that happen to you today
To know you came out of the things you guessed you wouldn’t
So I embrace my past
Open a bottle of champagne
And toast
Toast to the girl who fought for her life
And celebrate the things she achieved
She did this for me,
so I can now live the life she always dreamed of.
Maybe we’ll never be the same again,
And maybe that’s the point.
Dec 29, 2025
Dec 29, 2025 at 1:49 PM UTC
Mirror mirror on the wall…
Who is the most beautiful of all?
Well clearly, it’s not me.
You can count all the dots on my face,
See the dark circles under my eyes.
I started counting calories like it’s a race.
Because nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.
I say to myself in the mirror.
Even though the reflection got black spots in it.
I wake up with a pain in my back and a ring in my ear.
You need to lose weight is the only thing I hear.
Still shaking on my legs,
with a stomach crying out of hunger.
It starts to sound like thunder.
You’re not hungry,
you’re just bored.
I say as I step on the scale.
The number is dropping,
so I scored.
Dec 29, 2025
Dec 29, 2025 at 10:12 AM UTC
Maybe the world is changing.
Maybe everyone around me seems meaner.
Or maybe I learned to respect myself more.
Dec 29, 2025
Dec 29, 2025 at 7:56 AM UTC