I walked to the shores,
collecting seashells and pebbles,
believing light was coming through—
or maybe just yearning for it.
I stopped when the orange of dawn felt right.
Where I stood,
the breeze danced feather-light,
colors swam softly across the sky,
and my toes curled into the sand.
My silk moved with the wind in ease,
strands of hair brushing my shoulders
like they were dancing with sunlight.
Flowers rested in my grip,
as if waiting for a surprise—
a moment that pulled a smile from me,
one I thought might finally stay.
It felt like it would whisper forever.
But then… the storm came.
The nimbuses gathered, hand in hand.
Lightning struck—fierce, sudden—
as if it knew I wasn’t ready.
My gaze fell.
The chill seeped in.
My silk no longer danced,
my flowers no longer held their grace,
my hair no longer brushed my skin
with that same soft longing.
I stood there,
staring at the same sky
that once held the dawn—
but this time,
it was darker,
and lonelier
than I had ever been.
May 15
May 15, 2026 at 7:34 AM UTC
now walk out that door
without sparing me one final gaze
for these hands that failed to read
the clues you left unsaid
I was never found in your haze
you kept singing songs with your own muse
expecting me to listen
when I could not read the notes like you do
you laid your pages before me
but never sang this melody with me
give me your pencil
while my fingers are still learning to hold
give me your portrait
while I’m still learning the shades
you look into my eyes with countless emotions
while I only know how to whisper
those eight letters to you
you stand at the edge of where I long to reach
and I remain here
learning how to be brave
these waves come rushing through
and I am still a soul
that trembles before you
once I wished I could place a ruby
inside our scenery
but it will only remain a scenery
for I failed to play the role
you painted in your mind
step away…
as you already do
I mourn the version of you that might return
yet I know
I am no longer in this story
even though it cuts with every distance
I let you leave
with the smallest resistance
for loving you
was the only language I knew
Jan 30
Jan 30, 2026 at 10:38 AM UTC
I hate that I miss you,
Knowing it won’t return you to me.
But how can I help it?
Let me whisper you into my sacred pages.
You were the soul that guided me
farther than I believed I could go.
You loosened the smile I tried so hard to hide,
painted color into a world
I thought was only black and white.
You made me feel things
I was sure were never meant for me.
You felt like the missing piece—
one I didn’t know I was searching for.
But where are you now?
Why did you drift so far away?
Did I not hold you gently enough,
or was I simply too much to hold?
You could have said anything before you left.
Anything.
I wasn’t stopping you.
I wasn’t asking you to stay.
We weren’t even lovers
for me to beg you with that right.
I don’t despise you.
But—
I hate that you appeared
at the exact moment I was drowning.
I hate that you saw the parts of me
I thought no one ever would.
I hate that you awakened feelings
I didn’t know I could survive.
I hate that you showed me
what I had always wished for—
only to leave me knowing it.
I may forget you.
But my soul will remember,
for it struggled beside me
to believe the lie
that I didn’t fall in love with you.
Dec 15, 2025
Dec 15, 2025 at 8:51 PM UTC
A place where my soul once whispered home
was where your presence used to feel.
But now…
as the days run in circles,
each time I speak to your gaze
that’s lost the light I used to see,
each time I witness your smile
that feels more like a chore you try to fulfill—
your voice still drums close to my ear,
yet it feels so far…
distance was never the reason.
Like a loop you never asked to be part of,
these cracks keep splitting deeper.
Which part of this home
didn’t feel safe enough for you?
What made you turn away from me
every chance you had?
Why did your humor fade into grey silence?
You taught me to step out into the rain
and get drenched with you.
But now it’s just me, standing here,
shivering under every drop,
watching you sit so far away
as if the path between us never existed.
Why did you stop walking this lane with me?
Why are you so quiet?
Why won’t you tell me anything?
What did I do to put you here…
or what did you choose
to put me here?
How do I hold your hand again?
How do I speak to you like I used to?
I can’t find the person I used to see.
I can’t find someone like you either…
because the truth is—
it’s not even in you anymore.
Dec 3, 2025
Dec 3, 2025 at 5:13 AM UTC
Give me one good reason
why I made you feel incomplete —
when I’ve been running miles
just to catch a glimpse of you,
while your heart wandered
to someone else…
in love with someone else.
Can’t you see?
I’ve been standing in the very place
where you last saw me —
the path you used to walk
so I could feed this quiet longing.
But you were smiling for someone else.
Your laughter… belonged to them.
I know I’m not supposed to be here,
not in a space where you shine brighter,
when I’m the one you said
dimmed your light.
But tell me…
what is this feeling
that keeps my eyes from looking away,
that stops me from searching
for different gazes?
Everything else feels empty.
You held my stories once —
spoke through me
like my soul was made for your hands.
Now nothing feels right
because it isn’t you.
But can I call you back
to fix any of this?
I can’t.
And I won’t.
Not when someone else is guiding you
to the world I failed to build.
I won’t step between
what isn’t mine anymore.
Your door…
it’s disappearing into the distance,
a place I still remember
but can no longer return to.
And the worst part is —
I’m still standing here,
hand half-raised,
still hoping you’d hear the knock
I never dared to make.
Nov 27, 2025
Nov 27, 2025 at 7:40 AM UTC
My questions, from time to time,
Never quite stop whispering your name.
I wandered too deep into your sea,
Until I remembered — who am I to swim
in an ocean that was never mine?
We were never anything, were we?
You never called me yours,
Nor did I ever call you mine.
Yet something keeps knocking at my doors
Whenever I meet your gaze,
Whenever your voice spills its melodies
Into the quiet of my days.
You give me the urge to claim
that delicate smile of yours —
and it feels so wrong.
Your heart beats for another soul,
And I will never cross that line.
So I try to take a step back —
I have to.
But why does it feel so heavy
to lift my heels,
to silence your name,
to shut you out of my world?
Maybe I’m trying to leave a place I never admitted I lived in.
Nov 19, 2025
Nov 19, 2025 at 9:23 PM UTC
For the one I’ve never tried to hide,
Who pulled and pushed my strings with ease —
Even if I lose, I fall in rhymes,
And through each tear, I’d smile for thee.
For your eyes, I could never lie,
They shine right through, unmask my soul,
They whisper my name without a sound,
Where words can’t reach, your silence told.
Your soul — it’s not a fortune found,
But something words can’t quite define,
I hold as though my palms were made,
To fit this fragile grip of thine.
If you should slip, then let me fall,
Crash to the ground, but not from you,
For if above me’s where you are,
That’s where I’ll keep my gaze fixed too.
This ride need not be you and me,
If fate drifts you to other skies,
Just don’t forget, I’m still below,
Still lifting my head to meet your eyes.
Leave me with the noise and crowds,
While I build a home for you in dreams,
To keep you safe, like stories told,
In tender tones no soul redeems.
I hope you see stars each passing night,
Before your dreams pull you away,
While I’ll be here, just picturing you,
Before my own night turns to day.
It need not be me you return to,
If warmer worlds can mend your blue,
For even through the ache and sting —
I’ll stay,
Helplessly devoted to you.
Nov 9, 2025
Nov 9, 2025 at 1:44 AM UTC
To hold you,
and tell you not to walk so far away—
to let you know,
here is where I want you to stay.
Each turn, I long to see you by my side,
yet all these words remain confined.
Your door stays closed,
while mine won’t shut from your memory.
Your heart still beats for someone else,
one that will never return.
And while you make me flutter,
I drown within your world—
your every gaze,
your every smile that tugs your lips,
your every word
speaks of how you were once mesmerized by them.
I showed you colors
to shield you from what’s gone cold,
but you only looked back,
wishing you could go home to what’s already faded.
When I open my arms and call your name,
you tell me it isn’t my warmth you waited for.
After all I’ve traced and unraveled for you,
after all the dead stars I tried to relight in your eyes,
you still yearn for what’s gone.
The words I never said
sting when I touch these trails—
you’re here,
always have been,
just far from where I wished us to belong.
No, I can’t meet your eyes anymore,
can’t hold your gaze.
For all this while,
I can’t say with certainty
that it’s truly me you’ve been seeing.
I can’t take your hand
and lead you home—
I can’t risk hearing their name once more
as you drift into a world I cannot reach,
a space I’ll never replace.
So I’ll take a step back.
For what floods my eyes—
it isn’t yours to shed.
And for lying to myself,
I’ll admit, I’m the fool.
Because the further you drift,
the more my heart still beats for you.
Nov 5, 2025
Nov 5, 2025 at 3:59 AM UTC
Under my sleeves, where melodies hide,
The ones I long to sing but fear you’d drift aside.
For I don’t hold the map to your story —
Or know if someone’s already resting by your heart’s territory.
Oh... I don’t dare let the truth unfold,
Because each time I imagine you in another’s hold,
It cuts me slow — a silent bleed within,
A wound that echoes where you’ve never been.
But look at you —
Those eyes that speak louder than any tune,
That smile of yours,
It does things to my trembling core.
And your strides —
They tell stories I’ve yet to know,
Each pace a chapter I long to borrow.
Still, let it stay this way.
I won’t name it; I might make it fade.
Don’t say a word — nor will I,
For your eyes already reply.
I’ll wait again, and yet again,
Even for a fleeting second’s grace,
Just to catch your gaze.
Nov 1, 2025
Nov 1, 2025 at 7:52 AM UTC
"I'll return before it turns dark,"
That’s what you said before you left.
But it’s long past dawn,
And I’m still here — hovered by shadows,
Waiting for you to come and shed
The tears you once laid to rest.
But it rained,
It scorched,
It flashed in rainbows —
And you never returned to watch them with me.
You made me sit alone where you left me,
When you promised to witness the sky with me.
What am I to watch
When the sky isn’t clear enough
Because you’re not here with me?
Let it soak in colors and drifting white feathers,
Everything feels somber without you near.
Sweet melodies become soft torment to my ears,
And laughter from others rings loneliness through my chest.
The sight of lovers clinging to one another
Reminds me I’m here by myself — every time.
Maybe you never wanted to walk this path with me.
Maybe your promises wore a mask beneath that delicate smile,
Because you knew I wouldn’t move
Until you uttered another word.
But this was it all along, wasn’t it?
You never meant to come back.
At least you could’ve cut through this skin,
Instead of lying —
Leaving me in dread,
Watching others still find reason to smile.
Oct 26, 2025
Oct 26, 2025 at 9:05 PM UTC