I don't think I deserve happiness , just pain and anguish .
Jul 8, 2020
Jul 8, 2020 at 6:43 PM UTC
I can't wait to get home
To get back to you
You the source of my joy
I can't wait to get home
To fully embrace you
You with your skin so smooth
I can't wait to get home
To kiss you
You with your lips so lush
I can't wait to get home
To make love to you
With your chest so full
Sep 2, 2019
Sep 2, 2019 at 1:28 PM UTC
You only want me flawed
To do what you cannot -
Accept your own mess
Love yourself to the best
It's a selfish desire
Dire wolves to be fed
I am earth, not your soul
Never plastic, I'm flesh
Unbound by blinding lights
Strong emotions, distress
Insecurities, true
But no fear I confess
My weak flesh is now new
Muscles, stronger, I said
"Bullet-proof, self-preserved
To feel nothing, I guess"
Jul 14, 2019
Jul 14, 2019 at 8:27 PM UTC
What a year what a year
Another day another tear
Nothing seems to be clear
All I know is fear
Fear of what others think of me
Fear of what I will be
Fear of what others see
My heart free of glee
May 26, 2019
May 26, 2019 at 4:22 PM UTC
My chi be telling me there will be better days
I sit down wondering if I will see another day
Do I even deserve another day?
Imagine getting ***** and clamoring for your rapists approval
Why don’t I just blow my head off like Hemingway?
Then see the old man at the end of the tunnel
I wonder what he would say
Probably tell me how I wasted all my talents
Maybe remind me of how I was a disgrace to my parents
Probably get Dante to lead me to inferno
Or would I finally find peace
My chi comes back and screams as I swallow the pill
May 16, 2019
May 16, 2019 at 12:56 PM UTC
best part about having no friends
is having no enemies either
best part of having no significant other
is being able to feel whole by yourself
best part of solitude is
solitude
best part of loneliness is...
I wouldn't know that. I never
felt lonely.
May 15, 2019
May 15, 2019 at 7:52 PM UTC
Run down the stairs of despair
A fast descent
Nothing has ever been clearer
My will and hope bent
Death the final chapter
May 15, 2019
May 15, 2019 at 6:30 PM UTC
Once an addict always an addict
Addicted to the pain
Tearing my skin
Watch me deflect emotions
Ignore my feelings
Neglect those I love
Burn my soul on the stove
Where is that pin
Watch me stab it in
Screaming, crying, laughing
Smiling and dying
May 15, 2019
May 15, 2019 at 6:25 PM UTC