F Unting Charlie Kilo

Apr 3

Arlo Disarray

(song lyrics)

i’m up so high
there’s no sky above me
i reach out my arms
i can touch the stars

and on the edge
looking down below me
i see the people
and how small we are

i’m falling down
from the ledge i’ve stood on
dropping fast
as i hit the ground

but i’ll come back
as a ghost, don’t worry
you won’t relax
i’ll make sure of that

i don’t think that i can die
i’ve tried already
but every time
i am still…
alive

i guess i’m stuck
not sure why i’m wanted
but i’m still here
i just don’t give a ****….

#music #depression #anxiety

F Unting Charlie Kilo Apr 3

"Without End.."

Word and thought exist
in their unformed state
within the Aether..
which in itself,
is without beginning
nor end..

And so it is within that union
into the Perpetual
that words and thought
are metabolized into existence..  i.e.
"Brought out into the light of day" ..
within the working  agreement
of body, mind, soul and spirit..
which in part, is of the finite..
    and in part of the eternal..

Which all,  in itself
places us in commune  with the Aether;
(and all of the spirits  within
that it contains)

And so the circle of inspiration is complete,
      but clearly..
      not only is it without beginning,

          but also..  without end.

I see the world
feel the chill
Which way to go
Windowsill
I see the words
on a rocking horse of time
I see the birds in the rain

Oh dear Dad
can you see me now
I am myself
like you somehow
I'll ride the wave
where it takes me
I'll hold the pain
Release me

Oh dear Dad
Can you see me now
I am myself
like you somehow
I'll wait up in the dark
for you to speak to me
I'm opened up

Release me
Release me
Release me

https://youtu.be/i06UL-8AMi4?si=or3J3xZsdO688YG4

for my brother Jeremy

#love #inspiration #release #eternity

F Unting Charlie Kilo Apr 1

For the "betterment" of all humankind

The new act of
burning one at the stake
now takes place
within the art of ghosting

profiles in courage

Mar 31

Jeremy Betts

~•§•~ A Recipe for Disaster ~•§•~

I'll be better here sometime right before never,
I swear
Not trying to be clever
I'm being sincere
Just can't assign a specific timeline to recover
I've tried it,
Found it only helped set up the next failure
The one that's already lurking around each and every corner
I stand defiant, against my own self preservation order,
Almost daring it to leap from the darkness a couple corners sooner
I'm not trying to be negative either
Life is an iffy endeavor
But I don't not get it,
I can see it from the view of the average observer
It's gotta look like a recipe for disaster
But it's better than what I see in the mirror
Something I won't need a memory to remember
Branding me with this, scared flesh on each wrist,
A gut wrenching reminder
The kind that can only linger forever
Stalking me from the edge of what I'll be able to remember
But it'll get better...
...they swear

©2024

#never #swear #sincere #clever #downer #recovery #tried #blunder #failure #defiant

F Unting Charlie Kilo Mar 31

I think you..

...finally understand now that I never will be far. :)

When you spin off into your self-downer mode,
I have to pull away. Over the years, I have told
you over and over again that they are old messages..
so unfairly placed into you a long time ago by  others
    who in no way are you.
When you repeat those horrendously-dismembering
messages, I have to temporarily go silent..

so not to keep harping on you to stop  that
dead-end-street kind of ****.
At one time it horribly formed and defined you.

You are no longer that same horribly beat down person.
    You just at times think you are.
I am in love with that brain of yours.

I struggle
with the part of it
that still believes its ok
to think that way.

It is not ok to think that way, young Love.. not anymore.
You will struggle with the thoughts wanting to surface
and take control..        how could you not?
They were plunged deeply into you
with such a horrible and contempt-filled violence.
It will continue to take time for the hard-wiring  in you
to become slowly unkinked..   But love does that.

   You already know that also. xoxo

Ok.. so you tend to be a couple of people at once
I've got an answer for that too.. 👀

https://youtu.be/xMaUebHdGUQ?si=8vTqc18HTOx8i9Pw

:)

Mar 31

Arlo Disarray

taste me

i want
to be
touched
in
a
way
that sends
little
vibrations
down
my
spine

remind
me
again
that
i’m alive

bite into me
like
a piece
of
fruit

taste me

let my
flavor
dribble
down your
chin
and tell me
how
sweet i am

lick
my
lips
to
moisten
them

send me
to the moon

make me see stars

make me
forget
just
for
a moment
that my
sad
little
world
is on fire

i’ll
show you
what’s inside
if you
promise
not to
hide
or cry
or run
or fight

i want
to be
seen
for what
i truly
am
in the light

let your
eyes
set me
free
and we’ll
see
things
together
in a new way
for
the
first time

His reply poem:

I want to see you too

I want you to see
How I see you
To taste your face
And your drippings too
To slide between
Your layers
Lubricate your dreams
Birth them
Into reality

Painstakingly
Remove
Your shattered
Bone fragments
And boil them
To a broth
To heal our
Ailments

Fill your voids
Before you are
Destroyed
By the deep
Longing
To join the
Non-living

Dive
Headfirst
Into your deep
Lacerations
Make them
Rejuvenated
With *******
Murmurations
While embraced
In amplexus
Complex
Proliferation
Of a life only
Dreamed of

Let me
Scoop out
Your tired eyes
Live in a cloud
And do crimes
And rain down
From warm skies
To melt the
Icy confines
Of a past
That doesn't
Make sense

To move into
A future
Where
things
Make even
Less sense
But feel
Like
Real
If only
For a minute

#*** #desire

Mar 27

M Vogel

on glory.. and a sin, unto death

Sorry, about....

how much  I
completely come--   a l l
              over myself;
the ceiling,  the window-blinds..

the neighbor's cat..
walking across the street

every single night, my love.
(true story)

I'm pretty sure god saw me ******* the cat

#awake #alive #judged #bad #badbadbad #badbad