regrettable regret

                          cemented with regret.

empty threats,
heaving with regret,
heart is vehemently set,
yet my mind seeks reset.


expectations left unmet
tossed the dices, a bet
i am forever in debt
prophecies set

                          cemented with regret.

Looping and looping
A single day-dream
She’s trapped in between
The light where she cried

She eats the same cereal
Every single morning
Not a single morning
Since the day she died

I keep on walking
Staggering on the roads
I keep on the go
Leaving her behind

She likes the same bands
She wears the same clothes
The same thing she loathes
Since the day she died

This age is temporary
Changes every month
Another status done
Another band new sight

Stuck in a phase of life
She can’t advance at all
Stuck at a single fall
Since the day she died.

i feel like a tiger
pacing in a cage
it is not poetic
in the way that
if the bars were opened
i would burst out
like a firecracker
it is instead in the way that
i would lie down where i stood
unable to leave.

home ; i ought wish from

comfort slums the fallow feet

means of revival

travel

Running in place is all I seem to be doing.

Wanting growth is hard when you don't have the means,
but the will is so strong.

So strong is all these people ever say
wanting to brake you down with expression
coupled with envy.

My walls cave in
the pressure seems to crush me completely imploding my body into matter.

What's the matter now?
What's next
Im waiting.

Waiting for the light to shrine through
to carry me up
to somewhere new.

O with what heavy heart
And steaded blissfulness
Doth I burdened start
Dodge the dreaded crinkles.
My soul is aching,
Much to my chagrin
As she stands there alone,
Sullenly basking.
How I Wish to be freed
From this forsaken place
Allowed to wander by steed
At a vagabond's thorough pace.
Yearn for adventure
I shall
Through the bitter years that follow,
For I myself a lady
Stall not the humble morrow.

Why can't I just wake up there?
Why must I wake up here?
Too young to stay,
Too broke to leave,
Feels like all I can do is bleed
My bitter disdain for this place.
It's here that I slept in my car
Hours after becoming homeless.
Here that I was dejected
By soughtless dreams.
Here that I suffered a miser's
Misfortune,
Having lost my family.

Then again,
I found love here.
In a place so vile
She somehow made me smile.

Maybe things aren't so bad,
Maybe I'm just spoiled.
Regardless of what I want
Yours truly most toil.
That way one day
I can embroil myself up north
And stop soiling my clothes
In this lemonade sunbelt
Of a South.

Where is everyone off to in a hurry..?
Why am I still waiting..?