And I wish I could live in that world of pastels
Where the dark isn’t as frightening
And the light isn’t as harsh
Where everything is mellow
Drenched in sunlight’s yellow

I wish I could live in a world made of clouds
Where edges aren’t sharp
And curves are forgiving
Where everything is a soft hue
With mountains made of blue

And I wish I could live in that world of light
Where shadows aren’t as dark
And beams are the opposite of hard
Where happiness is bright
A prism made from white

anger should be expressed
not held up in your body
that only creates a huge mess

but the only thing i think of
when i see those red words
is the time when the tv
had to be so loud
it would drown out the screams
of my parents voices,
yelling at each other

that was my safe place
a maxed out volume on a tv
on a paisley print couch
watching a 90s show

now the only safe place i seem to find
is the one where my headphones blare in my mind
or when i’m at a concert
second row, or barrier crowd
the bass so loud,
all those red words
they seem to disappear

there’s days i can’t have that
and those days i explode
those days are the days i’ve been coded
*disassociated