hit me while you look
at me with those doe eyes
strike me on my mouth
where i spew lies saying i don’t like you
cease my heresy and burn me
for speaking against the truth

I hate you
When you smiled, I smiled
I wanted you to be happy

I hate you
When you were successful, I cheered
I always believed in you

I hate you
When you're dressed up, I gasp 
I am taken by you yet again

I hate you
When you grew, I admired
I knew you were meant for more

I hate you
When you moved on, I stayed
I am always waiting for you

I hate you
When you faded away, I cried
I will only be a memory to you

I hate you
When you were in my life, I knew
I truly did love you 

I hate you
Despite everything, I begged 
That I could actually hate you

The sun shines brightest and most fair, when storm clouds fade from darkest hue.I drown beneath life’s heavy weight, where whispers pierce like daggers true.

Shadows haunt the road I walk, scorched by tears of bitter fate. Sinking deeper ’neath the weight, reaching for a hand—ere it be too late.

Around the twisting path there stood, a figure brooding, dark yet still. An outstretched hand he offered me —as if to bend the fated will.

Alas, I shunned the offered hand —for faith in man was long since spilled. My broken trust, like glass beneath, compelled my soul to flee, not yield.

Oh, but gentle and kind was he, for patiently he stood, Imploring me to take the offered hand —with all the grace he could.

I reached a trembling hand to his, my gaze a silent, pleading cry,
Searching deep within his eyes —
to will him lead, or let me die.

He gently folded hand 'round mine,
and raised me from where I had been,
To walk beside me, step for step,
through shadows of this valley dim.

Though he showed no trace of fear,
with every step we took,
We found a solace deep and still,
no words could ever brook.

my hands burn with the sting of nettle
my mouth, dry and tasting of metal
his lips, scented with chapstick and chocolate
overpower it, taking authority over my
mouth, his eyes establish an orbit
around me, and my life

I wish to adore you forever,
like a never-ending tale,
investing emotionally with each other,
being ingenious and avowing,
creating a stronger bond,
making you feel celestial and truly loved,
never fading away from each other,
like there’s no last resort,
until we pass away,
wishing for the same.

But this yearning is unfulfilled,
leaving me in consternation from the struggles I battle,
philosophizing, if this desire can become true,
handling being constantly misunderstood and bullied,
like a train coming to a dead end,
Praying for my deepest dreams to become a reality,
like a man who knows happiness exists in some form or another, even if it seems invisible to our own eyes.

If I am not rage, then what am I?

I tried love, trust, patience, empathy

They were accepted out of courtesy

But discarded like an inconvenience

If I am not anger, then what am I?

I tried so very hard, so much time

Just to receive little effort and no time

Just to be abandoned and misled

If I am not anger, nor am I rage itself

Then I am the pain you gave to me