I was bound in chains I could not see,
A prisoner to my own misery.
Whispers of doubt, a crushing weight,
The silent scream of a hopeless state.

I stood in shadows, cold and alone,
With nothing but silence to call my home.
My mind a battlefield, a ceaseless fight,
As day bled into dark, and dark into night.

The mirror showed me a ghost of despair,
A hollow stare with nothing to share.
No light within me, no fire to guide,
Just a wandering soul, nowhere to hide.

Pain was my blanket, fear my friend,
I asked if this was how it would end.
Would I be forever lost, unseen, unheard?
Would my heart stay numb, unfeeling, disturbed?

But even in the darkest of nights,
A flicker of hope would break through the fight.
A whisper, a question, a faint trace of will,
That begged me to rise, to fight, to feel.

"Why?" I asked, when surrender felt near,
"Why should I break, when life’s still here?"
A question so simple, but it tore me apart,
And from the ashes, a spark would start.

With trembling hands and a heart full of fear,
I clung to the light, though it seemed unclear.
Each day I crawled, one step at a time,
Climbing through chaos, through pain so prime.

The days grew longer, the nights more bright,
I learned to trust in the inner fight.
The pain was still there, but I held it tight,
A piece of my past, but not my light.

And now I stand, not unscathed, but free,
A warrior forged from the struggle to be.
I’ve learned that the flame never dies,
It flickers, it falters, but it still flies.

I know now that darkness can’t hold me forever,
That the questions are answers that guide us together.
From the depths of despair, I’ve come to believe,
That no matter the fall, I’ll always rise to achieve.

So I spread my wings, no longer bound,
In the light of my journey, I’ve finally found
That the power within, though tested and torn,
Is a fire that burns, and will never be mourned.

From ashes, I rise, no crown, no name,
Forged in fire, untamed by shame.
Each fall, a step, each scar, a light,
In darkness, I carve my endless fight.

I seek no praise, no fleeting fame,
I burn within, I am my flame.
Not for the weak, nor for the crowd—
I rise alone, unbroken, proud.

The world may tremble, the storm may roar,
But I will stand, forever more.
For strength is born from deepest pain,
And through the loss, I’ll rise again.

I lost, I broke, I burned to the ground,
Yet from my ashes, my crown unbound.
Through fire and fury, I carved my way,
Not for the world, but for the price I’d pay.

With sharpened mind and heart untamed,
I faced the void and felt no shame.
I reach for heights no soul has known,
Not for praise, but to claim my throne.

Where meaning blooms through love and pain,
Where every scar is gold to gain.
I’ll fall again—that truth I own,
But in each fall, my strength has grown.

I rise for me, for kin, for fire,
To light the path and take it higher.
Not for envy, nor for fame,
But for love, for will, for the name.

So let them watch, let them see,
What man can be when truly free,
When fire transforms to endless light,
When loss becomes the fuel for might.

Golden I rise, no crown I need,
The gold within is all I’ll heed.
I build, I climb, I break the chain—
For in my soul, the gold remains.

I came from silence, storms inside,
Where shadows spoke and tears would hide.
A boy made iron, flame, and thread,
I stitched my soul where others bled.

I asked the void, “Who am I now?”
No echo came—I made the vow:
To shape my mind, to sharpen steel,
To climb with scars and learn to feel.

I do not beg the stars to shine,
I build my path. The light is mine.
With every fall, I stand and grin—
Each bruise, a door I kick within.

They said, “You’re too much fire, too loud.”
But gold is never meant for crowds.
I chose the pain, the edge, the weight—
For that is where I forge my fate.

I am the man who breaks the wall,
Who walks through loss and loves the fall.
Let life strike hard—I strike it back
With vision fierce and heart intact.

I want the things they say can’t be—
The dreams too vast for eyes to see.
Not just for me, but those I love,
To lift them high, to rise above.

But I will rest, and breathe, and laugh,
And dance on broken aftermath.
For peace is part of power’s flame,
And joy is not a softer game.

I need no crown to know I won—
For I am whole when day is done.
The mirror holds my only prize:
A soul of gold, with fire in eyes.

And when I lose, I lose like kings—
Preparing for far greater things.
My failure’s just my victory’s lap,
A thunderclap before the snap.

And when I win, I build anew,
For others’ hands to climb it too.
Not envy, not control, nor pride—
But love, the storm I hold inside.

So mark these words and hold them tight:
I live for truth, I burn for light.
My name won’t fade, it multiplies—
For I am gold.

Golden, I rise.

To My Love,

We survived.

Through the storms, through the silence, through the ache of not being understood
we are still here. Not perfect, not untouched, but held. By something greater than both of us.

We searched for freedom, both in our own ways, and we didn’t know it then, but the search was the meaning. In that longing, we found God. And in God, we found that we were already whole.

The devil tried to break me. Tried to convince me that pain was my portion. But he didn’t see the strength of the Spirit living in me. Or the quiet, stubborn hope that still lives in you.

We pour into each other, even when we feel empty. And somehow God fills us back up.

We still hope for one another. And that hope? That’s love. That’s grace. That’s us.

I believe in who we’re becoming, not by force, not by fixing but by remembering who we already are in Him.

Oh— to be a Pothos vine
Crawling towards the light
Always takes her precious time
Makes every room so bright!
Oh— to be a golden green
With marbled fronds so lush
She, the thriving Houseplant Queen
Makes other flora blush!
But, lo— beneath her heavenly form
Her truest magic resides
For through the winter and the storm
She’s balanced as the tides
Oh— to have that perfect Pothos Power
Flourishing through the night
Oh— to grow and never to cower
No matter how daunting the fight
For it’s her courage that we envy,
Her fortitude that we fear
Her resilient leafy frenzy
That will suddenly appear
Even when you think she’s dead and gone
The stars will still align
A tiny sprout will bloom at dawn  
The mighty Pothos vine!

"Will I make it?"
the heart cries.

A thousand tries,
yet I fall.

"Should I lower my expectations?"
it whispers.

"No, it's not over until you win,"
the mind insists,
like night cradles the sky;
light will come soon.

i don't have
the time

(don't have
the time)

for this
internal
fight.

i say i've
got hope

but i let
it take over
me tonight.

what a tragic
mess,

a cacophony
of internal
sounds

spinning from a
broken record

filled to the
brim with
regrets.

if this isn't
a test,

my strength is
enduring,

and i will
make the best
of this.

i said i was
lost,

but my soul is
unwavering

and
because of you
by my side,

life is a little
easier

to manage
and survive

and that's
enough for
now.

Here on this ledge
where many come to sit
in solitude, or with company
they leave behind pieces of their grief,
fragments of their love, seeds of their hope
stopping to take a breath
swallowing their words
for a minute of silence

and every time, I plant these things
with the little dandelions,
that make you sneeze
so there's something to blame
for the red eyes

because nothing blooms here
without carrying
someone's story
for you to read, for you to feel.

waking up in a haze,
wondering what day it is.

nights blurring into the next,
trying to pull myself together.

lost, confused, wondering:
what the hell is wrong with me?

is this just a phase?
is this post-traumatic response
or recovery?

because everything seems
to go too fast, or
way too slow,

and i think
i'm gonna breakdown.

stupid toxic tendencies,
i keep trying every day,
and it's oh-so exhausting.

imagine an enemy,
only you can see—

man vs. self,
back to the basics
of healing and discovery.

fighting the bad thoughts,
just to get another day.

so tired and over it,
i gotta claw my way out,

or i'll never truly be set free.