I am in the depths of who knows where.
It is dark, it is cold, it is despair.
I am face up in the pool gasping for air.
I see no stars, I see no moon
There's just the fear that I may go under soon
The void which is darker than the walls,
tempts me to give into its calls.
I hear them echoing in my soul,
then my burdens take their toll.
I reach out in the cold air,
for a helping hand that isn't there.
Then I go under,
to the darkness of my eternal slumber.

I woke up again
And had a day
To me I lent
I have to stay
Lonely repent
It isn't mine
My head so tangled
All the time
Can never figure out
When to shout
Where's the time I spent
It left and never came back
Live for nothing
Over and over
Pretend it's something
Can't access myself
The interface too complex
Next
Next
Next
Next

Twenty one thousand, nine hundred and fifteen days,
the sum of all my experience, all memory and dream.
Days of smiles and of laughter, scattered as they came,
interspersed with pain so deep my soul still hears the scream.

Accumulated time filled with things of the important everyday,
Through shifting hands of time all things came then hurried on.
By heart or minds good reasons were the choices that I made,
until now where no good remains and all sense of hope is gone.

My mind will sometimes force a replay of some echo of the past,
when hope and love gave purpose to a young man's dreams.
Twenty one thousand nine hundred and sixteen days,
more recent but so much later,
with a soul deafened to all but screams.

A flow, a pen, an ink stained palm.
A life, a story, all gone wrong.
A spark of hope in the night, maybe?
No, your hope is grammatically incorrect.

"This is where your sentence could have ended
but it didn't," see?
Nonetheless, it wants so desperately to end.
An incomplete thought, a fragment -
A fragmented existence with an expired due date.

Can you pick up the forlorn pieces?
Use your calloused fingers to avoid getting cut.
You continued the sentence,
But you used the semicolon wrong.

The hero dies at the end of this story
We all know how it goes
The same old song goes on and on
So strap in and raise your chins
Its a scene we already know
The hero dies at the end of the story
And were left wondering
What even was the point of it all?

I miss you
Not just in the physical sense
In every sense of the word

Your unique way of doing things, its like watching a symphony of noise
You're either in complete harmony with it
Or consistently fighting against it

Your laugh
Oh your laugh
It fills my whole body with warmth
A sound I crave to hear

The smell of the top of your head, comforts me
Like a mothers embrace, I know I am safe

Day to day living never felt less mundane
Always helping wherever we felt we could
Exploring, guiding each other
Always finding refuge in one another

Life is not the same without you
Never will be without you
The emptiness, at times consumes me
Swallowing me whole
The crator you've left within me
Can only be filled by you

I hope
I have to hope