once I was a waning crescent, pale and thin—incomplete
a silver sliver of light peeking unwanted in between the
folds of the velvet, midnight sky

and now, having gazed at my sun from a world away, I
am whole—I am full and complete—grand designs,
imperfections, craters—making me no less whole

when you are near it is not you that completes me,
but rather you who illuminates the parts of me I
thought were lost forever

the paradox that you both do and do not complete me
brings me as much comfort as the sun’s warm rays
on my cheeks and the moon’s cool gaze on my back.

A weapon that’s finely honed—
not more than a wire, a knife.
Nowhere on Earth I belonged,
until you invaded my life.

Around me, your arms wrap with comfort;
warmth spreading; hold’s steady, no effort.

Throughout, all’s familiar, safe.
My self (for what I always longed)—
no longer a weapon, a knife—
a man, fully, finally owned.

What am I doing?
What's going on right now?

My Emotions: You wouldn't know, you haven't been listening to us or even conscious of the grand scheme

You've been too busy,  
spoke my pain
You've been absent minded,
spoke my soul
You've been detached
spoke my spirit

You've been distant
spoke my heart

Blindsided by the truth I've constinuosly allowed to accumulate, I open up again

To myself

Only she has the tools to fix me
Only she has the capacity to piece me back together and love me deeper than I could fathom

I don't know why we look for that "special someone" to do it for us

It goes back histories ago, you’ve heard the stories.
Humans, born as a giant beast, uneventfully split as punishment.
That split soul became the humans we are now, two halves separate.
The story goes, life after life, their kind would search endlessly for the other half.
Destined to never unite, destined to feel incomplete for all eternity.

Our soul doomed to search endlessly until the end of time, but I know fate is in our favor, benign

If I can’t be with the rest of my sole, then I’d rather be left a hole

Their love is more than adequate, it’s a feeling that never quits

I thought I found you some time ago, but it was a selfish soul with an ego

I guess I’ll continue my search, I don’t think I can survive much longer without your perch

Thought I found you again later in my journey, but I was just a slave to a sick wretched tourney

I use to look up to the stars at night, ponder, are you too thinking of holding me tight?

No matter how much time it’s been, I will feel the same for you as I did then

It’s the way our spirit makes me feel, full enough I don’t ever need another meal

Our spiritual bond will not be forgot, we are intertwined together as a knot

I will never again let this curse leave me detain, I fight with love, not distain

Until finally, through my search I found you, without using any of my senses, I knew. you did too

I know you’ll never leave us again, our journey together has just began

I know our pain may hurt, but we’ll always rise stronger no matter how hard we hit the dirt

I’m more than jovial our souls were united, life was so hard while we were divided

I felt what you felt when we were apart, we knew something was wrong from the start

Those happy days I felt so much pain, I could feel you fighting just to keep sane

The things we’d do to one another, it would leave blood covered on each other

I searched for you my whole life, if I’m lucky enough one day I’ll call you my wife

No matter the weather, nor life as rough as leather, or as dark as the nether, as long as we are together our soul will not tether

Life, as we understand it, could just be another one of our fickle imaginations
Every day is a new fantasy
We are running around in circles concentric;
Making us feel vulnerable and asking ourselves whether we are eccentric
With each passing experience, we make the circles grow bigger,
But are we growing, who's to know?
Maybe we are and who's to blame us,
After all, life is all about trying to be a better part of our selves
At the core of these circles, we lie and we never try to forget
Who we were during the part of the whole process.

Even if we did figure it all out, who we were supposed to be;
Never fearing about the fall-out and remembering our need to be free,
Even if we did stutter to make the best of it,
Did we ever try to feel like a complete part of it?

Who are you chasing?
Is it a part of you that you left behind or just another one of your own created versions?
At the centre of it all, we're still the same person
Who we were and we never tried to escape it, all we did was just reshape it.

We're running in tails of who we wanted to be
Never realizing how much we want to be the one we were supposed to be
But who are we supposed to be?
What's the cost of happiness we ask,
Is it drowning into your problems or giving life a way to seep through you?

Every tangent is different, every experience will take you away from your circle,
to make you feel something more
But that might not be the only way to grow, but it surely will be the right one
They say 'go with the flow' without ever telling the real truth,
Go with the flow as long as you don't crash and burn.

Chaos is everywhere, within you and without you
In chaos there's meaning, there's truth
It's inevitable but so are you
Each chaos is your tangent, maybe the aftermath is not the complete you,
It won't matter though as long as you take the exit
And get back to where you were before.

At the end when the dust settles, you're still your self
Your version who thought he was better than your previous self,
It was harmonious knowing what you know now
Even if you found yourself and how,
Knowing you'll never go back to being the same person you were,
before life consumed you and you became the paranoia that only you know.

You are still the centre of your creations,
Raking chaos in your way of finding a meaning.
Trying not to lose yourself along the way,
Before you fade away.