They play tricks
to enslave me,
and seize me
by their vanity

I pray that God
will save me,
release me
from humanity

©

Darling it took 2 years and 3 months
We've reached a complacency, where love's embers faded,
Your presence a ghost in our desolate charade.
There are no words, through empty glances we sway around eachother but never towards.
It's been a while where passion's colors grayed,
In echoes of silence, my heart yearned to speak,
But no more.
I'm held captive by routine
My soul's silent plea
In this stagnant realm of marriage
Longing to be free
I crave the warmth of a sun that once shone bright,
Yet in this dim cocoon, we faltered, lost the light.
My heart, a garden left untended,
Love's petals withered, desires suspended
No hopes to flourish

But do you see me when I'm burning out
When I'm darkened by the shadows cast
And the world drags me down
Do you love me
When I'm full of red hot rage
And hatred licks my heels
As I try not to let it climb up to my chest
Do you hear me when I bite my tongue
And let absence speak
Do you see me
Through their words
Do you see the lies they fling around
Do your eyes recognize the truth
Do your ears hear both sides
Tell me
Does your heart know mine?

God left
And the silence is a trembling hush
This was not the peace I asked for
But He doesn't reply
There's a quiet in my heart
It's too quiet
Like a meadow turned graveyard
A fatal abscess
Worship became a map I could not read
And God
Well he was in my heart
And he's still in me somewhere
I carry him
Like the taste of prayer
Which hangs off my tongue like passion fruit
I desire to suffocate my longing for temporary things
I want to starve how human I've become
Busy in the clicking, sleeping in the day
French painting my nails highlighting all ten useless moons
Forgive me Lord
I have misplaced my hunger for heaven
Forgive me my Lord
I remember you taught us that hunger was a gift that sweetens the meal
I have starved myself of your angels
And I'm wanting to break my fast
Let me plummet but not drown
Let me propel and soar but not be breathless
Let me worship
And God please find me
Catch my prayers and let me feel like I've been found again
Show me I was wrong to leave but You never did

I remember a yesterday when I sobbed to be with you
Wept and begged to go home with you
For the universe to never let us part
Today it's the same eyes
That wet my cheeks
Because being with you hurts
So much it spills out without my lashes squeezing together

He drifts away
Consumed by new skies
As she lays in bed where boredom lies
Weighing her worth against the empty space
Mind wondering back to when they last embraced
The flame that burned with passion's light,
Now dwindles low, obscured in endless night
Her dreams deferred
Waiting up, her hope begins to fade
In solitude, she finds her heart betrayed
As days march on and change does not show
She wonders if there's any more room to grow
Doubt lingers, heavy on her soul
Reality seeps in and it takes its toll
Sacrifices seem one sided
Together forever becomes undecided
They say patience is golden
Until it all becomes a burden
How long will she live in this trance
How long before she gives herself a new chance?