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Cynthia Jul 2023
In the depths of shadows, where anguish finds its abode,
A soul awakens, bereft of will to traverse the road.
Born without hope, a vessel crafted in perpetual gloom,
No ember within, no fervor to consume.

Why inhale life's breath if no joy therein resides?
A marionette, a puppet, in apathy's tides.
No purpose, no direction to ardently pursue,
In silence, dwells an unwavering heartache, oh so true.

Yet within this obscurity, where sorrow claims its throne,
A glimmer emerges, as if from dreams far-flung and sown.
A will to endure, to brave affliction's cruel sting,
To tread a path where hope may gradually spring.

The echoes of a smile, long faded from view,
Reside deep within a heart that lingers and seeks what's true.
Through tears, each day is valiantly fought with faltering might,
To unearth a reason, a glimmer of resplendent light.

A solemn dance, to master the weight we bear,
Navigating a world so desolate and unfair.
Though fragile, strength arises from the abyss,
A tender blossom in sorrow's relentless abyss.

For even in the absence of fervent desire's reign,
A flicker persists, refusing to wane.
In every act of resilience, however minute,
Lies the semblance of purpose, albeit undefined and acute.

So let us weep for dreams that falter and fall astray,
And mourn the joy that withers, little by little, day by day.
But know, dear soul, that even amidst despair's chilling breath,
A will to endure, to rise, to strive, defies the grip of death.

Though born without an innate yearning to persist,
The heart can adapt, coexist, in adversity's midst.
In time, perchance, a purpose shall gracefully unfold,
Breathing renewed life into a weary soul, once untold.
Cynthia May 2023
She hides her bruises, conceals her pain
From a man who once was loving, now insane
He drinks and hits and tears her apart
Leaves her broken and with a shattered heart

But then she finds solace in a friend
Who treats her kindly, makes her heart mend
He listens and cares, never raises his hand
And she begins to feel safe again

She tries to resist, to stay loyal and true
But her husband's abuse is all she knew
And so she falls for his friend's gentle touch
A forbidden love, but one that meant so much

They meet in secret, their passion ignites
A flame that burns bright, but never quite right
For she knows deep down what she's done is wrong
But she can't help but feel that she finally belongs

She leaves her husband, with a heavy heart
And begins a new life, a brand new start
With the man who treated her with such care
And finally finds the love that's always been there

But even as she looks back with regret
She knows she couldn't have lived with that man's threat
And she'll never forget the friend who saved her life
The one who showed her what love was like.
Cynthia Apr 2023
For a moment I was happy
For a moment I was married
For a moment I had will to live
For a moment I felt like a Queen.
And in only just a moment
I lost everything
  Nov 2022 Cynthia
Splashes of Surreal
Fear is the relief of
Being lost in the woods
When the canopy shines
Before the night arrives

Fear is the relief of
Being greeted by the sea
Welcomed by the breeze
As the storm subsides

When I lie awake at stark midnight
At night, I find relief
In the darkest reliefs of the mind
Where fear is a friend of the dark
Cynthia Jul 2022
My heart did not belong to you.
It was not yours to take.
As a married woman, abused or not,
I was loyal.
Like a dog.
Collared and fed,
but kicked and left outside...
all while he would play with other puppies at the pound.
You touched me once,
and we both should've been with others.
Once is all it took for me to realize
I'm human.
I am sad, and broken, and healing.
I'm human.
My heart was not Yours to take,
and though you haven't claimed it
I'm glad You are the one that stole it.
Whether it be for a gorgeous, burning moment of desire,
or the rest of our lives.
I'm glad You are the one that holds it.
Because I am human.
I can change who I am loyal to.
I chose you,
whether it be for a gorgeous burning moment of desire,
or the rest of our lives.
Cynthia Jul 2022
God I knew I should've left.
I shouldn't have even held your gaze.
You have stupid and ugly beautiful blue eyes.
I shouldn't have
I just shouldn't.
Shouldn't have gone to the bar,
Shouldn't have wiped that one tear from your face.
Shouldn't have accepted your comfort.
I shouldn't have fallen for you.
EVERYTHING was done right.
I kept it simple and friendly,
no dancing in the rain.
No laughing in the night.
It took one night on vulnerability to break down my walls.
I'm trying so hard to rebuild them,
I don't want to be close to you.
I don't want to be close to you or anyone else.
Every time I build my walls,
I put in the effort for it.
Each brick I cement into place...
Do you think it's easy for me to push you away?
It's not.
None of this is easy for me and yet here you are,
flicking bricks away from my walls as if they were paper.
Cynthia Jul 2022
Your eyes are glazed and cold
and I can tell you need to cry.
Silent tears stain your soul
but you'll never tell me why.
Standing in front of your warm smile,
I see with more than just my eyes.
No one around us seems to notice
the brokenness you hide.
The world took something beautiful
and tortured it's fragile soul.
You've become a crucible
for toxicity to behold.
Just once, I have a favor to ask.
Lay your head against my chest,
and let go of your mask.
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