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Herb May 2019
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
He drank too much whisky
And drank too much beer
So it finally caught up and he passed out I fear

Humpty Dumpty died when he fell
Humpty Dumpty broke his eggshell
His egg white poured out
And so did his yolk
The townspeople cried as they watched Humpty croak

Humpty Dumpty led a good life
Humpty Dumpty had a shrewd wife
When she heard the news
She called for the law
She wanted his goods, and she wanted them all

Humpty Dumpty became quite rich
Humpty Dumpty carved his own niche
He made wise decisions
His portfolio was fat
He made lots of money by inventing the hat

Humpty Dumpty had a good name
Humpty Dumpty never lacked fame
He had a big house
With servants and varlets
He'd hang out in Vegas with Hollywood starlets

BUT....

Humpty had a shameful condition
He put himself in that position
He frequented people
With questionable talents
And contracted a disease which effected his balance

NOW....

Humpty Dumpty lies in his grave
Humpty Dumpty can no longer shave
He's drawn his last breath
It's the end of the show
And his wife has run off with a young tennis pro
bxtch  Mar 2014
Humpty Dumpty
bxtch Mar 2014
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall;
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Didn't want to put Humpty together again.

Humpty Dumpty why so pale?
Is it because you're such a fail?
Humpty Dumpty what is that?
Is that a **** or are you just fat?

Humpty Dumpty your lips are so red!
Is it because your baby is dead?
Oh, Humpty Dumpty you make me laugh
Because your body looks like a full grown calf.

Humpty Dumpty what is your gender?
You look like a boy and a girl mixed in a blender.
Humpty Dumpty you're such a *****!
You're not even close to being rich.

Humpty Dumpty next time you fall,
Please don't ever forget to call.
Humpty Dumpty I'll be there in behalf
of everyone to laugh!
To my dear teacher,

*******
President Snow Oct 2016
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty stares at the fairest of them all
Her eyes that as deep as a cliff
Her face that made him stiff

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
He made a quick call
Humpty Dumpty heard her amazing voice
He also heard his different heart's noise

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
He took a glimpse at the fairest of them all
Her eyes that is shining while dancing with her prince
Humpty Dumpty was no prince, he was just a boy, an ordinary and not a masterpiece

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
He never thought he'll get a great fall
A fall that made his world stop from spinning
A fall that made his heart stop from beating

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
And yes! He had a great fall
All of the kings horses and all of the king's men
Couldn't put his heart back together again

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Staring at the fairest of them all
Waiting for her to come back, hoping that she had the glue
Because Humpty Dumpty gave his heart to the girl who made him blue......
Schuy  Dec 2016
Humpty Dumpty
Schuy Dec 2016
In the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme
Humpty is you and Humpty is me
Until I've made my point clear,
The air will be society
Now in this particular tale,
Mr. Dumpty starts by sitting on a wall
That is where we are
Looking down, not wanting to fall
But the air pushed and shoved
Until Humpty wasn't scared of the drop
So he let the air push him just a little bit more
Then Mr. Dumpty went tumbling from the top
Humpty wasn't ready for death
But by now it was far too late
All of the horses and all of the men
Couldn't accept that this was fate
They tried to patch him up
But their efforts were to no avail
No matter what they did
Everything ended up a fail
It seems that we're done with the Dumpty rhyme
In which Humpty was you and Humpty was me
And I think that I've made my point quite clear,
That evil is often disguised as society
Dorothy A Jul 2010
Humpty Dumpty
was never steady
on his legs
Almost round as a ball
he was a fat, little egg

One day he was struck by the beauty
of a seductive fork
So silvery, shiny, and slim
she desired to whisk him into shape
to make him completely fit and trim

But Humpty Dumpty, in love,
was falling way too hard
I mean he literally fell
in his crazy crush
cracking his delicate shell!

His mother, the hen
was beside herself
"Come to your senses", she begged
"Stay away from that wicked fork
before you become scrambled eggs!"

Humpty Dumpty was fading fast,
fearful that he was mortally wounded
Oozing some white and yolk and
suddenly he was feeling
the pain of being broken!

But the doctor refused
to hand him over to the chef
Patched him up though it was hard.
"Another fall like that", he warned
"And you will end up in shards!"

So Humpty Dumpty was
never ever the same
Everyone was taken aback
They all knew to keep their distance
for Humpty Dumpty was cracked!
Nat Lipstadt Jun 2013
Weather Advisory: A long one*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Be not fooled,
by the evening-tide,
be not deceived
by the quietude,
tis not a reprieve
of day before dark.

Be guarded,
for the easy transformation,
a tranquil shedding
of the day's husk,
into the faded light of dusk,
just one of nature's machinations
to delay the inevitable.

Evening-tide,
a colored compilation
of a few mischievous hours,
when sunlight is invaded by
streaks of pink, azure and gold,    
just before the
palette is plunged
into a stainless steel can
of gothic black,
skyied glory rendered into
common house paint.

Evening-tide,
an alleged easy calm
surfeits some souls,
supposed easy passage from  
the day's contusions to
a relaxation from humankind's regulations and rules,
but not for me.

Evening-tide,
when appetites unsated, simmer,
the in between hours when
humans transform themselves,
from day laborers to creatures
desiring, aroused, hungry  
for night time pleasures,
searching with false courage for
boundary lines to sever.

Evening-tide,
it was at evening-tide that
David espied, desired and
stole Bathsheba for his own,
with a King's arrogance
rent a kingdom,
murdered for profit,
birthed an Heir,
a prince, who wrote,
by evening-tide:

I have seen all the works
that are done under the sun; and,
behold, all is vanity
and vexation of spirit.


Evening-tide,
fear closes my throat,
confusion reappears,
a low grade flu infects
deemed persistent, incurable,
revisits, medicine resistant,
my insights, my speech,
to blind and bind  

Am I Gloucester,
blinded, but faculties
possessing vision,
the future to clarify?

No, no, it is to a king,
Lear,
to whom I am
son and cousin,
kith and kin

Sunset visions of
ultimate demise
ours eyes behold,
but plainly put,
at Evening-tide,
our dementia -
a precursor,
a periodic but hostile guest
in the hostel of our memories,
cracks and fractures us,
spirit first, body second.  

We are bound helpless
by a knotted tongue,
slow dying malingerer,
inside a head of ill repute,
unable to locate our knowing,
and every word selected,
a battle galactic, oft lost

Evening-tide,
I am cold,
and the issued command
is bring an umbrella
to warm and cover.  
What an old fool am I,
tis not blanket or a
Bathsheba I seek,
but at Evening-tide,
Babel's nefarious treasury of words
unlocked, for tis closed,                    
the gatekeepers,
drunk and absent,
drunk on absinthe,
and creme de mentia
and I have no key

Evening-tide, prithee,
I beg of thee,
consideration please,
check this hideous amusement,
that makes this
King's speech confused,
odor of smokeless cordite ignited
where the synapses have burnt,
injured, beyond repair
injured, by mine own aging.  

Reverse the diagnosis
of the panel of wordsmiths:
Alas, weep and be comforted...

Evening-tide,
a reverie of colored tears,
downward sloping,
arrive to tingle my tongue,
warming comfort for an *****
willing but unable,
a wounded soldier,
a veteran of poetry,
now prone and pained
beyond repair,
beyond healing,
immunized to the
heat and solder,
drugs and salves,
that heretofore
might have closed
the cracks of rack and ruin

Evening-tide,
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and
all the king's men couldn't
put Humpty together again^

Evening-tide,
my hair, the color of old age.
Irony, my skin yet smooth,
unwrinkled, not in need of the
toxins that are employed
to fill crevasses on
the outer banks of age of comedy

Alas, the toxins natural from within
have seeped from their
latent resting place and have
contaminated the groundwater
that lubricated my mind,  
from siege engines poured,
a contamination of
mine own making.  
After a life long battle,
my Jericho walls have fallen.

Lear and I faint recall the love
of our beloved Cordelia,
but try as we might
her name escapes our grasp,
******* by bite of aging's asp.

We grow drunk by night
on a drink not of choice,
unhappy fury,
the residue within
the imprisoned poison
of our polluted tears,
that come only after our
misspoken and misshapen
guttural croaks
of our Eveningtide prayers
are both
unintelligible and unrequited
Written 6/01/11, after seeing Derek Jacobi as King Lear. This poem is about my fears of dementia which people close to me suffer from, sadly.  Now, I struggle to recall names and places. Poetry, not so much because I get to pick and choose words at my own speed. But someday, who knows....the time between day and night, is a metaphor for a beautiful slow, slipping away but
be not deceived
by the quietude,
tis not a reprieve
of day before dark.


^ this rhyme, purportedly a child's view of siege engines that could not break the walled of the City of Gloucester (how ironic!)  in 1643

An abbreviated version of this poem goes like this:
Nat went to see King Lear,
Then went down to the beach
To watch the sun set, the evening arrive,
They both reminded him, of his fear
That someday he'll probably sunset like Lear
And end the play, the eve, mad, his mind deceived,
De-worded, defanged, his poetry retired, but not relieved
Tommy K  Sep 2013
Witchy Poo
Tommy K Sep 2013
Witchy Poo

Mary had a little lamb
She made chops out of it,
Ate it 'till she was sick
Her ******* felt like ****.
So she went to the Wicked Witch
To solve her ******* drama,
With a wand up her ****
Like a banana in a farmer.
With a poke and a shove
The witch knows the soul is hers,
But it's the only way
That this sickness can be cured.
There was a sinister bump
A noise was close by,
The witch looked through the window
Humpty Dumpty was outside.
Witchy Poo got angry
And cursed the dumb egg,
That one day she will get him
And that he will crash down dead.
So Humpty ran off
And told The Kings Guards,
Witchy Poo is in trouble
She's a fugitive at large.
Hiding in the mountains
Hearing Humptys cries,
Sitting on the wall
Blabblering Witchy Poos crime.
So she came down from the mountain
As quietly as she can be,
Sneaked up behind him
Climbing a tree.
Then she pushed Humpty off
From the high wall,
He hit the ground
And splattered on the floor.
Climbing down from the tree
The witch ran away,
Hiding in the caves
Doing her wicked ways.
While looking through the mountains
A guard spots some loose weeds,
Chopped them out of the way
And his eyes trickled with greed.
There was a hidden door
And he opened it up,
Looked inside
And he thought, what a grub.
He saw the witch
Snoring so loud,
His sinister grin
Was making him proud.
The guard thought to himself
Saying, the ***** will get it today,
I'm going to be rich
On a nice pay day.
So the guard told The King
The place where the witch hides out,
Squealing to the pigs
While eating with their snouts.
The King ordered a search
For this menace to the crown,
Wanted: Alive
So she can be burnt down.
The search party went out
And found the witch,
The guards came back with some casualties
And in shackles, the menacing *****.
Then The King announced to his kingdom
That the witch will be sentenced to death,
Then she was thrown into the dungeon
Waiting for the end of this mess.
Torturing the witch
In cruel and horrible ways,
Telling her she is going to suffer
So she better pray.
As the days goes on
Then The King set a date,
Proclaiming
"She's gonna be burnt on August 28th"
There was a shout of joy
As everyone was happy,
Except for the witch
Locked up, feeling ******.
Rats at her feet
Chewing off her toes,
Cockroaches all around her
Cursing all her foes.
Starving and weak
Hanging from a chain,
Screaming to The King
To go and grow a brain.
Weeks have now passed
It is now the date,
That the witch will now die
Burning is her fate.
So they unchain her
She is so weak and tired,
Dragged her out of the dungeon
Her brain is all wired.
As they bring her out of the door
The sun hits her face,
Blinded by the light
Coming out at a slow pace.
With no toes on her feet
Stumbling and pushed around,
Rocks are being thrown at the witch
By everyone in town.
Tied the witch to a stake
Wood and hay underneath,
The witch is getting taunted
Yelling insults at the beast.
The King watches on
And raises his hand high,
Then drops it suddenly
Meaning it was time for her to die.
The Kings Men got their torches
And started the fire,
Witchy Poo started screaming
It smelt of burnt tires.
Burning and scorching
The witch is now a charcoal corpse,
Then everybody was celebrating
And their minds warps.
As they drink lots of wine
The Kingdom is now safe,
From the evil Witchy Poo
Who messed up this place.
Singing songs of praise
About how Witchy Poo died,
Here how it goes
And the story aint lies.

Humpty Dumpty
Sat on the wall,
The Witch pushed him off
And he splatted on the floor.
The peasants were yelling insults
The Kings Men had the fire,
Burnt The Witch at the stake
Because she was evil and a liar.

And that was how Humpty really died
And how Witchy Poo got fried.

Tommy K
(2013)
Nat Lipstadt Jun 2014
written two years ago and a bit, but suits still....

Weather Advisory: A long poem pouring ahead

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Be not fooled,
by the evening-tide,
be not deceived
by the quietude,
tis not a reprieve
of day before dark.

Be guarded,
for the easy transformation,
a tranquil shedding
of the day's husk,
into the faded light of dusk,
just one of nature's machinations
to delay the inevitable.

Evening-tide,
a colored compilation
of a few mischievous hours,
when sunlight is invaded by
streaks of pink, azure and gold,    
just before the
palette is plunged
into a stainless steel can
of gothic black,
skyied glory rendered into
common house paint.

Evening-tide,
an alleged easy calm
surfeits some souls,
supposed easy passage from  
the day's contusions to
a relaxation from humankind's regulations and rules,
but not for me.

Evening-tide,
when appetites unsated, simmer,
the in between hours when
humans transform themselves,
from day laborers to creatures
desiring, aroused, hungry  
for night time pleasures,
searching with false courage for
boundary lines to sever.

Evening-tide,
it was at evening-tide that
David espied, desired and
stole Bathsheba for his own,
with a King's arrogance
rent a kingdom,
murdered for profit,
birthed an Heir,
a prince, who wrote,
by evening-tide:

I have seen all the works
that are done under the sun; and,
behold, all is vanity
and vexation of spirit.

Evening-tide,
fear closes my throat,
confusion reappears,
a low grade flu infects
deemed persistent, incurable,
revisits, medicine resistant,
my insights, my speech,
to blind and bind  

Am I Gloucester,
blinded, but faculties
possessing vision,
the future to clarify?

No, no, it is to a king,
Lear,
to whom I am
son and cousin,
kith and kin

Sunset visions of
ultimate demise
ours eyes behold,
but plainly put,
at Evening-tide,
our dementia -
a precursor,
a periodic but hostile guest
in the hostel of our memories,
cracks and fractures us,
spirit first, body second.  

We are bound helpless
by a knotted tongue,
slow dying malingerer,
inside a head of ill repute,
unable to locate our knowing,
and every word selected,
a battle galactic, oft lost

Evening-tide,
I am cold,
and the issued command
is bring an umbrella
to warm and cover.  
What an old fool am I,
tis not blanket or a
Bathsheba I seek,
but at Evening-tide,
Babel's nefarious treasury of words
unlocked, for tis closed,                    
the gatekeepers,
drunk and absent,
drunk on absinthe,
and creme de mentia
and I have no key

Evening-tide, prithee,
I beg of thee,
consideration please,
check this hideous amusement,
that makes this
King's speech confused,
odor of smokeless cordite ignited
where the synapses have burnt,
injured, beyond repair
injured, by mine own aging.  

Reverse the diagnosis
of the panel of wordsmiths:
Alas, weep and be comforted...

Evening-tide,
a reverie of colored tears,
downward sloping,
arrive to tingle my tongue,
warming comfort for an *****
willing but unable,
a wounded soldier,
a veteran of poetry,
now prone and pained
beyond repair,
beyond healing,
immunized to the
heat and solder,
drugs and salves,
that heretofore
might have closed
the cracks of rack and ruin

Evening-tide,
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and
all the king's men couldn't
put Humpty together again^

Evening-tide,
my hair, the color of old age.
Irony, my skin yet smooth,
unwrinkled, not in need of the
toxins that are employed
to fill crevasses on
the outer banks of age of comedy

Alas, the toxins natural from within
have seeped from their
latent resting place and have
contaminated the groundwater
that lubricated my mind,  
from siege engines poured,
a contamination of
mine own making.  
After a life long battle,
my Jericho walls have fallen.

Lear and I faint recall the love
of our beloved Cordelia,
but try as we might
her name escapes our grasp,
******* by bite of aging's asp.

We grow drunk by night
on a drink not of choice,
unhappy fury,
the residue within
the imprisoned poison
of our polluted tears,
that come only after our
misspoken and misshapen
guttural croaks
of our Eveningtide prayers
are both
unintelligible and unrequited
Written 6/01/11, after seeing Derek Jacobi as King Lear. This poem is about my fears of dementia which people close to me suffer from, sadly.  Now, I struggle to recall names and places. Poetry, not so much because I get to pick and choose words at my own speed. But someday, who knows....the time between day and night, is a metaphor for a beautiful slow, slipping away but be not deceived, by the quietude, tis not a reprieveof day before dark.

^ this rhyme, purportedly a child's view of siege engines that could not break the walled of the City of Gloucester (how ironic!)  in 1643

An abbreviated version of this poem goes like this:
Nat went to see King Lear,
Then went down to the beach
To watch the sun set, the evening arrive,
They both reminded him, of his fear
That someday he'll probably sunset like Lear
And end the play, the eve, mad, his mind deceived,
De-worded, defanged, his poetry retired, but not relieved
Em  Mar 2021
Humpty Dumpty
Em Mar 2021
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty thought he was clever and all
So bit by bit he stacked his bricks
And built it two hundred feet tall

Swinging his legs
And nodding his head
He looked down from the top
At small puckered wells
And small tuckered hills
Of the villagers all around him

And so time flew by
And his wall grew high
And higher
And higher
And in the heathens
As he touched the heavens
He cried, “Look up, for I am God!”

And so he went

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the king’s horses
And all the king’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty
Back together again

But children,
Don’t be sad

But children,
Don’t be sorry

For that night the men swung their picks
And the women scraped off the concrete
And the children stole the bricks
One by little one
Till all that was left to his memory
Was the flat crown of the ground

Besides, the bricks weren’t really his, anyways
Kent Delos Reyes Jun 2018
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty pity you all
The horizon is red, the river is blood
Cracks open up the great crimson sod.

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty chuckles seeing them crawl
There are no king's horses and no king's men
Just Humpty Dumpty laughing in his big quiet den.
The Black Beast Sep 2015
Humpty Dumpty was a prince
Living in his town of Gold
And here lies the hidden truth
Of the tale, left untold

Every day he'd take a walk
Strolling 'round his father's town
He wanted to be a great king
And know the folk who honored his crown

A poor young maiden walked with him
She made him laugh and fueled his smile
He wanted her, she wanted gold
Her secret, hidden all the while

His father passed away one day
Drowned within the royal pool
When all the riches were passed down
'Twas then she made Humpty a fool

She took it all and ran away
And as she took the Western track
Humpty sat on the grand town wall
Wishing she would soon turn back

'Twas love that broke poor Humpty Dumpty
As he sat upon that wall
None of the kingdom could possibly help
And thats the truth, hidden from all

— The End —