When everyday feels like this.
I cant imagine living the rest of my life.
Fighting this hard just to survive.

If this is the rest of my life.

I wish I didn't exist.

I wish I could be erased from the hearts of those who love me.
That I could never have to deal with trauma that is my mind.
That the people I so dearly love wouldn't be affect by my lack of time.

The gravity of this feeling in my body,
Outweighs the guilt I feel for thinking it.
The desire to just be nothing, courses through my bones.

If this is the rest of my life.
I have three reasons to stay.
Three people who love me, and wouldn't have their life any other way.
But if this is the rest of my life.

I will always struggle.
I will always be fighting, every day.
I will always be exhausted.
By the time I wake up in the morning.

If this is the rest of my life.
I will always wish the younger me was strong enough to act.
I'll wish I made the decision before I had my three reasons,
For the rest of my life.