I throw my covers back
Place my feet upon the floor
Get my bearings of just where I'm at
Head for the bathroom door

I brush away the night
From my hair, my eyes, my teeth
I look back in the mirror with delight
There you go...now I recognize me

My closets filled with plaids and stripes
What's this Wednesday...then plaid it is
There's a lump in the bed I think it's my wife
Either or, I give the lump a kiss

Down the stairs straight for the door
But not before I grab my shades
Same as yesterday and the day before
We all know practice perfection makes

At my desk for one long eight hour yawn
Can't remember even taking a break
My boss stops by to ask what's going on
I tell the truth which might have been a mistake

Back at home I walk through the front
Keys in hand I reach for the light
Last thought I have as I again kiss the lump
Is tomorrow plaids or stripes