who put the brakes on
who paused the healing process
paused it to make a quick cuppa
cuppa was never made

shoved in the back of my mind
it’s all piling in
crammed in every crevice
out of my eyes, it spills

that’s an improvement i guess
although i just see it as a loss
control spilling out
whatever is left, i don’t want

how long til my only desire changes
to become tiny and hide away
it’s getting old now
but it’s the only thought that stays