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Dec 2019
My heart breaks for all of the kids with addict parents. For the small kids who don’t understand why they’re always staying at Grandma & Grandpa’s, and aunts and uncles, and friends of friends, and why mom and dad are hardly around.
For the 1st grade school children who just got bullied for the first time because their clothes aren’t always kept and their hair not always brushed.
For the fifth graders who are exposed to addiction and the cruelty of it way too early.
To the pre-teens who never have extra money for the football and the basketball games, to the ones who are finally understanding why their parents are the way that they are. To the hopelessness in the pit of your stomachs... Crying yourself to sleep because you aren’t sure how to help, because you aren’t sure of anything...
To the 15 year old who is so jealous that everyone else around you has a mom..and yours is missing.
To the 16 year old who just dropped out of school to make a life of your own.
To the 17 year old who works 40 hours a week and continues going to class to try and provide a life for yourself and your younger siblings...
To the 18 year olds with holes in their heart, looking back on their childhood and making vows that if you ever have kids of your own...you’ll give them the world, you’ll show them all the love that you lacked.
To the 20+ year olds who beat on bedroom doors and spend nights searching for them when they’re on a ******...begging them to get help, you feel so useless. So used. You want to help them, they say they’re clean now. But you don’t get your hopes up anymore...it never lasts long.
To the 30 year olds who haven’t spoken to their parents in years, because they decided that the heartache of loving an addict was truly too much bare...
My heart breaks for each and every single one of you. I’m sorry, that you feel you were robbed, that you were unloved, that you got the shortest end of the stick, but I hope in all of the ways it breaks your heart — it makes you grow. It makes you strong, and it makes you, you.
And in the end, when you make a life of your own, when you succeed, when you accomplish, when you become extraordinary, wonderful, brilliant...you can be proud, because nobody can take credit for who you are, you became absolutely ******* sensational all on your own.

And dear parents, no matter how many years it has been, we hope you know, if you ever get clean, we’ll be waiting to welcome you home. It’s never too late to change your life, even if it’s too late for you to change ours.
Kimmy
Written by
Kimmy  34/F
(34/F)   
65
 
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