I'd like to be haunted so I'm never alone
I talk to my demons because no one is home.
I look in the mirror and I want to break it
Because I see my body, and fuck, I hate it.
When I was a child, I'd dream of my future
But the heat death is coming, so what does it matter?
The pictures on the walls show a pretty little lie,
Because little me was smiling but she still wanted to die.
I'm friends with my depression because it's not gonna leave me
Anxiety is my companion because it's only here when I'm breathing.
I'm tired okay? I need a damn break
Because I can't cry anymore
And shit, I feel fake.
Little Susy had it worse and she's a thriving mom now.
But I can't seem to cope, if you know, tell me how.
Why does my chest seize up when I'm alone
When the silence fills the room
Why does my brain feel the need to talk amidst the hush,
And I pray my husband is home soon.
Because being alone with myself is terrifying
With all the shit in my head.
Because when I'm alone, it's easier to hear
My brain say I'd be better dead.