And it's difficult to remember something as the very name of Eisenhower Or flowerbaskets And tired movies made of silicone and Aftersex Or sixteen candles echoing out of an imaginary suite with cigarettes at every table And green lawns Barbershop conversation The reflection of the sun in special trees Or my best friend Jesus Christ Or the smell of the theater that one day with the cynics who just got back from a tennis match and barbwire still laced delicately around their thoughts and Nihilism And automotives And priestess Jane or Henry's gloomy doppelganger who reads alternative magazines and loves the aesthetics behind broken glass And fine tuned musical instruments
It's difficult to remember Lonesome Fridays smoking on a park bench trying to finish the puzzle Or synagogues you've never been in Or insurance Or newspaper articles detailing the misadventures of Mr. City (Of course of course! Take your shoes off at the door and make yourself at home) We're tossing all our sewage into the ocean that's far from clean as it LOOKS anymore these days That's anything And everything except for the glowing mountains seen faded and wintry behind Apartments and the "Glorious Mexican House of Spices" Never been in there either
It's difficult to remember Times of Mr Twin Sister Or Joan Jett in the hallway In a highschool who's psychology classrooms have become a time capsule in the ground/ Or the gentle skinny ****** Wearing Broadway makeup and Kafka tattooed on his shoulder I like his hat He looks at me suspiciously Or the guy who is yelling his order at the counter when it's quiet here anyways Or the mariner who has a hobby of the saxophone Or 1970s ******* Or the sheepskin bikeseat fad that's yet to come but I'm predicting it now! Or two dollars and twentyseven cents at the beginning of Allen Ginsberg's America "I've given you all and now I'm nothing"
It's difficult to remember The Oriental Sacramento flies Midnight Moon Quarter to four "The Immortalization Commission" Remodelled hotels downtown Where mandalas on the floor became a Tiger lily luminous And the kimono is yesterday's painting/ Dearest Darling When I was feeling down! A staircase in reverse (??) The sound a kiss makes It's difficult to remember Colleen's earrings Or Washington State Or air conditioners in Bali The Indian ocean's daybreak hymn To Seminyak Or whatever happened to Steve from the Airplane out of Taiwan On 3 days awake Hello Kitty nursing stations ****** (Kubrick's version) Cardboard taking up half my bedroom It's difficult to remember until I jot it down and then its a sudden forever Sunshine Superman in a cafe spontaneous drawings with someone I just met who has some ******* attitude/ Who hops fences and has feral ideas People! En Masse! Te Amo! You're all in wolven liberty And vague postulators And holy prostitutes for the dollar Sad eyed intellectuals With undergarments made of breakfast cereal/ Seaferry poetry is different from Trestle in August poetry Or henna handshakes Or the Napoleonic era Sweet Cherry Pie The tulip's tongue Garabajal Cloudy first day of July Was hotter yesterday But not too hot
It's difficult to remember Antiquity The pale horse Studebaker outside the clinic With a glossy red trim and **** I wish that was my ride Andy Warhol's exploding plastic inevitable Nearsightedness Angels and their ability to shower with a a snap of their fingers Distant harp music Better him than me Bananas almost ripe Green aquatic Reclusive junkies Palomo's appliances Questions for the next time How much I like what you like and how I like that you like what I like Ahh that's not my bus I'm trying to get to the city! That one quote Socrates is known for about knowing nothing as true wisdom Supermarkets being built on top of liquor stores burned down a while back Monopolies Tragedies "No Love Lost" THE HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL Your guess is as good as mine Never tried to eat Asian food in Asia It was all pasta and good cider that tasted like pineapple Rain hitting the window and I'm Drowsy again God Save The Trees! Curly hair looks good on boys Torn up blinds Queer as a three dollar bill If Bill costs 3 dollars I'm sure he's caught something better safe than sorry Sage advice I'm the very model of a modern major general Golden yen and international currency Incense in the bedroom and how good it smells There's my bus! Applying for a better job than the one I got now But that's how it always is right? Chasing satisfaction 1007 apt Porch ornaments Unique names Unique style le style The extra charge on foreign ATMs Cordoroy polo shirts Flooding in New York! When someone's face screams ******* "Slippery when wet" Dine N Dash Grass gone yellow Confidence in dyed hair and capes as long as wedding gowns But less expensive Doors that always seem to be locked and I'm wondering 20 year later what's behind them? Albino animals White thoughts as clouds or Abstractions Weathers nicer in Florida but who cares Festivities this early in the day Automatopeia Do sad orphanages still exist? Just like the movies Midnight in mirrors That sick puppet at the shoe shop used To know how to really hammer it down And now he's weak and forgotten Never heard the words of a true prophet only Oceania Or the private temple near Apollo Bay Like Japanese gardens behind that gate Will I ever see it Make a proud example outta ya misbehavior Form without function Exhausted spiritualism *** Kettle Black negative photographs of dark rooms And there's laughing coming from SOMEWHERE Essays on kleptomania Had a bad dream I became a cliche Surrounded by other freaks and there was a lovely ***** I fell in love with her We married in Oregon by the sea her name was rosy ***** rosy Check your mailbox for nails And what you don't wanna hear/ If you were a vegetable you'd be organic! Empire Satirical bubble gum Satori Linda Lovelace and her special party trick That's someone's fantasy Diamond in the rough Mister guy with two black eyes frequents the adult playhouse Hes fully stocked on fishnet leggings He's too proud to put them on himself but Has nobody else around Boo hoo Swigs back the whiskey and trips down the stairs getting a third black eye in the process Marion came by with her dog the other day Wanted her box of clothes back but he loved to sniff them to remember her But she wouldn't have it
"Honey I'm going to call the police!"
"Ah they don't give a **** they have bigger things to worry about"
"Yeah you got that right shrimp **** enjoy my unwashed *******"
And she never came back again He started losing the vertebrae in his spine 1 by 1 and you know where this is going I won't say he was a poor man because he had it all coming to him the ******* But he coulda had a better start if you ask me.
It's difficult to remember And even more difficult to forget After the fact
Seagull opera Giganticism Portrait of the artist as a young man Losing one's pencil when the best idea of your life drops down from heaven and into your sorry head Signs graffitied to have funnier meanings Cruelty Impassive The Loyal Lioness And Bangladesh has too many kitchens And not enough dishes When I was young I used to say Island as "is-land" Which is true it is land But the Europeans probably stole it from somebody else anyways/ I left my future behind And objects in the mirror are closer than they appear Im no illusionist I'm terrified of the cracken Father feels the same way about Hotels Why bother/ This has been going on and on for a while are you tired yet Is your patience being tested Mine isn't because this wasn't an all-at-once kind of rambling It's extremely important to laugh at least Once a day Otherwise you'll find yourself a politician In no time at all Rockefeller ( ) Quaint home to die in I think Trains create great music Float on Sink into yourself Roses in a crooked alley That's people Busy busy busy busy Let's describe a situationist I'm not a fan of bright colors on clothes Your best shade is blue Bricklayers transcription of Don Quixote to a skyscraper Rocket thyme & Garden Erratic children's Insomnia The doorbell repeatedly Vancouver riots/ I saw that live on the news! Pictionary with the surrealists N Dada TV set MC Escher Antenna You're in the Twilight Zone now Dear Ramona I'm trying to make it up to you With a brightness only seen when you're ready to see it so please for the love of God don't blame me when it's not appearing The tapestry hidden Keep your blankets clean And avoid hospitals unless you're fine with fishbowls & the halogen The water gestapo Storage lockers full of unacted plays and Antique microwaves Emitting the nostalgia of the cold war era And what a waste of time that was / Walter Wanderleys presence in Autumn universities The opening of Vivre sa Vie Salvador Dali's pluvial taxi Lightbulb epiphanies Aquariums and their protestors Zebras in the shade Two wrongs dont make a right Elizabethan theater Saloon shootouts in a fever dream I lost and bled out all over the rustic wooden floor A maiden reached out for me and El Paso did play I woke up and pretended nothing happened/ Funerals for bad People who did bad things My first memory of a cat beneath the mattress Hello Dolly! Auditory learning Psychotherapy Lillian the landlady lost her ladle and labeled little Lyle as a lair The Black panther movement Reading symposium some years ago and Making note that Phaedo was still my favorite dialogue/ Zen Buddhism Xoxo xoxo The day Gypsies were replaced with Surface ****** appetite And not the real thing Newspaper clippings Hypnotism when all other options are out Mystical visions of sidewalks And the love of your life stepping through a door you've never seen Maybe Yes No I Don't Know Creature comforts Che Guevara's problem is that his beard made him too easy to recognize (Also that little hat!) Chinese cough medicine didn't work For long I still wheeze sometimes Domestic violence thru the wall Ceiling fan probably doesn't even work! Dimpled laughter Yankee Hotel Foxtrot In skytrains to Commercial Bermuda in her mind And courtesy in her voice I'm no Arthur Rimbaud But you already knew that Alcazar of Seville Filling up the shipbottle Here's your paradise Now relinquish it as it is False! Hare Krishna Nowhere Fast El Diablo and the Portofino loaf left rotting on the countertop Latin children speak of the sacred viper You'll hear of it after this but we'll never see what the ******* meant Heads alternating round the social current Of my lively city There's a dog soaking up the rain And songs are made in honor of Recent catastrophes Trials are dealt Cards cast to the gutter New York quiets down for the news of another war You scratch my back I'll scratch yours Skeleton key Ballad of the last wailing zoo THE ATRIUM Complexity in simplicity That's how Brainard got me! Elderly overcoats Hiding purest LSD Is a fan of Hawaiian T shirts And a communist What if I was a Freemason Or owned a tanning salon Faint crimson What did Marv look like again? "You're surrounded by people who love you" Coffee when one needs it GOODBYE BLUE MONDAY Tattoos on the wandering man Oriental chimes and the people who own them Bus stop regulars Vines overtaking power lines The hypnogogic state Strawberry light softening The mind Sister Ray LOUDLY PROCLAIMING doitdoitdoitdoit Passing the graffiti n Pluto neon Halal wide awake another Saturday Where's the Karaoke Flashing by here Those who find comfort in a bridal scavenger hunt Or expensive beer And here comes the hooded clown Clamoring about his favorite Loudspeaker Telling me my time is soon and the noise Drowns out the drowsy bliss After hour spirits the perfect time for Writing and trying to read distant Chinese Indecision on the tip of the tongue "NOW WHO IS THAT KNOCKING ON THE CHAMBER DOOR? COULD IT BE THE POLICE?"
I'm completely off the topic And into Apartment lobby photosets Low battery phone calls Confessions Nauseated reverb Trying to see the attachment people got with bingo halls And moving companies Ah no luck again Eve is at it with her showtunes Halfway methodology Triage Paisley headbands left Distraught on the quivering Heater Dwindling sunsets We're truly disciples of the moon spirit which grants us more energy (This is according to a drunk I met one night) Or ***** old men When the horizon is engulfed with A winking cinder Suitcase at the door Last time First time Magician never reveals his fetishes (They all have to do with bags under your eyes) Employment office dramas of my friend the one who blinded a social worker And the one who blamed Islam And the one whos philosophy entirely consisted of Spooky Action at a DISTANCE Parisian riots Queer youth Didn't make the team! Jester 'cross the hall who's beard suggests Ishmeal n car battery n expired vegetables n rain which crosses the line n ***** cranberry n Poorly fitted suits n Harsh pigment n incense shops n Bocca secret towns With churches more beautiful than any you'd find in your own city n the cultural market Xylophone ear to ear Soul cleansing starting at only $89 (with a 6 month guarantee) Sophie's birthday and her picnic at Victory Park The nearby bums trying to sell tea mugs and Loose wires beside gated convenience stores I'm an Island away attempting a poem And never bought a scratch n win Or heard the same song more than seven times in a row or been in a column Or escaped the washhouse Invested in a birdcage for next year Been to a palm reading Visited Oasis Smoked salmon Told anyone else about Montana Screamed the things I'd like to scream ** Word of the day Or kissed a lunatic or swallowed the corpse of yesterday I keep her on my neck until I'm too anxious to let go Counting streetlights Jeans worn in and faded to be sent off to A lonely caffeine addict Christmas Eve I'll be reading a postcard from San Francisco Asking the same questions My imagination is made of a different material than last week Now it's the same color as your hair HEY that's a good pickup line to use in the heart of the Canadian Embassy Drinking discarded music resembling a sweater you may have said YES to if it wasn't so unsure of itself And now Mr. Acker Bilk ascends thru the window of an August home Like a lazy hornet I'm still lost without identification Or a nice belt As happens when one uses a quality item too casually How did uphill suddenly seem so downhill? I'll claim a waterfall For SALE that inevitable Indonesia Greyhound O another greyhound O another greyhound I'm fretting too much about not enough Delayed the Airport and the yellow question
????
II
What if I knew how to read the curb? Or translate drunken droll What if I was never tired again and could REALLY do anything I set my mind to? What if I was the first cigarette that cured cancer instead of caused it? What if I could end superstition And walk underneath any ladder I wanted? What if I could make it with a young Audrey Hepburn!? What if I stopped pretending to be a microphone and got on with "it" What if the grocery store closed later And I opened earlier? What if parking lots werent so sad All the time? What if gravity simply had enough of exotic birds and specifics? What if we stopped trying to recreate what is truly lost? What if foreign children embraced Wasting time instead of Midnight starry bicycles And the antics of a monk Disguised as a romantic?
There are those that worship God And those who worship the Sun And those who worship nothing at all But I suppose on the last bus We're all the same exhausted Voice who can't wait for next pay day What is an empty bank? Or authenticity What is there to prove anymore? I hope I don't die tonight and regret Being impulsive for once You're a smart shadow And a dull character Pushing the last of the daisies Get the lamp to turn on again Give the pavement something to look forward to with your walk Be consistent in being inconsistent If there's a word there's a ***** and a poem for it! We all oughta worship Nothing at all except Clarity Compassion with ones neighbor who either forgot the pay the electricity bill or couldn't afford to We're a swimmin