Tonight I vow to forget your name
And drown your memory
In whiskey.
Tonight I vow to forget the way
Your lips tasted with
A pack of cigarettes.
Tonight I vow to forget your hands
And numb my own
With the cold.
Tonight I vow to forget you
For real this time
Like you forgot me.

Hello old friend
I'd missed you so.
I didn't know you'd be back so soon.
I wish you'd written me
I could've prepared.
But here we are
Reunited once again.
I'm speechless.
You were never supposed to come back.
Sometimes that made me happy
But then I remembered.
I remembered all those times you were here
Even though no one else was.
And I missed that.
Can you believe it?
I missed you.
That little hand on my back.
Whispering in my ear.
Welcome back.
Welcome back to that hand
To the voice in my ear
The ever present.
Welcome back.
Welcome back depression.
I can't believe I missed you.

You have stars behind each eyelid,
And galaxies in your bones.
You are my world,
My whole solar system;
My north, my south, my east, and west
My rising sun and my nightly rest.
I orbit you,
Forever trapped in your gravitational pull.

I have loved you for many years,
Even before I knew your name.
Your heart has called to mine for eons,
Whispering sweet nothings in my ears.

I have searched for you for lifetimes,
And been disappointed at every turn.
For no one I've met in any life
Has ever been half as sublime.

Now I've lost myself in you,
My gypsy heart has found its home.
You're the north star I've been drawn to,
There's no one else I want to pursue.

That man, he's got eyes that shine,
Like the ocean in the morning time.
He comes and goes
Just like the waves,
And as he goes
He calls my name.
That man, He's deeper than the sea
And from the depths he calls to me.
He's got highs and lows
Just like the tide,
Yet through his lows
He won't say goodbye.
That man, he leaves a wake behind,
And like the sea he churns and grinds.
He's both the calm and the storm.
Always changing,
He's cold and warm
But his cold, never estranging.

I love your lips when,
They are still wet with the taste of mine;
My dear I love your skin,
When you and I are intertwined.

I love your bright eyes,
Full of passionate fire.
And the way you light up my skies
At your simplest desire.

A tender love is not for me.
I do not want chocolate or flowers.
I need my own dead sea,
Who can keep me afloat for hours.

I love you and your fiery heart.
My dear, when can our eternity start?

There's an infestation in my head
Like a zombie I'm walking dead
I'm running on empty
There's nothing left in me
Except the smoke in my lungs
Climbing my ribs like ladder rungs
How come everyone's better off than me
Why wasn't I made to feel pure ecstasy
Is the wiring a little ******* up in my head
Is that the reason I'm always seeing red
Or am I just crazy
With my mind running free
Dragging its feet
Down every dark street
Where it knows it shouldn't be
But God does it hate me
So I'm like a chicken without its head
Running and running til I fall over dead
But this path is scary
And I can't see
They won't even give me a spark
Cause the truth comes out in the dark
We struggle forever with the falsity
That we're better off with conformity
But if we're all the same in the head
Maybe, just maybe, we're better off dead

Even with 218 miles between us,
I still feel your lips on mine
And your hand
On the small of my back.
Your whisper travels highways
To flutter softly in my ears
And I can see your eyes twinkle,
The two brightest stars in my sky.
Even with 218 miles between us
I still feel your heart beat,
In perfect time with mine.

I've never felt such freedom
As walking barefoot down the lane
Letting my lungs fill with lightning
And my heart the smell of rain
My footsteps echo with the thunder
My hands tangle with the sky
Yes I know the storm is coming
And my dear it is I

I used to have a heart
But the streets stole it
I'm no longer a poet
Just drugged with a pen
Hitting rock bottom time and again
Its hard out here
So I grab another beer
And drink my pain away
Til a sunnier day,
If it ever comes
Til then the drugs will numb
Me and my bad decisions
And all my artistic visions
Til I'm no longer a poet
Just drugged with a pen

No I’m not ok. Can’t you see I’ve never been that way? There’s something inside me that never fails, to break me down to cries and wails. I can’t find a fix. I can’t find a cure. I’m stuck with this sickness. Stuck for sure. Where’s the antidote to my disease? Help me find it. Help me please? My life is swirling down the drain. Help with my life. With my pain. I tried to stand strong but I’ve been breaking all along. Who are you to try and understand? Who are you to take my hand? Say its all fine. Tell me it’ll be better down the line? Where’s the antidote to my disease? Help me find it. Help me please? My disease won’t go. Its here to last. Someone help me and help me fast. Help me please? Cure my disease? I’ve gotta stand up nice and tall. Work through the pain through it all. But I fall to pieces every time. It’s not just me on the line. This killing sickness, this draining disease. Keeps me swinging on a high trapeze. I know it’s soon when I’m gonna fall. I don’t know at all. Who I’m supposed to be. To get rid of what’s ailing me. You don’t know how I feel. You don’t understand that it’s all real. That life just tries to bring me down. It’s not a joke cause I’m no clown. Well I’m sick I need my medicine. Hey guess what? The doctors in. I said hey guess what? The doctors in!

I think you're hard to get over
I think you could still be mine
I think you're a super nova
I think you make the world shine
I think you're made of stardust
I think you know that you are
I think that love might destroy us
I think that you're near yet so far
I think you know that you're perfect
I think you know that I'm hooked
I think if you left I'd be heart wrecked
I think you can't be overlooked
I think I'll love you forever
I think you've stolen my heart
I think I'll follow you wherever
I think we should never part
I think you know that I love you
I think you might just be scared
I think you might love me too
I think this love might be shared

The sparkles in your eyes,
Captivate my mind.
You serenade me,
And set my heart free,
This hasn't happened for the longest time.
The music in your soul
Makes me lose control,
And is in perfect time
With all of my rhymes,
This hasn't happened for the longest time.
There's something in the way you move
That draws my eyes to you.
You gave a kick start
To my now love-struck heart.
This hasn't happened for the longest time.
If I only I knew
Why I'm inspired by you
And the sparkles in your eyes
Make me write.

Left black and blue,
Coloring outside the lines,
Her skin's what she bleeds through
And her  eyes are  the tiny windows
You can see through.
She wanders the streets,
Searching for someone
Who eye's she meets.
Searching for someone,
Someone sweet.
Plagued by violence,
She lived her life
Trapped in silence,
Til, coated in bruises,
She began her defiance.
Beaten and broken
She's left her past
And pain unspoken,
Til, coated in bruises,
Her rebellion was awoken.

If I could write you a song
To make you fall in love
I would already have exhausted
Every existing note
And created some new ones just for you.
I'd master every instrument
And grow extra arms
So I could serenade you
With a symphony just half as beautiful as your soul.
If I could write you a song
To make you fall in love
I would already have exhausted
Every combination
Of our twenty-six letters.
I'd master every language
And grow extra tongues
So I could serenade you
With a symphony just half as beautiful as your soul.
If I could write you a song
To make you fall in love
It'd be a duet
Because you play too
And I don't like how my voice sounds
Without yours accompanying it.
We'd play together
So we could serenade each other
With a symphony just half as beautiful as our love.

They call it stormy Monday,
But Tuesday's a hurricane.
Wednesday's even worse without you babe.
Thursday's also sad,
And Friday's just as bad,
Saturday ain't worth the wait without you babe.
I'll spend my first Sunday in church
Prayin' all day,
For you to come back baby.
They call it stormy Monday,
Since my baby went away.
Tuesday's been a hurricane
Cause my baby went away again,
Wednesday's even worse
Its like livin' with a curse without you babe.
Thursday's also sad,
And Friday's just as bad,
Saturday ain't worth the wait.
Then Sunday came like it was fate,
And I prayed for you all over again.
Every Monday's stormy without you
And every day just gets more blue.

He feels like Carolina,
Looks like California,
Shines like those city lights in Philly.
He's wild as Wyoming,
With eyes like the Montana sky.
He's exotic like Hawaii,
Even though he's from Detroit.
He feels like Carolina.
He feels just like home.

I loved you as Icarus loved the sun,
Dangerously, too hot, and too close.
And so I fell into the sea.
You lured me out
With your siren's song,
Till I fell again, this time into love.
I loved you as Samson loved Delilah,
Wildly, blindly, and openly.
And so I fell, among my hair, to the kitchen floor.
You picked me up, just by the heel,
And left it open to Cupid's arrow,
Till I fell again, on a battlefield caused by love.
I loved you as only I could,
Dangerously, blindly, and freely,
And so I knew you'd be my downfall.

I've always wanted to travel the world.
So I will trek,
Across your skin,
Sail through your veins,
And climb over each goosebump.
Your bones will guide me,
So that I don't lose my way.
I'll explore the ridges of your lips,
And swim in the pools
That are your eyes.
I've always wanted to travel the world,
But your heart
Is where I'll make my home.

My hands are shaking
And my nerves are shot
My whole body is quaking
And my heart's in a knot.
I need a quick release,
For some dopamine to flow.
I need to make some peace
And I needed it long ago.
So now I'm just blowing smoke,
Lips wrapped around a cigarette.
I'm out here going broke
But I feel no regret.
I'm spending all I got
Burning through packs.
I'm so **** distraught
And I just can't relax
Till the nicotine kicks in
And the smoke pours out.
I keep on giving in
Cause I just can't do without.

Madmen and lovers have such seething brains
Inspired and insipid they feel their pains
Madmen, their imagination bleeding into fact
Lovers, past the point of no turning back
Inspired to create anew
Insipid in what they are required to do
Madmen and lovers dream the same dreams
They know nothing is as it seems

I remember when I was just 13
I had dreams of getting shaded under a money tree.
But there was so much despair around
I started to worry I'd die in that town.
But then I had a dream in which I took solace,
A dream where I blew up like Chris Wallace.
I decided right then and there the sky's the limit
And it ain't just a phrase I live it.
And I can't change the world till I change myself
So I'm putting all this ******* on the shelf.
I knew that I had to go to any ends
Just to hold on to surviving friends.
We look up every night and thank our lucky stars
Cause we don't know how we made it this far
When we were just a public disturbance
Raised in a jungle that was urban.
But we on that 8 mile vibe now
We're gettin out, god knows how.
But we know now that the sky's the limit
And it ain't just a phrase, we live it.

Show me your scars
And I will run my fingers over them
To show you I am not afraid.
Show me your bruises,
Black purple and blue,
And I will kiss them til they heal.
Show me your broken heart, my dear,
And I will give you mine
Until yours is mended once more.

I want to travel the world
And make love in every country
Where I'd forgo each beautiful sight
Just to stare into your eyes.
I wanted to follow the stars
To a different home each night
But you've tamed my gypsy heart
And now the north star leads me to you.
You've caused roots to grow
On my once wondering feet
Til I was planted in front of you,
So happily stuck.
Flowers have begun to sprout
On every centimeter of skin
That you've caressed,
Each more beautiful than the last.
You've made me yours my dear,
Without asking.
And I've agreed,
Without telling.

I've lost so many things, my dear,
My head, my heart, my soul
I've lost my present, my future, and all times of old.
I've lost so many things to you,
My dignity, my patience, my love,
You took my time, my passion, and just a single glove.
I lost 3 pairs of socks to you, a toothbrush, and some more
I've left at least 2 pairs of pants on your bedroom floor.
You took my favorite sweatshirt and my favorite song,
You've even stolen my sleep, keeping me up all night long.
I've lost so many things to you,
My blood, my pride, the color blue.
You've taken so many things from me,
The sun, the moon, the sea.
You've taken so many things,
My dear, why won't you take me?

Waking up dead
With an empty head
Not a single thought
To be had
They're all out today.
I'm overwrought
And under thought
With pretty lies
My love is bought
And then thrown away.
I've got my disguise
I've got my lies
They're indiscernible
To untrained eyes
It's like child's play.
Waking up dead
With an empty head
All that's in store
Is going back to bed
Its just not my day.

A tree,
Flowers,
Some tomatoes,
Your lips on mine.

The exhibitionist
Taking every risk,
Putting everyone in danger
Just to be a little stranger,
Appearing more clear in its simplest form
Cause you're terrified just to conform.
So scared to lose yourself
That its affecting your health,
You're losing all your friends
Cause you'll go to any ends
To stand up and stand out.
So there isn't any doubt
That "nobody's you-er than you
And that's truer than true".
But you're false, you're fake
And it makes your heart ache
So now you're speaking out,
Cause there's so much doubt
That you're even you
Cause you don't even know what's true.

Our story begins with a girl. She was beautiful, but not in the way you might expect. Her hair did not drip with gold; her eyes were not the color of the summer sky. Her smile was crooked and broken, and the bags under her eyes, omnipresent. Her hair did not shine, nor did her eyes, and her laugh was tired, as was her smile. And yet, she was beautiful. She was beautiful in the way the ocean kisses the shore, in the way poetic words flow from broken hearts. Mostly she was beautiful because she refused to taste defeat, even when it was all there was to eat. Her name was Joy, though she never felt any.

I hate the way you look at me
With the whole world in your eyes
I hate the way you hint to me
That you're capable of lies
I hate the way you kiss me
That makes the world stop
I hate the way you smile at me
That makes my heart drop
I hate your stupid uniform
That makes me want you more
I hate the way that your heart
Is always a closed door
But most of all I hate the way
That into love, I did fall
And I hate that I don't hate you,
Not at all.

You look so pretty in your glass house,
Stones in hand.
You look so silly in your glass house,
Thinking you could withstand
All the gasoline
Burning up those bridges you built.
I guess when you were fifteen
You weren't thinking about all this guilt.
You look so silly with that little kettle,
Making fun of the *** behind her back.
Those words stinging her like nettles,
Until, finally she cracks.
You look so mean standing there
Ruining lives without care

I was seventeen when we first met,
Pushed together by fate.
You kissed me on the cheek,
I felt the weight of your lips for weeks.
At nineteen you serenaded me
With that silly little song,
I still listen to it all the time,
Remembering how our voices sounded intertwined.
Now that you have kissed me
My heart is fully thawed.
I desire you forever mine
If you, my dear, are so inclined.

It been days
Since I've slipped into blissful sleep.
I'm running on fumes
Of nothing but caffeine.
My bed mocks me
And my pillows call my name.
The only relief I have,
Is a cigarette or two
At 3 a.m.
My hands shake
And so do my legs
As I tell everyone I'm okay.
"You need sleep"
They urge.
But this is the life
Of an insomniac.

You make me forget
When our fingers intertwine
Your lips erase
All my troubles when they touch mine
You make me forget
When you hold me in your arms
Your touch pushes
All the fears from my mind
You make me forget,
My dear,
And for that
I couldn't be happier

Give me fiction
Give me lies like never before
Cause lately
I've been wanting more
The truth is overrated
Its overrun
But most of all
Its overdone
So give me fiction
Spin me a wonderful
Web of lies
Make them meaningful
Don't be real
Please make it fake
Cause the truth
Makes my heart ache
So give me fiction
A beautiful tale
Trick me into thinking
We will never fail
Give me fiction
Give me lies like never before
Cause lately dear
I've been wanting more

You and me
Are mired in misery
We can't let go
And we can't say no
Tied to each other
Yet killing one another
We push pull and fight
Argue through out the night
But we kiss through the days
And so our love stays
So maybe its not perfect
Maybe its all wrong
But wrong feels so right
When you pull me in tight
You can't walk away
When I keep begging you to stay
We know that this is wrong
We've known it all along
But I'd give anything to make it right
Anything for you to love me through the night

Family?
You don't know the meaning of the word.
It's not about drunken mistakes,
Arguments that last for days,
Abuse that lasts for years,
Or scars that last a life time.
Blood doesn't make a family,
Because the blood between us
Runs thinner than water.
Family means love,
But that's never been in your hearts.
You're my worst nightmare,
But maybe that's just family.

I was not starving,
Until I tasted you.
I have been ravenous ever since.

I am in love,
My dear,
With a moment
We never had.
I marvel,
My dear,
At the possibilities
In our future.
I dream,
My dear,
Of the day we lie
Side by side.
I hope,
My dear,
For our night,
All in white.
I know,
My dear,
I'll dance in your arms
Some beautiful night.

It starts in your heart
Then it pumps to your blood.
The art of dying isn't hard to master.
Then it moves to your bones
Then into your nerves.
Now its moving faster.
It spreads to your head,
Soon you'll be dead.
The art of dying isn't hard to master.
It feeds on your dreams
And snacks on your hopes.
Now you're dying faster and faster.
You're losing your thoughts
And your memories are gone.
The art of dying isn't hard to master.
Now your skin is pale
And your lips are white.
You couldn't have died faster.
The art of dying was not hard to master.

This one's for the rebels and outcasts,
The Kubricks and Kerouacs.
This one's for the lovers,
And the poets undercover.
We'll run, run away
To a brand new day,
With no rules to obey,
Far from all those shades of grey.
So come dear,
Abandon all your fear,
Our future will be so clear,
When we live as cavaliers.
We'll lead a mutiny,
Until we're living free,
Away from all the scrutiny,
We'll run dear, just you and me.
So come dear,
Abandon all your fear,
Our future will be so clear,
When we live as cavaliers.
So all hail the outlaws,
Come on and join their cause.
All hail the cavaliers,
Living free as fear.

There's something beautiful
About the way
Your lips speak my name,
And the way
Your fingers fit perfectly with mine.
It's beautiful
How your smile
Pierces my heart,
And how your eyes
Pierce my soul.
There's something beautiful
About your soul, my dear
And the way it intertwines,
Perfectly with mine.

Tell me dear,
Do you wish we'd fall in love?
Cause its all I'm thinking of.
Tell me dear,
Do you think I had a chance?
I was captivated after just a glance.
Tell me dear,
Is this just a dream?
You cannot be as perfect as you seem.
Tell me dear,
Where do I start?
You have stolen my heart.
Tell me dear,
Will you take my heart?
Cause I've been hooked from the start.
Tell me dear,
Are you what you seem?
Cause you are my dream.
Tell me dear,
Was it just a glance?
I hope you'll give me a chance.
So tell me dear,
Do you wish we'd fall in love?
Cause its all I'm thinking of.

Something in the way he moves,
All I can do is stare.
Something in the way he moves,
Oh God, it isn't fair.
Something in the way he sings
Calls my heart to him.
Something in the way he sings
Fulfills my every whim.
Something in the way he shows me
The beautiful ways he loves,
Something in the way he shows me,
That he was sent from up above.
Something in the way he moves me
Sings my broken heart to sleep.
Something in the way he shows me
That he is mine to keep.

I have romanticized hotel beds.
As a kid, I called the concrete home,
And nothing was better than a hotel bed.
My brother and I would fall like Icarus
Onto the feathery home as we said,
"There's nothing better than a hotel bed".
They were our trampolines, our forts
That protected us from the horrors we knew
And in that hotel bed we were nothing short
Of limitless.
We could laugh, we could fight,
For once we could be warm through out the night.
But that bed was more than just a place to sleep,
It was an escape from the every day.
Its something every child knows,
And most adults have tried to forget.
That whenever they lay
In that fluffy white bed
The world is their's to own.
So whenever I see a hotel
I'm transported back to long ago
When cold and wet
My brother and I
Fell, deeply, into a hotel bed.

Dear I just can't forget
How your lips caressed mine,
Or wrapped around a cigarette.
Your stare still penetrates,
Though it hasn't met mine
In quite some time.
The ghosts of your fingertips
Dance along
Every inch of my skin,
And your smell still lingers
In the many folds
Of my sheets.
You're hiding at every corner
And lurking
Around every turn.
I can't quite escape
The memories of you,
They've invaded my senses dear.
You're trapped
In every piece of me,
Yet you're miles and miles away

Its been 243 hours and 27 minutes since we last talked.
(Not that I'm counting)
Its been 2 weeks since I felt your lips on mine.
(Not that I'm counting)
I haven't slept in over 8 days
(Not that I'm counting)
And my heart has shattered into 286 pieces.
(Not that I'm counting)
I tried counting the times you took my breath away.
(I lost count)
I even tried counting the nights I dreamt of you.
(The number was too high)
I was reduced to counting the times I loved you, and never said it.
*(I'm bad at math anyway)

Crowded rooms
Are the emptiest places
For rebels and outcasts.

You were so smooth
When you hot-wired my heart
And stole it in the blink of an eye
You took my heart for a joyride dear
But you forgot all the joy

I'm lost,
I don't know what to do.
I've got this hammer in my hand
But I'm pounding on a *****.
I've gone too far
There's no turning back.
Even the fundamentals,
I lack.
My head's spinning,
And my tears begin to flow
But through all of this
I'm grinning
Why?
I don't know.
Smart's gone crazy
I don't know if I'm asleep or awake
What once was clear is hazy
And I don't know if I'll live.