My heart bears an unfamiliar rhythm,
Restricted, out of key, tone and voice
Silent but still heavily felt
Craving the glimpse of your presence
Absence makes the heart grow fonder and fonder and fonder
Craving a presence I cannot feel but only dream
Holding on to an idea, a wish, a memory
An ocean dehydrating inside of me for reality to occur
But still my vision of you is blurred
Because an idea seems more real than any reality

I create heightened pieces of you in my heart
Yet my mind is not fooled but can clearly see
That You are just an imagination of my desires
And in reality you are nothing more than a simple acquaintance
Not suitable for even the smallest measure of love from my soul
Yet it's not love I feel but passion
Not you but elements of you

Yet the battle between my heart and brain
Make my feelings harder to comprehend
Absence makes the heart grow fonder and fonder...

Skin intimately kissed by the golden sun to a permanent brown tan,
Not olive but brown like the chocolate that melts softly on your tongue
Brown like the sugar that sweetens your tea just right
With ***** hair that refuses to stay down
It radiates and bounces up with a frizz and a twist with a spin like a dance
Yes I dance because I'm proud to be a black girl
Created imperfectly perfect by the artwork of God

Never let your lips spill
Of the over flowing tears in your heart.
Since no one can understand the steps of your path.
So rest your fears and tears in the God who holds your perfected destiny

Be the good woman that is hard to find
And worth much more than diamonds.
Proverbs 31:10

I speak words
You don't understand
A language of mysteries
From readings of my hand

I speak of a future
You speak of a past
I speak of a freedom
You speak of a prison
I speak of happiness
You speak of a depression

I speak words of life and I live
You speak words of death
and you die yet  still breath

I've lost the key that opens the door to my heart,
It's like a painter painting without a brush to an incomplete piece of art.
Like a bird singing a song that cannot be heard
Like a poet writing poetry without a single word
It is the complexity that creates the confusion
Its Missing the flame that lights the spark to create a fusion.

The thief is known to come in the night time
But his not a thief but someone I used to call mine
I guess you could say he stole a piece of me
But he didn't I made the key and handed my heart for free
We danced to a song that only our souls could hear
Then he became out of rhythm and made me shed a tear
Since I knew his song had found a knew singer
So when he left I hoped he will return making me the jackpot winner
But he comes and then he go's
And now I feel his warm breeze that keeps me froze

So I light the candle in the darkness he created
I search through all the men I have previously dated
But there is no one I find but him
That can create fire inside when the match is dim
When he reappears he takes my heart to dance
We take two steps forward and I give him another chance
Then two step backwards while I'm
Lost in his dark eyes
And in them I see the missing key to my jackpot prize

I am not a poet
Just a complicated passionate soul.
Each word I write is an extract from my heart
You don't need to understand
Just feel my heartbeat..

Now I feel what the lyrics mean
Now I understand the emotions behind the poetry
Now I've defined the art by the artists
Now my heart sings in time with the violins
Now I have become a reflection of the girl you in movies
Who loved and lost
And has to let it go
Since he has moved on

Now I understand there are unsaid prayers through tears
The agony of wanting what someone  now has
Of loosing what someone has just found
Of missing

But now I start to find God
I find comfort and love
Now I seek God
Now I find the meaning of life
Now I see the light at the end of the tunnel

Me darkness and light all happen now
Now

We all have our thorns in our roses.
Whereas some still produce the perfected sweet scent,
Some wither away if broken from the roots of their growth

Your words become waves
As they gently kiss the barriers of my mind,
I've always admired the stillness of the ocean
As it carries cowardly sailors back to shore,
For the depths of my ocean  dehydrates weak minds
And drowns those who swim with closed eyes,
But I like how your words tip toe when you speak
I often wonder about the fragile thoughts your lips will never mutter,
But I will remain wading
For the day you'll skinny dip
Your way into my ocean,
Till then I'll admire your presence
On your midnight walks as you  visit my shore.

He sent me to another place,
A place of nirvana
Still and peaceful
But still affectionate
Such a pleasurable experience
Lost in a mystery
Wondering what he was thinking
Cause my mind is stuck in a singular opinion
That all this is for the surface gain than a deeper reasoning

He is a special soul
Deeply crafted
And I'd love to one day enter the centre of his deepest thoughts
But I don't think he will want to feel my troubled soul

I lay on his chest, listening to the racing beat as I cherish the small infinity with me.
I wished it was longer
And I wish I could have entered his mind just to watch the various thoughts go by.
Was he just thinking of my curves or was he more devoted to wanting to make a deeper connection
I didnt know, but I wanted to
I still do
But maybe that night is all him and I get together.

I fell in love with him
But he wasn't ready for that.
Wasn't ready for me.
Wasn't ready for love.

Then a few years later

He fell in love with me.
But I wasn't ready for that.
Wasn't ready for him .
Wasn't ready for love .