I've doubted your passion towards me in the past
my faith in the past
my faith in our permanence was dwindling fast
But as days go by,
you drift closer to me
and it's easier to see
how compassionate you truly can be
I'd don't want to have your babies
I'd don't want to get married
but I could see getting a dog with you
maybe
just
maybe

Look, I really appreciate whatever it is you're trying to do.
But, I’m really gonna need you to just
Shut the ever loving **** up;
Because you mean well
But you don’t listen to a word that comes out of my mouth.
You offer hollow advice
And you sound a hell of a lot
Like a guy I really wanna ******* deck in the face
So now you’re kinda morphing into a guy that I
Kinda want to deck in the face.
And hey, maybe I just really need to ******* deck somebody in the face.
But then you blame me because you don’t understand,
Well you never tried to in the first place.
I’m sorry my problems are not wrapped up in pretty packages.
I’m sorry they’re not easy to clean up messes like water on linoleum
I’m sorry they’re red wine on white skirt
I’m sorry I drank all the wine
I’m sorry the fact it looks like blood makes you uncomfortable
But blood is thick and messy and it stains
So don’t expect wine to be much different
Only because it’s more socially acceptable to make a mess with it
So please,
Take your halfhearted help,
And give it to someone who halfheartedly gives a ****.

I need a car
Maybe it’s so I can run myself over with it
Maybe it’s because I need a beat up machine
That’s in as bad of shape as me
So that i know if i care about it
Maybe one of these days someone will care about me
Maybe I want a car because it’s less poetic and
I’m just tired of catching the bus

Kinda wanna get a car to run you over
Kinda wanna run myself over
Racing towards my future and new responsibilities
But flooring it to escape just that

Open road baby, in the smallest space I could possibly choose
Maybe that’s the whole point
I get to choose which way to turn
To follow maps or to get lost in ******* nowhere
I can take care of myself and replenish when we’re both running on empty
My fingers are itching to wrap around something
And This is the most legal option
I can stare at the road and not the empty passenger seat
I need a car to personify myself
Because I don’t feel human anymore

Now we've come to the end
And I have so much to thank you for
so thank you for wasting my time
for making me second guess every move I make
for helping me weave a tapestry for my teenage years
one laced with paranoia and bad timing
thank you for pushing me away
which forces me to let go
forces me to grow and wrap my arms around myself
instead of you
thank you for forcing me to put the care and effort into myself
for making me less hollow
by leaving
Thank you for letting me know you didn't care
and that's okay because now I know it wasn't my fault
thank you for letting me breath

Throwing silk sheets over a worn mattress
I cannot fathom the idea of you sleeping here
you accidentally pulling a corner off and seeing the stains beneath.
This hotel has been vacant for months.
But that doesn’t mean the guests before you
Were kind to it.
They said ‘**** it’
Left the mess for house keeping,
Blood stained walls
Feathers from ripped pillows
A maid sighs and shakes her head
Ten dollar tip for wasted effort
Have to put the pieces back together again
Vacancy sign illuminated again.
Do not do this to me again.
Cleaning supplies are expensive.
And this business has made me so poor

There you are- minding your own **** business
Getting the **** done that you need to get done
And it hits you
A ******* papercut

Funny how something so seemingly harmless and innocent
Can cause so little damage
That bothers you so ******* much
A drop of blood and days of discomfort

Something so miniscule disrupting the simplest of tasks
Stinging like screams for attention
How are you supposed to move on
And make lemonade out of what life hands you
When the juice stings your fingertips
When relief is only resolved
When the issue is acknowledged.

But it’s fine you know
Everything is fine
Plenty of people use paper everyday and live to tell the tale
So really it’s not a big deal
Get enough and your fingertips will callus over
Soft things don’t go well with hard edges
Maybe by not being soft, then you can get more **** done

But by getting hard you’ll feel less
And wouldn’t it be nice to feel all things
Knowing fully well it’s worth the pain of a ******* paper cut