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Ellowyn Rose Feb 2019
Dear society,

I’m mad at you. Your lies, the images of “ideal” vandalized in everyone’s mind, driving them to cut shapes in their skin and end themselves. I’m mad because we were given the gift of difference, the gift of a mind possibly like no other. I’m mad because we did everything wrong with gift. The animal in us still wants to get to the top, the very top of the line because that’s how we survive. By making ourselves stand out. We killed each other and made our families watch. We cut through those who denied our presence with blades and stones. We never once thought about peace. Or maybe we did, but the screaming in society, the dominant voice that led us into self destruction has trampled over the little gleam of hope. I wish I could just be mad at you, but I’m not. I’m mad at myself, because I tell myself I hate that image that every girl follows, I hate that promise society makes that if we use this, our lives will get better. But I still follow that stupid image. I fall for every promise society makes even though it doesn’t know what it’s doing. It’s hard to say we’ve gotten over that image, because we still want to get to the top of the line like everyone else. We take pills to forget who we’re mad at. We take the knife in our hands to distract us from what we so desperately need to pay attention to. We flourish in our dark bedroom, because the cold floor is used to our weight and the ceiling is used to catching our anger as it rises above us and takes over. We’re still following that light whether we like it or not. Why in a world so advanced, smart, emotional, delicate and indestructible are we so blind to what is ruining us altogether? Not by war, not by bullets, but by that image that we look up to. By that artificial light that drives us to **** each other. By a world so driven to getting to the top, that we fall trying to get there.
Ellowyn Rose Feb 2019
Dear humans. What have we become?
Our ingenious qualities are ignorant
We want success and we want it for ourselves

Dear humans. Are we really that smart?
Do we know deep down that we are destroying the only resource that keeps us alive?
Because we only want success and we want it for ourselves

Dear humans. Does is even matter?
Do we really not see what’s in front of our eyes?
It seems as though we shove it to the side and pretend it doesn’t exist.

Dear humans. You know what I’m talking about it.
The earth has survived 7.4 billion years, but we come along and end it there.
Because who knows, 7.5 could have been the unthinkable.
But we were too caught up in our dream and decided that we should just give up.
Not by intention,
By mutated instinct.
Ellowyn Rose Jan 2019
I find joy in pain
Pain in my actions
Actions after my decisions
Decisions I didn’t want to make
Making up my mind
When I didn’t want to
I didn’t want to choose
Choose between you
You or my tears
Tears that flooded my smile
My smile
That followed after your voice
The voice
That gave me joy
In pain
Ellowyn Rose Jan 2019
When I was younger
All that mattered
We’re problems so little
Ones that made you think about life
Think about life
In my small, closed eyes
I had no pain, no real suffering
No troubles that got me thinking
About my sanity
I watched the time pass
And I tried to hold it still
And dreamt of the happy life
I would have some day
One without worries
One where everyone knew how to speak
A world with no hate
A world with real respect
A world where nobody put you down
Because of how you dressed
Or how you showed you truly
Loved
Ellowyn Rose Jan 2019
We always look at the moon
admiring its light
holding hands with one another
wishing upon a star
that lies around the aura of the moon's brightness

we seem to seek out
only what makes us happier
instead of appreciating
the dark side
sprinkled with inverted light
we don't appreciate
the beautiful disaster
that showed us
how to grow
with the pain
Ellowyn Rose Jan 2019
Welcome to my world
Of tragic memories
Where green grass gets gold
And the tulips blossoms never Blume
Welcome to my world
Full of waiting and thinking
Full of my darkest secrets
I keep in a black notebook
Hidden away
From eyes who wish to see my tragedies
Welcome to my world
Wondering and finding
thinking about humanity
Simply
Ending
Welcome to my world
Full of carbon dioxide
Species dying off
And and the oceans that rise so high
I can barely see
The cold sun
R i s e
Ellowyn Rose Jan 2019
And after the words you’ve said
to knock me down
and cast a spear at my heart
I run back to you
as the pain
is my familiarity.
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